Dear Wiz Khalifa and Amber Rose, Cut It Out
I have owed Wiz Khalifa and Amber Rose a sternly-worded letter for a long time. I never got around to doing it because Amber’s “leaked” nekkid pics distracted me. And then on Sunday on the VMAs Red Carpet, they made sure to gross everyone out by literally tonguing each other down. So I had to finally write this.
Dear Wiz Khalifa and Amber Rose,
Hey y’all, hey. I’ma just say it. Cut this out. Like right now.
First, I’ma address y’all separately. Wiz, pull up a chair. Sat on it and let me tell you about yourself. I have one main question for you. Are you allergic to soap and water? I’ve always wondered this because you got that Jim Jones syndrome going on, where you look like showers make your skin burn. Can you handle that “Black and Yellow” tint you got to you? CAN YOU HANDLE THAT? I mean… listen. Colgate is 3.99 and a bar of Irish spring is like $1.79 or something. You made enough money. Please go soak in a tub and try to wash off whatever grime always seems to linger on you. Ugh.
And Amber… hey girl. I kinda sorta liked you when you were with Kanye. Ok I’m lying. I ain’t like you much then either because you seemed EXTRA hoodratish. Like you can tell Kanye tried to add class to you but no amount of front row fashion shows could bring that. I ain’t e’em talmbout the fact that you were a stripper. Folks gotta do what they gotta do. But you just seem like the epitome of “you can take the girl out the hood…” Well, I did like you a TINY bit because your ass is ginormous, and you know I have booty envy for you junk in the trunkers. HOWEVER, after seeing your 7th nekkid pic, I was over it.
Plus, you keep talmbout Kanye. Ma’am, your bitter is showing. Kindly tuck it in. Your old peen is ruling the Hip Hop world, while your new one is attached to a salamander. I KNOW why you’re salty. BUT can you act like you’re not? You shoulda turned the opportunity to be seen on Kanye’s arms into gold by establishing some typ of business afterwards or something. IDK. I’ont gibbadamb.
But Wiz and Amber, I know you’re both excited that you found another attention whore to use as a beard or to play with when you’re bored. Congratulations. But I’m here to let y’all know that y’all are gross in your extraness.
Trust, we all know you’re together, because you don’t let us forget in interviews. HOWEVER, do you have to act all the way out on red carpets??? As if our eyes aren’t already burning from the glare from Amber’s forehead. Then y’all two want to get on there and snake tongue each other. THE FRENCH AIN’T INVENT THAT SO Y’ALL COULD GROSS US OUT!
That's Nassy. (Pic from MissJia.com)
That’s nasty. Don’t nobody wanna see that. Not Stevie. Nor Ray. Nor Helen. NOT ONE PERSON WANTS TO SEE THAT! Maybe if y’all had real for real talent, you wouldn’t have to tongue each other down to get press time.
Ew.
And I hope you both realize that this time next year, you might not be famous still. The Piggly Wiggly is always hiring, so at least you got something to land on. Just in case. I already checked for you. Because I care. You’re welcome! *smize*
Category: Famous folks
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I hate PDA! Esp when it’s like this…Damn, everyone knows Dirt McGirt is with Powder, why all this??? I’m sure that after sucking on his tongue, she had to douche her mouth out!
You just won the internet. Seriously, snorting coffee up your nose hurts, but it was worth it to read that.
Bwahahaha!!
Lmbo! Haven’t paid much attention to them but definitely confirms how weird of a couple I initially thought they were.
Lmbo! Haven’t paid much attention to them but definitely confirms how weird of a couple I initially thought they were. Love the letter!
*shudders just imagining how many STD’s and STI’s are being passed and invented there*
But Luvvie, how are you not gonna touch on all the extra-ness they display on Twitter? “I love you pookie wookie boo boo.” *barfs all over the keyboard* These two are so over the top. But I guess that’s what you have to do when you’re famous without actually doing anything. You have to find some way to stay relevent. Smh.
lmao!!!! not the piggly wiggly tho luvvie lol why cant they work at KROGER?! u slay me which is why I am an avid fan of your blog!
If “Jim Jones syndrome” and “junk in the trunkers” didn’t have me cracking up enough I then got to “Piggly Wiggly is always hiring” and just fell ALL the way out! LMAO!!!
These two….I dunno. Nothing seems real about their relationship to me anyway and then all this extra ass PDA??!? Nah. They can BOTH go back to wherever they came from.
For realsies. People be sleep on the Piggly Wiggly when it comes to career opportunities. Shoo…
Nall, jus’ nall. Thats straight up nasty and uncalled for. I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt but Amber Rose and Wiz Khalifa are the epitome of ratchedness. Methinks they are trying to get a reality show.
She ALREADY tried to get one about opening…wait for it…a sunglass business. Cause uhm, when Kanye was trying to class her up, she always wore shades. Apparently that didn’t work, so she’s trying something new.
Oh. O___O
They are the epitome of irrelevance. And you may be right. They might be shooting for reality TV. VH1 might could pick them up.
LOL. I just wrote a post on my blog about PDA’s yesterday and used them as an example. Glad I’m not the only one feeling the ick.
This is the PDA that makes me wanna gag. And it ain’t just cuz I’m a hater either.
UGH, Wiz Khalifa looks like he sprays himself with Scabies cologne. But, yeah they are doing the UTMOST most lately. Especially this recent “computer hacking” thang with Amber. -_-
LULZ!!! He do look like he uses Eau De Putrid as his scent of choice. And I ain’t got time for Amber and this “hacking” of hers.
That’s nasty. Don’t nobody wanna see that. Not Stevie. Nor Ray. Nor Helen. NOT ONE PERSON WANTS TO SEE THAT!
#DEAD
I’m just saying…
If she is tryna make Kanye jealous, anybody but Wiz stank a**. Every time Kanye sees or hears about the grossness of these two, he probably pats himself on the back and congratulates himself once again on one of his better career making decisions in dumping this hoodrat! And LMOA MissMaryMack *shudders just imagining how many STD’s and STI’s are being passed and invented there* . I died!
She’s accomplishing the opposite of making kanye jealous. I’m sure he’s now like “THE HELL WAS I EVER DOING WITH HER?!?”
So, I’m like really hating you right now for making me laugh so hard & making my head hurt. You owe me some Tylenol ma’am *lol*. Btw, I love your blog
*sends you a box of tylenol I stole from my mams* You’s welcome!
Damn I’m glad my head was in the sand so I could live peacefully these last few weeks, months, whatever….EWWWWW!
Sometimes, being out of the loop pays off. Sorry for bringing you into the know lol
Am I the only person that thought, “.. Dang his breath just looks like it stank.” when Wiz Khalifa came out with Black and Yellow? No? Alright.
And Amber needs to sit down somewhere and pay homage or whatever to Kayne, she’d still be a skrippa’ in wherevah’ the heck she came from if it wasnt for him.
You are not the only person. His breath looks like it smells like old shoes and fritos. Ew. And yes, Amber better be glad she got wifed by Kanye for that hot year. Shoo… ungrateful.
Ugh..he looks like he has Hepatitis Herpeliticness of the face. I cant with him at all….DEAR GOT!
They look like two monsters from Alien trying to eat each other’s face so the winner can go try and kill Sigourney Weaver. Like any moment one of those little metal mouths are going to dart out.
He looks like needs to be pressure washed . . .
Chile … don’t y’all know weed makes you look dirty?! If you smoke enough of it it dulls your cells giving you that ashy non washed look…o__O not sexy at all.
I have been over Amber …NEXT!
OMG,I’m so glad someone finally said it. They are uber gross they make my stomach hurt. Who told her she was sexy? Also who told him that he is not disgusting?