So I Got Kicked Out of a Cab

[ 24 ] March 29, 2009 |

I am notorious for never carrying cash. I mean, I could go weeks without ever touching paper money. My debit card IS my cash, and is swiped often enough to just really quit working one day. I realize this isn’t good, because often times when one does literally hand over the cash, the palms are more willing to let go of the money.

My sis Mo has recommended that I always carry $20 emergency cash in my wallet because one never knows when there will be no debit card allowed or just in need of petty cash. And yes, I agree with her on this, but umm… crepes are emergency cash-worthy. No? Aight then. Either way, my emergency $20 usually lasts me a couple of days and I forget to replenish it, so there are times when I literally have nothing but 84 cents in actual money in my wallet.

dont-judge-me-rupaul gif

Lately, I’ve been taking cabs a lot for one reason or another (I’m late getting somewhere, it’s dark and I don’t feel like being on the train, my shoes are too high to allow any extra walking…). And I use my debit card for them most of the time, but thats because most of my cab rides are like $15 so it’s okay. I still feel some kinda way about paying them with my card because I know it’s not instant cash. Well, it caught up to me recently.

A couple of weeks ago, I was supposed to be meeting one of my BFFs, Sister VernaJean for dinner. But beforehand, I had to go to a radio station’s open house for work. Well, we were supposed to meet at 6 and at 6:10, I was still at the radio station, so I had to take a cab. I hailed a cab and it was an older Nigerian cab driver.

We get to the restaurant in under 10 minutes, and the cabfare is like $4.57. I go through my wallet looking for my emergency cash and realize I hadn’t replenished it. WOMP. Self FAIL. With shifty eyes, feeling mighty guilty, and very slowly, I take out my debit card and extend it to the cabbie. This is what met me.

Cabbie: *Looks at the card. Looks at me. Looks at the card. Looks at the meter. With thick Nigerian accent, says* “You don’t have $4?”
Me: *mumbles and looks down* No, I don’t have cash. Sorry.
Cabbie: *Long pause* GERROUT! (came out as one word)
Me: *thinking I didn’t hear him* Huh?
Cabbie: Get out. You will not be paying $4.57 with a card.

Hell naw. Only I could get kicked out of a cab. Dayum. I knew I couldn’t just get out the cab without paying him because I’d feel mighty bad (no Miss sofia). I had to pay him somehow.

Me: *finding the situation of being told to get out of a cab absurd and somehow funny and trying not to giggle* Let me call my friend to bring me money.
Cabbie: *exasperated sigh*

I could SWEAR I heard him say “rubbish” under his breath.

Me: *calling VJ* You got cash on you? (very valid question to ask because she is also not a cash-carrier)
VJ: Yeah
Me: *trying not to chuckle* Can you bring me $6? I’m outside in a cab.
VJ: HA! OK. Here I come.

She comes outside and hands me the $6. So I give the man his money and I swear he almost pulled off while I had only 1 foot on the ground. He could not get away fast enough.

When I got out the cab, I had to cackle. as VJ shook her head at me. I felt bad for trying to pay with a debit card. I really did. But when he told me to get out, iDied. I’ve been quit many times, but by a cabbie? Dayum. Shame on me. I will do better, I promise. One day. Not sure if it’ll be soon but…

A rendering of the cab hauling ass after I finally paid

Moral of the story: Don’t piss off a cabbie. Thank God for friends that carry cash. Carry emergency cash at all times.

Edit: So I’m senile right? I was just alerted that 57 cents ain’t a possibility on any cab meter. See what had happened was I don’t remember exactly how much my fare was. I know it was $4 something cents. So I made up the 57 cents. Funny how no one caught this until 14 hours after the blog was up. Tee hee. I will keep it though. Karyn is the one who commented on my Facebook status and said “How is $4.57 possible?” She gets Luvvie’s Smarty Pants Award of the day.

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Category: My Life

Comments (24)

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  1. amymay says:

    Could only happen to you! uKilt me with this post!

  2. Crown R0yal says:

    had he mumbled “classless wonder” lkkjdslfkjglsdk
    s;dlfk
    a;gla
    asv;alsmvwvsa
    dca;dlmvaewr

  3. KindredSmile says:

    Psht, this happened to me plenty of times, and each time I remind the cabbie that paying with a card is in the Passenger Bill of Rights that’s handily posted in the backseat. He doesn’t want the card? Then he doesn’t want the fare. You already know how I feel about testy cabbies anyway.

  4. Mr. Smart Guy says:

    Am I gonna have to slide you some moola this weekend?

  5. JunePearl says:

    Bwahahahahaha!!! He was really gonna let you go without paying, woooooow! Chicago is mighty nice. I had a cab driver drive me to an ATM when I didn’t have cash, and wait for his money …wait for it… $2! LOL! I heart your story so much!!!!!!

  6. Joe Schmitt says:

    So what you’re saying is that I need to bring cash to lunch? Good thing I’m so old school.

  7. South Loop Social Light says:

    Wow. Cabbies are getting out of control. I can’t say that I’ve ever been kicked out…wait, I have had one think I was trying to steal his soul when I took a pic of him. lol…

    It was very nice of you to pay the cab because if I got put out I would’ve kept it moving. lol…

  8. Ms_Slim says:

    LMAO!
    Girl the first question that pops out my mouth when I take a cab is…”do yall take credit?” I too am a never ever carrier of cash. Why? Well because I feel like it’ll go too quickly.

    But then I got in the habit of taking out some cash to hold whenever I got paid and ended up never using it because I am so used to my handy dandy piece of plastic. smh.

    I still have no cash though. Shame.

  9. Offdwall says:

    I feel ya completely on this one. I never carry cash because I just can’t hang on to it. And it doesn’t help when everybody and their stripper cousin takes anything with a VISA on it. this has gotta be a sign o’ the times. LOL

  10. NaturallyAlise says:

    dang you are the quittedess heifer i have ever met, too funny….

  11. Luvvie says:

    Amy – I’m a walking personification of mishaps

    Crownie – You stoopid, lol. He didnt call me that but believe that if he would have, I’da been no good and cackled in his face

    Kindred – I know its in their Passenger Bill of Rights but I think errtime someone uses a card, it charges them a lil. And thats makes me feel bad. Its rough in these streets

    Smartie – Lol if there’s no ATM around, you may have to. I shall bring cash

    June – LMAO not $2! He wasted that much gas looking for an ATM *smh*

    Joe – Old school is the right school sometimes

    South Loop – He thought you were tryna steal his soul? iCant. and iWont

    Ms Slim – They HAVE to take credit so I never ask. But I be feeling all bad sometimes

    offdwall – LMAO @ everyone and their stripper cousin. Yeah ever sicne that Tip Drill video. But that is one place I will NOT be swiping my card EVER!

    Alise – I am the most Quittingest indeed

  12. Ms_Slim says:

    Wait they HAVE to take credit?

    Hmm…

    I went to NYC a little while ago and had to cab it to my office after and the cabbie told me they didnt take credit. All I had on me was 34 bucks so thats why I asked. My fare came to exactly 33.80 or something. So when I couldnt tip, he was mad and didnt even help me get my bags out.

    Sucks for him. Folk at the office told me that he should have been able to take credit. I said that he pretty much lost out on his tip because I would have tipped him cash…but not in with the credit lol (cause I just didnt want to do it that way lol)

    Oh well for him *shrugs*

  13. Lite Bread says:

    Awesomely Luvvie,
    Funny!
    What sucks even more is when that happens and you’re out of town. When “The Company” sends my butt outta the office, we’re suppose to use our company-issued credit card; for everything (everything that’s reimbursable that is. Not the girl I met in the …).
    So there you are buying gum at the airport, “Uh, mind charging that?” (‘Course what stuff cost at the airports I might need to charge it).
    I now do the same as previously mentioned; before I even take the taxi ride or sit down to eat I ask “You all take this …?”

  14. sabrina says:

    Well, at least he kicked you out at the end of the trip…

  15. bogart4017 says:

    hilarious. Everyone at work found it amusing. Anyone else would have been slinking away into the darkness…

  16. zerodemocracy says:

    Once in Logan Square I saw a cabbie chasing a guy who ripped him off with a knife. I wonder how that turned out.

  17. Anonymous says:

    In Chicago all cab drivers are required to take credit/debit cards. Next time they tell you that all you have to say is “Oh let me call consumer services” and suddenly it won’t be a big deal.

  18. Jeremy says:

    Funny blog post! Further proof that cabbies hate plastic…

  19. Charlotte says:

    Girl, that is too funny! Your life adventures in Chicago sound JUST like mine. I’m convinced that crazy, unbelievable shiz happens to me just so I can tell the story later. Hilarious.

  20. Good day! I know this is kinda off topic nevertheless I’d figured I’d ask. Would you be interested in exchanging links or maybe guest writing a blog post or vice-versa? My blog covers a lot of the same topics as yours and I feel we could greatly benefit from each other. If you happen to be interested feel free to shoot me an email. I look forward to hearing from you! Wonderful blog by the way!

  21. Kawanis says:

    Girl seriously, your blog give me life daily. I’m here for it! That was hilarious!

  22. nichole says:

    Kicked out of a cab? He was telling the truth about paying $4 with your card. I’ve done it too, far too much.

    I’m trying to do better about having cash. I think it’s becoming even more important with the breaches we are seeing. But like you, that card is handy.

    My mom and grandmother taught me a long time ago to keep emergency cash. The new morale is keep at least two $20 bills but in separate places in your wallet. One you may forget about until you need it.

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