Louis XIII Liquor Costs HOW MUCH?
I walked into this DOPE Walgreens they just opened on State Street here in Chicago, and got my LIFE. First of all, the Walgreens is 2 floors, and they got everything! They even have a sushi bar (where the chef makes it for you to order) and a fro-yo spot where you can get flavors like coconut and strawberry banana. You know a place is fancy when it has frozen yogurt!
This Walgreens is LAIDT like a baby’s blanket. And I lost myself in it for like an hour. So on the 1st floor, there’s a whole section for “wine and spirits” and it was extensive. They had every drank (yes, drank) you could want. The day I went, they were even giving our Ciroc the day I went. FREE LIQUOR AT WALGREENS, Y’ALL! Yes, this place is everything. If they had a DJ and women in leaning kitten heels and fishnet, it woulda been a club!
So I walked around just looking to see all the names of drinks I didn’t know. There was a section that held premium liquor, in locked glass shelves. So to get any of the drinks in there, an employee would have to open it with a key. I started seeing names I recognized (because rappers talked about them). Courvoisier, Crown Royal, Cristal… Hip hop taught me these are what the cool kids drink, so I wasn’t surprised that they were hella expensive. $249, $449. DANG! But those were clearly small timers compared to the one that took ALL my attention.
Louis XIII.
Apparently, he’s not just a French king, but eternal life in cognac form. It was the bottle highest up, and it’s display looked a bit more glowy. Why? Because the label under it said $1,999.99.
*faints*
Do they mean pesos? Are those in dereon dollars? 2,000 AMERICAN dollars for one bottle of DRANK? FOR WHY? WHAT??? Why does it cost so much?
Does it guarantee immortality?
Does it help banish Voldemort?
Did someone scoop Moses’ desert sweat and call it Louis XIII?
Did one drop of Jesus’ tears fall into a batch?
Does one drop of this drink get me drunk AND high?
Is the glass unbreakable?
Does this thing pour itself?
Is this the Fountain of Youth in a bottle??
Do Louis the first through the twelfth come out and sing as I enjoy this cognac?
I have so many questions. For reasons.
Seriously. Can someone explain why this one bottle of libation cost a ton of dollars? I need to know. The bottle is all:
If I ever buy a drink that costs that much, I won’t share it with a soul. NO. MA’AMS or SIRS. Folks would ask me for a sip and I’d be all “HELL NAWL! You know how much this costs?” and then I’d mean mug them for even having the audacity to ask me. I’d be all:
I might not even share it with myself. Do I REALLY know me that well? I’d have to have a conversation with me, talmbout “Now Luvvie, if I give you some of this, I need to know you got my back for life.”
Shiiidddd a $2,000 drink better run a background check on everyone that comes near it. I’m just saying.
But really. Why does it cost this much? I ask. For reasons. I hope you know.
Category: Random
Subscribe
If you enjoyed this article, subscribe to receive more just like it.
Comments (47)
Trackback URL | Comments RSS Feed
Sites That Link to this Post
- 18 Creative Liquor Bottles You’ll Keep Long After They’re Empty | March 7, 2013
I wish I knew boo. LOL. Let me know when they get a DJ so I can visit Club Walmart. We’d never get anything like that in DC.
“If they had a DJ and women in leaning kitten heels and fishnet, it woulda been a club!” *murked*
Luvie you are a wonderful writer. In my grandma’s words “the Lord is gonna bless you!”.
But this line took me out and made me holler in the office everybody is looking at me like I need a drug test or something -> “I might not even share it with myself. Do I REALLY know me that well? I’d have to have a conversation with me, talmbout “Now Luvvie, if I give you some of this, I need to know you got my back for life.”
::DIES in laughter::
Surely they meant 2000 yen.
Cz for 2000 American dollars, this drink better do sum special things to me at night. And talk good shit in my ear the whole time. Tell me it loves me, I’m the only one, etc.
*just bury me a G*
Dead!
*lays down my burden* done!
*turns off the light and tucks myself in!*
LMBO! @ This whole post. The Jeroboam (sp?) version of this cognac costs $23k. *faints @ Club Wal-greens*
Jeroboam?
It’s a bottle size.
It’s a genie in a bottle, baby. You just gotta rub it the right way – and out pops a doppelganger that can go to your day job for you and not back-talk your boss. Or, it can FIND a job. This would at least justify the $2k as it would eventually pay for itself…
I just want to know is it laced with platinum or 24k gold? I saw this bottle and I was shocked. I mean 2k for a bottle- naw son, I’d rather buy some fly bags and shoes (or pay down that fool Sallie)
Knowing why I never go to Walgreen’s, that bottle is probably $8 at Crown. Actually I worked in a restaurant where that bottle was $8,500. Here are some facties I betcha didn’t know: 1. people buy it for the same reason dogs lick their nuts. 2. if you pay with something other than a 2 pound black metal AMEX, you’re a crass, high-maintenence douchebag who can’t hold his money or his liquor. 3. if you’re gonna swill that in a public place, you also paid exactly 25% as much for the girl you’re with. 4. you’re not going to tip, so F off.
The proper way to enjoy this is in the privacy of one’s mansion, either alone or with a toadying senator, whilst plotting to screw poor people. Only then can you appreciate eleven pounds of hand-blown crystal for what it is: an empty liquor bottle.
Also this $8500 bottle is one of only 2000 and the bottle itself is made of swarovski crystal. It was aged in wooden barrels for 200 years. I work at a 5 diamond hotel and we sell a shot for $550 plus tax and an 18% gratuity. The only up side to ordering this drink at my hotel is that if you purchase the last shot we give you the bottle and it’s original box. The bottle is worth $1600.
Actually, the Bottle is Baccarat Crystal. I’ve been behind a bar for 18+ years and have only sold 3 shots. We sell 2 1/4 oz. of Louis for $250. I just BROKE A BOTTLE today that was 3/4 full. NO JOKE!!
WHO BROKE THE BOTTLE??? Did someone pitch a fit afterwards? Cuz… LAWD!!!
LMAO @ Luvvie and GloBug!!!
“Does it help banish Voldemort?”
I CANNOT!!! Girl where ya been.. my work edays have been bleak without this ratchedneess!!
Voldemort..BWAHHHAAAHH
LUVVIE.. .me again.
Liqs and prescription pills in the same location!!! how did I miss this before? Walgreens is your pusha!!
lmao yes pusha!!!*cues curtis mayfield* lmao
+1
Luvvie, girl I missed you!
$2000 for some drank?!??! Shooot….we go together, and Ol Louis better do the dishes when we get home!!
It better cook the meal and clean the house too!!
dereon dollars?!
Lawwwwwd you are so damn hilarious!!!
I dang near fell out of my chair on that one LOL
GIRL! That State Street Walgreens is every single thing. I remember I raved about it all up and through Twitter and folks didn’t believe such a fancy Walgreens could exist. Me either! And upstairs is like a mini Sephora! LOVE.
And WHAT THE ENTIRE HAYLE. I didn’t see that LV liquor and it’s probably good for my back because I probably woulda collapsed right on that floor had I seen that price. LAWDT.
Luvvie, your questions left me for dead. However, as a card-carrying food nerd, I know why it costs so much…
http://www.louis-xiii.com/en#/collections/jeroboam/accueil
Wow…that is one finely crafted drink!
I love your writing style. I enjoyed reading about your vacation and am glad you have returned to the blog after a much needed break.
2 hours later is me pee’in’ it out worth $1,999.99 too?
(“vandervecken” spoke Truth. Robb Report)
I kinda agree about the Dereon dollars, cause clearly thats the same logo! From what I can tell from the website, it’s going to make me white and improve my credit score. Oh, and help me appreciate classics, like Mozart and sh*t.
I remember a Jay-Z interview where he said he once drank a $20,000 bottle of wine. I was like 0_________________O
Well, he couldn’t sniff it, could he? So he did the most he could: drink & piss it out in a 20k circle.
My life belongs to one & only LOUIS XIII. This is my dream.
Cognac is an exclusive product and especially this one is a product of very very old eaux de vies which means Remy Martin has maybe only a few barrels of cognac which are in this Cognac. Therefore it’s just expensive.
Especially the chinese and russian market go sky rocking at the moment about these kind of expensive products.
They do that ( Sell it for “a ton” of dollars )because rich people have the need for ish that us “little people” couldn’t afford, reasonably. So they can remind them selves that they’re better than the rest of the normal world. Only way I’m trying that, is if you do share, I don’t care if I hit the lottery, 2 stacks for a fifth of booze…. GTFOOH. Cognac taste like ass anyway.
It has to do with how it’s made and that it had aged over 100 years. I use to work as a cocktail server in a place that sold this and the price for a shot was $125. I had asked my boss if it was really worth it (since I would never have the money to even try it.) He laughed and said very much so. One night as we were about to close I was in the kitchen and he walks back and hands me a shot of this saying a customer bought it for him but wanted me to have the chance to try it. And let me tell you if I had the money I would always have this in my home. It tasted better then anything I have EVER had in my life!
I like to drink hennesy xo, its $200 a bottle here on the east coast and its the shizzz. But i was in miami at a club in the vip room last year and there was armed security around this one table, i asked the waitress what was going on, she told me they had a bottle of Henry IV dudognon heritage congac, so i google it……$2 million….. the empty bottle costs over $50k……..um……anyone know how much a shot costs??? Lol……btw i gotta check out that walgreens!!
I actually have one of these for sell 1,100 brand new. send me a message ‘thehighestchosen@yahoo.com’
I’m interested in your Bottle for sale
I have a full bottle of Louis XIIII never been opened seal is intact with crystal stopper, box, and instruction book, would like to sell.
Is your bottle of Louis XIII still available? How much are you selling for?
Have u ever had cognac before and I don’t mean the cheap o ass from the bodega in the corner from mom n popps? Do you have any idea what the cost to make is, to bring it to taste to keep the temp for a hundred years in a barrell at perfect temp and how many peeps does it take to look after it? Yeah u would pay $20 to listen to that piece of shit rap but if u multiply that by the yrs and care that peeps gave into it u will understand why…try alize instead, its the french gheto style for LOUIS de Troisiemme aka Louis XIIII
I saw a bottle last night and was told if you brought the bottle back (to France) you could get a Free refill.
Hi there I was looking to buy a bottle and from some reason found this site and your question I read a few answers but I don’t think anyone said if its worth it or not so… The answer is simple it is if your r into it
if you r not a cognac person don’t waste your money 
for me personally its worth every penny but i drink cognac on regular basis and if not this then any cognac xo ( Hennessy , Remy Martin ) if you want to try a good cognac start with chiper stuff and see if you like it or not.
good luck.
P.s sorry about spelling mistakes I’m Russian
Its actually worth $10,000 a bottle. Why does a wedding ring cost so much? Cause they want to that’s why silly. Incidentally, in Ontario its served in a beautiful lead crystal cut bottle carved in Italy, the bottle placed in a beautiful wooden box made in Hungary, on a lining of thick soft red velvet. The bottles have a resale value of $100. It tastes like apricot liqueur.