5 Reasons Why I Love Lil Cease
Man, I was minding my own business (like I do often O__o) when I found out that Lil Zane was on Twitter. Well I was shocked so I looked him up. Where he been at?
I tweeted him a coupla times, and I ain’t get a response. Miss Jia tweeted him too and got nothing. But while we waited for a response by him, he had the nerve to tweet Ashanti talmbout “When can we expect something new from u sweetheart??? Can’t wait…” NAW SON! So we were all hurt like “Oh you give some folks smartphones and they forget how to act.” All he has are 500 followers so I know he seent our tweets. *rolls eyes* I was gon build Lil Zane the BEST geocities fanclub site too. With glittered background and ERRTHANG. But he played us to the left. so…
One good thing happened in spite of him ignoring us. We found out Lil Cease was on Twitter. Mufugging CEASE! Y’all ‘memba him from “Crush on You” with Old Lil Kim (with all her original parts), right?
The 8th grade me was TOO excited. It’s LIL CEASE! Where’s HE been at? Talk about falling off the face of the Earth. Then I saw he didn’t even have a verified badge. That’s that boolsheet I be talmbout Twitter. How y’all not gon verify Cease? Y’all could at least give him the badge you took back from Lil Duval. I’m just saying.
Anywho, me and Jia decided to start a Lil Cease Fan Club on accord of Cease being super cool and stuff. Shoo… WE LOVE CEASE! #Cease4Life So I decided to come up with:
5 reasons why I love Lil Cease
5. His name isn’t Waka. Remember back in the days when rappers were just “Lil?” None of them were called Waka Flacka Lame (that negro doesn’t deserve the F) anything. What’s a Waka Flacka? Why should I gibbadamb? Yes. I like my rappers “Lil.” And possibly not missing the 21st chromosome, which I think Waka is. He just never looks like he is all there. But I guess his existence is to allow us to appreciate other rappers. He is the pain to the joy that is Lil Cease. The rain to the sunshine.
4. He got swole. Umm… Cease ain’t calling himself Hard Body for no reason. Homeboy looks super solid now. So that’s what he’s been up to all these years. He ain’t come back out looking cracked out like others (*looks at K-Ci & JoJo*). Let me find out Cease wanna get FAHN…
3. He’s humble. Cease shonuff replied to folks who tweeted him, and did it all humble too. Humility takes you far. This is probably the main reason I’m stanning for him right now. I expected him to be an ass like most of the other famous folks on Twitter but he proved me wrong. Shoo… even if I ain’t love him, I do now. I ain’t have a churce. He don won me over. #TeamCease
2. Notorious. LAWD! Any man that’ll allow the boy from “Losing Isaiah” to play him in the biopic about his cousin Biggie, is A-OK with me. I’da flipped all types of tables if I was him. They couldn’t find no other skinny short dude to play him? They had to use Isaiah? No shade but that casting was just… O___o. Cease is a gentleman for allowing it. He’s a saint (like Dorothy Mantooth).
1. “Crush on You.” Fifty eleven years after this song first came out, it STILL GOES HARD! How hard? Let it come on in the club and see if everyone doesn’t start rapping along with it. Let the DJ cut it off before it ends and hear folks go “HELL NAW! Let it play!” This was and IS the joint! MAN!
“I know you see me on the video (TRUE!) I know you hear me on the radio (TRUE!) But you still won’t gimme no attention…”
“CD’s with crazy bass, keep my lady laced. Don’t be fooled by the baby face. I hope ya not, cause your thighs got me hot. Only one plan, that’s to rise to the top. I told you before, when I first pursued. I want a interlude, in the nude.” – Lil Cease
*kicks down a chair* YESSSSS!!! THAT. SONG. BEATS!!! 14 years later! LAWD! Where is my Lil Kim lime green wig when I need it in my lifespace?!?
Sidenote: *pours out a lil liquor for Old Lil Kim.* She was sooo cute! This stranger bish we got now just perplexes my soul. I can’t stare at her for too long without squinting. The chick should have stopped at 20 plastic surgeries ago. While she’s mad at the self-proclaimed Harajuku Barbie (Nicki MiWOMP), she’s doing her best impression of an Asian plastic doll herself. But I ain’t the one to gossip. So you ain’t heard that from me. Although I do like her *shudders* swag (for less of a better word).
Some of y’all are probably gon hate on Lil Cease, saying things like he’s irrelevant. Hmph! (-__-) Well so is Amerie but if that chick can make an announcement talmbout she’s adding an extra i to her name, then Lil Cease can plot his comeback. Shoo…Let a Lil Cease single come out and see if I’ont go burn buy it listen to it on YouTube. Look out for the fan page we making. Since geocities is no more, we gon come correct.
Editor’s note: Lil Zane ended up replying us back. But it’s too late. He’s tardy for the party. We already Team Cease. Hmph.
If I had a weave, here’s where I’d flip it and walk away. Someone get me a hairhat right quick! So are y’all gon join the Lil Cease Fan Club when we create it?
Edit #2: Lil Cease commented on this blogpost! This FURTHER lets me know that he is indeed DA BESS! #Cease4Life