Politics

President Obama Looked Bored, Mitt Blinked a Lot and Sesame Street-Gate: Debate Recap

I watched the Presidential debate and it was 1.5 hours of side-eying and roast on my part. If you’re looking for a great post on all the issues and stances and rebuttals and whatnot, this ain’t that. Go to TheRoot.com, TheGrio.com and getchu some of that there. Me? I’m here to tell you who looked pasty and hapless. With that being said, lemme get right into it.

* I love how President Obama started by showing his boo some love. He was all “First, lemme say I love my baby, Shellie…” That man… Michelle girl. Listen. Ok I’ma be qwat. But she gets what I’m tryna say. OWWWW!

* Barack was on that stage looking like “black don’t crack” epitomized. His face was BEAT! I think they used NC45 MakeupForever for him. Meanwhile, Mitt Romney had on some browning oil. It TOTALLY didn’t go with his MAC Ruby Woo-colored tie. WOMP.

Mitt Romney Barack Obama debate switched hairhats

The people on Tumblr have NO chill. LMAOOO!

* Mittens lowkey thinks he’s running for class president. He got on that stage making these grandiose promises like “ELECT ME AND RECESS WILL BE ALL DAY LONG!” Sir… O__O

* If anyone was playing the drinking game where you take a shot when you hear “tax cut,” they were somewhere passed out from alcohol poisoning within the first 15 minutes of the debate. It didn’t help that Mitt was up there being a little tattletale talmbout “YOU said you gon raise taxes. NOT ME!” NO SNITCHING! (-__-)

* McMitt looked like he be thinking “why’s there a deficit? Can’t we just print more money? Is the Treasury outta paper?”

* Jim Lehrer was an ineffective moderator for most of the debate. He kept letting them (especially Mittens) interrupt him like he ain’t have a mic too. I wanted to yell out “Don’t let them punk you, Jim! SAY IT WIT YOUR CHEST!” But NAWL! They stepped all over Jim like he was the DREAM ACT before 2012. Y’all can’t be playing my dude like that.

Mitt Romney interrupting Jim Lehrer like Kanye West did Taylor Swift

*DEAD*

Chile, I can’t.

* Then Mitt was talmbout how he’ll do all he can do make sure America’s budget is balanced, even if it means borrowing money from China. UMMMM YOU GON BORROW MORE MONEY FROM CHINA?? LIKE WE DON’T OWE THEM ENOUGH! Mitt wants a gahtdamb PayDay Loan and I don’t e’em support it. He’s tryna get America a Rush Card funded by China. NO COUNTRY FOR THIS PLAN! NAWL, MITT!!!

But this was nothing compared to him talmbout how he’ll cut the funding for PBS if he has the chance. He e’em mentioned saying bye to Sesame Street. YOU EVIL SUMMAFOOL! YOU NOT GON SAT UP THERE AND PUT OUT THE GOOD FOLKS OF SESAME STREET! That has GOT to count as treason in the higher courts. YOU CAN’T CUT ELMO!!! *wall slides*

Sesame Street Budget tweet

Right! It doesn’t even make any sense!

He is a cartoon villain. I AM CONVINCED! What did Grover, Cookie Monster, Snuffleapugus, Oscar and Big Bird ever do to anybody but learn kids some stuff and make them dance? UGH. TAKE THAT BACK, MITT!

Grover Big Bird Mitt Romney

* Mitt Romney lied a lot. Which might explain why he was blinking so much THE ENTIRE TIME. He was just blinking all fast like he fights crimes with his eyeballs. Looking like he’s bout to flutter away. I noticed this halfway through the debate and after that, I couldn’t focus on anything BUT the blinking foolery. If he used logic with the same fervor he blinks with, he MIGHT not have me convinced that he ate glue often as a child.

* Barack didn’t do that well in the debates but I also don’t think he LOST like folks have been crying. I honestly think he was like “Listen. It’s my anniversary. I go home with Michelle so…” But it came off as him looking bored. He clearly looked like he wanted to be elsewhere while Romney got himself heard more just because he spoke louder, blinked more and interrupted far too often. He was Mariah Carey to Mitt’s Nicki Minaj. I need President Obama to snatch Mitt’s gradient hair in the next debate. He can’t be sitting up there filing his nails the next time.

Still. I’ll never forgive Mitt Romney for tryna cancel Sesame Street. (-_____-)

But yea… anywho. Whatcha’ll think of the debate?

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10 Comments

  1. Lalarochelle
    October 4, 2012 at 8:44 am — Reply

    I agree. The only reason it looks like Mitt did well is because Obama didn’t come for him like he should’ve. I’m waiting for the town hall to see the old Obama show up. That’s the only thing that made me unsatisfied.

    However, as a teacher, I was all the way done w/ Mitt when he decided to talk about poor and disabled kids in education. I felt like he was campaigning to go Zoolander and open a school for “Kids Who Can’t Read Good and Want to Do Other Stuff Good Too”

    Boy Bye

  2. yadi
    October 4, 2012 at 9:18 am — Reply

    Yea, I wanted to fight the air when Mitt went in on PBS and the look on Jim’s face was like “whatever dude…you need more people”.

    I can also understand Obama being preoccupied but he missed several opportunities to rip Romney. Honestly, it was hard to watch.

  3. LuckBALady
    October 4, 2012 at 10:44 am — Reply

    I feel the President was just laying back in the cut and let Mittens have this. The next two Mr. Obama will show America how it is really done. I know he is the President and whatever happens needs his FULL attention but that was wacksauce to have the first debate on their 20(!!!) wedding anniversary. I don’t want to work on my birthday…nawl he don’t want to stand up there debating the one percenter!#SavetheStreet2012

  4. msz
    October 4, 2012 at 11:49 am — Reply

    I don’t think Pres came hard like he should have but had he come out like that then he would be considered an angry black man. I think he will represent on the next one. As for Mittens, I wanted to flick him in the forehead…then I wanted to get my squirt bottle for every lie that came out his mouth…..squirt squirt!! BAD MITTENS!!!!

  5. Ain't nobody got time for Mitt!
    October 4, 2012 at 12:02 pm — Reply

    My initial reaction on the debate: AW HELL NAW POTUS! YOU JUST GONNA LET WILLARD CUT YOU OFF LIKE THAT, BRUH!? CALL WILLARD OUT ON HIS OUTSOURCING TO CHINA, CALL HIM OUT ON HIS “NEW IDEA” OF HEALTHCARE BECAUSE IT REALLY DOESN’T COVER “PRE-EXISTING CONDITIONS”, ETC.

    Then, I simmered down and became my normal and rational self. What I came to realize is that Willard Mitt Romney lied so much and completely changed his stance on 99% of the issues. Willard showed up as “Mitt the Moderate” not “Mitt the Conservative”. Getchu some of these thoughts of my economic wisdom right here: Mitt the Hypocrite said that he going to cut governemnt spending, and not raise taxes. Clearly sir, you CANNOT balance a budget in that fashion. It’s simple ARITHMETIC Like, we have debt with no additional revenue because he wants to give the wealthy a $5 TRILLION tax cut, despite his claims during the debate that it’s not true. Mitt lied like the person that told Lil Kim her plastic surgery is on point! Lied like George W. Bush did about invading Iraq and them having weapons of mass destruction.

    Now, I could hit my Toni Braxton and say “Let me count the ways” Willard Mitt Romney lied like a dog in heat last night, but I’ma chill though.

    The only fault of the President was too laid back in some aspects ie. China, “47%”, and all that. Mitt won based on theatrics and sold his lies. He should get an Oscar (no Sesame Street) for that performance. -______-

  6. October 4, 2012 at 12:36 pm — Reply

    Man it just seemed like a clusterf*ck for Obama in regards to his style. What I saw there was NOT the POTUS I’m used to nor the one I saw at the Democratic Convention earlier this year. I’m still trying to wrap my mind around why he didn’t bring up the 47% quote from Romney, his tax returns, Bain Capital. When Romney spoke all Obama could do was look down and not really engaging in eye contact. Romney was fighting to get his point across, whatever the f*ck it was. Yes we are used to Romney being flip-flop but he in my eyes, took control of the debate last night. Maybe because he is used to being in debates all this year, while Obama has not.

    I hope Obama uses this time to do his homework and step up his game. We need the Obama that had that fire in his eyes back in 2008 and made McCain his bitch…He needs to watch and re watch that debate. Also WHOEVER advised him in not bringing up those issues with Romney, 47% etc….needs to either be fired or go take notes from Romney’s camp on how to get aggressive. Or maybe Obama needs to talk to Bill Clinton AGAIN.

    But what I saw last night just made me shake my head. Sometimes I’m thinking maybe he did that on purpose to draw Romney out to see what he would be dealing with and change his strategy for the next 2 debates.

  7. Decider
    October 4, 2012 at 2:03 pm — Reply

    “Sometimes I’m thinking maybe he did that on purpose to draw Romney out to see what he would be dealing with and change his strategy for the next 2 debates.”

    That’s EXACTLY what I was thinking. See what kind of Mittens foolywang you will have to deal with in front of eleventy million people and plan your strategy accordingly. Obama’s going for the rope-a-dope, y’all.

  8. Christie
    October 4, 2012 at 8:51 pm — Reply

    Why is Mitty Boo Boo’s hair boot black except for his sideburns? He looks like he colors his hair himself with a box of Just For Men. When this whole Leader of the Free Wirld thing doesn’t work out, he can be the next host on Family Feud.

  9. Akua
    October 4, 2012 at 9:04 pm — Reply

    “I wanted to yell out “Don’t let them punk you, Jim! SAY IT WIT YOUR CHEST!” But NAWL! They stepped all over Jim like he was the DREAM ACT before 2012″

    I was on my couch, just mad at Jim Lehrer. I wanted him to get some bass in his voice and raise up. He reminded me of Milton from Office Space.

  10. October 5, 2012 at 4:59 pm — Reply

    Ma’am, I’m mad you Mariah-Minaj hyperlink just takes you back to this article. I was ready for some of chuckle (and explanation…I’m SO SO sooo out the loop on pop culture)

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