After last week’s Scandal episode left me in need to pressure pills and sniffs of extra oxygen from Verna’s tank, I was just ready to see what was next. And when I heard that the show was jumping 10 months ahead, I knew Shonda and her team were gon shake every table. This week didn’t leave me rolling around on the floor like last one but it ended and I was unable to can with many questions.
Water Weight – The episode starts off with Olivia in a pool swimming like Michaela Phelps. Seems that she’s tryna work off some thangs!
Shower Shutdown – President Ghost is in the shower (owww) when Mellie walks in the bathroom with a drink he requested. She hands it to him and then joins him. She’s clearly working hard at trying to get him to give her some loving and he looks less than enthused. She heads down south to get on her knees and he shook his head with such fervor that you’d think he’d get whiplash. Maybe Mellie shoulda read Superhead’s book (-_-).
Surprise Bed Gift – David wakes up and realizes he’s holding a bloody knife. He looks next to him and there’s a dead woman who has been stabbed with that same knife and he hops out of bed. HOW THE HELL?!? Who set this poor guy up? As he jumps outta bed, police knock on his door and it takes him a while to open it. When he does, they tell him a neighbor called saying she heard a woman screaming. A nervous David tells them that it might have been his TV being loud. Poor guy was shaking like a polaroid picture until they left his doorway. We know who Liv’s newest client gon be.
Coffee and Flirting – Olivia is standing in line at NotStarbucks when the guy in front of her accidentally knocks her phone out of her hand. He helps her pick it up and once he sees that she’s FAHN and her hair is LAIDT like forgiveness, he starts chatting her up. They trade witty banter and he gives her his phone number. Well, check out Pope getting back in the game.
David Gets the Gladiators – David is no fan of Liv’s but he knows that he needs the Gladiators to come fix the newest mess he’s in. They get on the scene and he says he didn’t kill this woman, whose name is Wendy. But he did sleep with her. Huck notices that his pupils are turned inward and tells him he’s been roofied. Well DAMB. The more you know. It also turns out that since he got fired as State Attorney from failing his last two MAJOR cases, he’s been blacklisted in government. He’s now a high school political science teacher whose granny had to pay his last month’s rent.. AAWWW poor guy! They really did ruin his entire livelihood.
Showing Quinnsey the Ropes – Huck and Quinnsey are left to “clean up” the crime scene after the Gladiators moved Wendy to her own house. Huck gives Quinnsey tips on what to do to make a crime scene not staged, and he gives her the honor of re-stabbing Wendy. When she did it and smiled at him, I got worried. But Huck’s almost orgasmic face at seeing her do it made me cackle.
Cyrus Shut Out – President Ghost is taking meetings without letting Cyrus know and it’s clear that Cy is out of his trust circle. And he’s not pleased. And Ghost doesn’t give a damb.
Not Baby Arms – The Gladiators try to figure out who set David up for this murder so they go through Wendy’s cellphone and find hella pics of men’s bodies without their heads visible. She’s clearly run through them. They also use her Facebook posts to figure out where she was when she took the pics. Win. Also a reminder for folks to turn off the geolocation when they post. As they go through the pics, Abby asked a dumb question and Harrison helped her clarify. ”Is that someone’s…?” “Hair baby arm? No.” I AM HERE FOR HARRISON!!!
David Side-eyes Liv – Olivia goes to see David and he accuses her of possibly setting him up as a murderer because of Defiance-gate. I get why he is mad at Liv, because her job of fixing things has thoroughly messed up his life. But he better recognize that she’s the closest thing to a friend that he has.
He Knows – Liv meets up with Cyrus to ask him if he had anything to do with David being set up. Cy says although that isn’t the worst idea he’s heard, it wasn’t him. And then Olivia tells her that she thinks Prez Ghost knows about Defiance, and it dawns on him why he’s been shut out of his confidence for the past 10 months. Before he leaves, she tells him “Defiance is never gonna die.” OOP.
As Melle watches President Ghost playing with “America’s Baby,” Cyrus tells her that Fitz knows about what happens in Defiance, and that’s why he’s shut him and her out. “He’s running the country for real on his own.” Her attempt to deny the possibility fails and she realizes that his obsession with their new baby might be because he’s lost trust in everything else. Oh.
And Cyrus apologizes for making Liv the godmom of him and James’ baby girl.
Pope’s School of Cope – Liv sees Abby in the office looking like a lost kitten and she asks her how she is with the whole David stuff. Abby tells her she’s fine, looking like even she doesn’t believe it. Liv tells her to do “Stuff that numbs you keeps you from thinking too much. It also helps to try to remember that he hates you. Try to hate him too.” Thank you, Ms. Pope for Unhealthy Coping 101!
David Reads for Life – David is arrested as a suspect for Wendy’s death and he’s bailed out. So him and Harrison go to the State Attorney’s office. Before they enter, Harrison tells him to remain silent the entire time and let him do the talking. When they do, David said “eff instructions” and proceeded to READ FOR FILTH! He was in his old office talking to the person who replaced him, telling him how foolish it was for them to think his no criminal background-having self randomly stabbed a woman. Lemony READ like his last name was Leakes and I loved it. Also related, David will be referred to as Lemony Snicket because his life is a series of unfortunate events. You’re welcome.
Meet Pentagon Jake – As the Gladiators go through Wendy’s phone to figure out her connections, one of those is Jake. Liv goes to where Jake works and he’s the guy she met at the coffee shop. And he works at the Pentagon. After their conversation about his connection to Wendy leads to a dead end, he asks her out and she rebuffs him. Chile…
No Country for Cyrus - Fours Americans are being held hostage by terrorists and President Ghost, Cyrus and the rest of their team have to decide on what to do. Fitz says he wants SEALs to be sent there to handle it and he asks him to reconsider and he shoots him down. When they get in private, Cyrus tells him he notices that he’s been shut out and it’s making it hard for him to do his job. Ghost hits him with ”Are you done discussing your hurt feelings?” but then acquiesces and says he’ll wait on pulling the SEAL trigger. You see a little bit of hope come on Cy’s face because he misses the bromance they used to have.
Done with Pope – Lemony tells Olivia that they are done working together because he feels like all her work is to destroy his. He pulls out his checkbook and asks her how much he owes her so they can be done. She says ”You can’t afford me.”
WELP!!! He sure can’t. Didn’t granny pay his rent? Sir… Womp!
Under the Tires – Mellie and Fitz are in a limo when she says she notices he’s been drinking a lot. He looks like her like he couldn’t give half a gram of a damb. Then she brings up Defiance. She tells Ghostie that it was all Cyrus’ idea and he’s right to not trust him. She paints the picture of herself as a choiceless participant and for the first time, she’s offering Ghost something of value. He pulls her hand and kisses it, thinking the devil next to him is the only person he can trust now. That lying wench threw Cyrus under the bus so hard that his face should be on the tires.
The Awkward Ceremony – Having been hardened to Cyrus even more, Prez Ghost shows up at the baby christening and first thing he tells Cy to do is make the call to have the SEALs go in. This was probably partly to drive it to him that he is really no longer in his confidence. And then the christening starts and Olivia and Fitz are holding Ella as she’s christened. NOW I SEE! The lie Mellie told was payback to Cyrus for having Liv and Ghost be that child’s godparents. Oh that shrew!
Closet Freaks – After the ceremony and James and Cyrus are thanking everyone for coming, Liv can no longer stand being in the same room as Fitz so she leaves, walking furiously through the halls and he follows behind her. When he finally catches up, he opens up a closet, shoves her into it and starts playing tonsil hockey with her. She pushes him off… and then sucks his face with all the passion in her little body. And thus began one of the steamiest sex scenes I’ve seen not on HBO or Skinemax!
THEY WERE UP IN THE CLOSET… closet… closet…
I was all DON’T DO THAT BUT YEESSSSSS GET IT IN! And they were at it like two dogs in heat. I was all flummoxed watching it and just like that it was over and I wanted a cigarette and I don’t e’em smoke. CHILE! My jaw was on the floor like Liv’s panties were. (P.S. where was the condom? I mean…)
When they walked out the closet, she said she made a mistake. And he thought it was the sex but she meant Defiance. He told her it wasn’t a mistake, but a betrayal. And then dismissed her with ”I may not be able to control my erections around you but we are done.” WOW WOW WOW. Not cool. NOT. COOL. And here’s also where this dynamic of theirs lately has bothered me. Prez Ghost’s aggressiveness towards Liv is actually starting to bug me because he’s treating her like property. That sex scene was HOT (don’t get me wrong) but this ain’t the first time he HEMMED her up like this. Ghost better get his life in order! But that’s a post all by itself. Moving on…
Presidential Mistake – The Prez, Cyrus and defense team are watching what’s happening with the SEAL mission and they realize that it was a setup. There’s a mole in the White House. SEE? You shoulda listened to your boy! Cy suggests they have an internal investigation and he shuts him down immediately saying “I need to figure out who I can trust.” Sir, you can’t e’em trust yourself!
Lemony’s Sour But Back – Abby goes to David’s place to apologize but he isn’t hearing it, closing the door on her face. OOP. Then he finds a jump drive on the floor of his apartment and brings it to Liv. Turns out that it’s Wendy’s and it includes the classified information she’s found out (possibly related to Jake’s work). He realizes that he does need Liv to fix it because he’d be bad at jail. MMHMM.
Unsexiest Shower Ever – President Ghost is in the shower looking like he should be singing “Another Sad Love Song” by Toni Braxton as he gulps down some dark liquor. Mellie shows up again tryna get chose. This heifer. He turns down another attempt at making him her lollipop (womp) and does it too aggressively. So when she’s slightly shaken, he attempts to fix it by kissing her. Too bad there’s nothing left between the two of them because the kiss was forced, awkward and terrible because who he wants isn’t who he got. *cues “You Got It Bad” by Usher”*
The Liv Pope Show – Olivia calls Jake up and he sounds positively pleased to hear from her, saying he knew she’d call. They agree on a place and date to meet up for what seems like a date and he hangs up and watches his TV screen. WASN’T NO TV SHOW ON THEM SCREENS! IT WAS OLIVIA POPE!!! He was Truman Showing her!
*faints* WHAT. THE. HELL??? He just went from random dude at the Pentagon to her LEGIT stalker! And for this, Jake’s new name is Officer Truman. You’re welcome.
BUT WHO IS HE REALLY? HOW DID HE GET IN HER APARTMENT TO SET THIS UP? THAT MEETING IN THE COFFEE SHOP WASN’T A RANDOM COINCIDENCE, HUH??? WHO IS JAKE WORKING WITH??? WHAT IS HAPPENING?
My CANS just called me and said they missed their flight. My inability to CAN right now is at peak levels. iCan’t. I’m an an emotional rollercoaster!
EVERY TIME we get the answers to our questions they create new ones. DANG IT, SHONDA! *shakes fists* E’em though I won’t have it any other way. And WTF, indeed!
So yeah, discuss.
P.S. Soooo I don’t know how to say this to y’all but I will be missing next week’s episode of Scandal because I’ll be in Nigeria. *wall slides* for missing the ep, and *fist pump* for Naija ratchetness. So I won’t be able to recap it til about February 26. I’ma be so tardy for the party but y’all must deal. I’ma miss you, doe!!!