Kanye, the Pole that Assaulted Him and the Tantrum

[ 29 ] May 11, 2013 |

I know I’ve been talmbout Kanye West and Kim Kardashian a lot but it’s because they keep doing unintentionally hilarious things. Like dressing like couches and looking miserable. Well yesterday, Ye and Kim were headed to a restaurant and were clearly in no mood for paparazzi so they walked with their heads downs. And then… just watch.

Our homeboy hit a pole that was minding its business so hard that the CLANG sound reverberated for seconds. It was the sound heard around the world. And I cackled. I am terrible but this was hilarity. Especially since the sign said “watch for pedestrians.” It shoulda said “Watch for Kanye.”

He had to stand there and get his wits back as Kim (and her church bazaar lace coat with Celie braids) tries to comfort him. It was like the time Peter Griffin hurt himself by the mailbox and spent 45 seconds going “Aaahhhhhh…” HA!

Peter Ouch gif

And Kanye’s first reaction after his ears stopped ringing was to jump at the paparazzi for trying to take his picture. Sir, you shoulda been looking where you were going.

He only barked a little though and him and Kim walked into the restaurant. But Kanye must have realized how truly hurt his feelings were because he came back out to really get froggy with the photographers. He ended up coming for one who wasn’t even there for his original pole accident. Watch below:

You can tell Kanye’s feelings were EXTRA hurt because this is clearly a butthurt reflex. It’s like getting a papercut and being mad at the piece of paper. This tantrum of his…Chile, ok. Bless his heart. He just wanted someone else to feel as bad as he did at the moment.

Kanye must be mad because he got on all that leather in that heat. Ain’t nobody ask him to put on non-breathable fabric in 90 degrees. And those tight pants of his prolly cutting off all types of circulation. He better get his life.

RIP to Kanye West’s dignity, doe. Gone too soon. You will be missed. Death by collision with pole. *pours out a lil moscato*

The man needs some renewed joy in his life. He ain’t been right since Donda passed and I just wanna hug him tight. Hopefully, this baby will bring some light to his life so he can stop looking like someone stole his favorite pleather pants ALLATAHM.

Am I terrible for laughing? What do you think Kanye gotta do to get his life together?

Edit: Because the internet is the worst and best, someone created this graphic and I laughed so hard I hiccuped.

Kanye Hit It First

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  1. Message! - Channing in the City | June 13, 2013
  1. MiMi says:

    He needs a hug or a vacation or something. Pissed at your celebrity? Upset about the invasion of your privacy? Yeah….

  2. dmaclee says:

    Poor tink tink.

  3. Monica says:

    Luvvie, you’re not wrong for laughing because I watched this 3 minutes ago and still having a hearty laugh. IDC that was funny and if I was Kim I would still be laughing. WELP, he’ll be alright once his ego is back intact

    • mizzpicklezz says:

      I thought the same thing! I must be a terrible wife I would have been laughing HARD at my husband!! Trying to get the paparazzi to take a pic of the lump!! I would have taken the pic myself and sent it to the paparazzi–laughing the whole entire time. Hell I would have named the lump “Peter”. That crap was FUNNY!!

  4. I laughed for five minutes straight. Then I hit my pinky toe on the bathroom cabinet this morning. See Karma

  5. Joy says:

    I may have watched him walk into that pole several times. I also may have laughed loudly each time. Has anyone seen the article talking about the “bump” on his forehead? Awesomeness.

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2323060/Grumpy-Kanye-West-sports-ghastly-bump-head-day-embarrassing-signpost-incident.html?ito=feeds-newsxml

    • Candace says:

      I just read that and flatlined. The comments underneath the pictures slayed me.

    • Jazzy says:

      I laughed so hard, I almost couldnt catch my breath. He mad like the pole walked up and hit him!!!!!!!!! That knot is hialrious!!

  6. The Dyv says:

    The bump heard ’round the world had me laughing. The light, tippy toe jog to the camera did too. The tantrum, however makes me miss the cool ‘Ye. He seems *in my Principal Wally from “Bad Teacher” voice” OVERWHELMED.

  7. nichole says:

    You are not terrible for laughing because that would make me terrible too.

    I guess before these two got together they didn’t agree on when and how to handle the paparazzi. That’s the pre-baby agreement they should have made.

    By the way, I saw other pictures from later and it looked like he got in a car (front seat) and took off. Without Kim. She was on the phone after that, probably calling Mama Kris for a ride.

  8. Brittni says:

    Well see nah, God don’t like ugly. That boy better quit actin so stank, next time that pole gon take his whole head off :-|

    Amen, saints?

    Amen.

  9. RozB says:

    How do you get mad at somebody else because YOU are not watching where you’re going?

    “So, a douchebag and his pregnant girlfriend walk into a pole…”

    HAHAHA!!!!!

  10. CJ says:

    Mmmm…um. I have seen many a 6 year old stomp of in that same fashion.

  11. Wait there was a cool Ye? You have to remember that he was the kid who spent hours after school playing with his Korg. (That’s the only way he could get good at what he did). He didn’t get any play from the girls and he grew up angry at the world. Now that he’s become successful he feels he has to get revenge by dating what he sees as the hottest girl in school.

    The thing is…he’s still that nerd in high school no matter how much money he throws at it. Until he’s happy with himself, he’ll always be angry.

    • dmaclee says:

      I agree. He doesn’t seem to have people skills and the only person who truly understood him died. He needs therapy.

  12. Sonya says:

    Kanye stay pissed, moreso now, cause Kim keep the paparazzi on speed dial and he can’t go nowhere without ‘em snapping pics. Pissed off!! I wanna know why they out looking like morticians? That po’ baby! … I have images of Kim as a single/baby mama.

    When I glimpsed at the pic for the 1st video, I see Kim offering him support and thought he was about to break out in a James Brown “Please, please, please” – of course the cape wouldn’t been that lace coverup she wore …. Icantstophollering

  13. JozieGyrl says:

    I ain gon lie. I watched about three times m’self. ROFL. Those two look like the day after New Years ev’ry day. I hope they don’t try to put that baby in black leather or spandex. One last thing…what in de hell is Kim wearing? Why is she channeling Morticia from da Addams family. Girl, bye.

  14. mePHIme says:

    It’s neither polite nor ladylike to laugh at another’s misfortune, whether accidental or intentional. That said, bwahhhahhhaaahahahhhhaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  15. xlovehappyx says:

    I know this comment is shit after such a great post, but I just wanna say I love you. Is that ok? LOL Thanks for making me laugh; Kanye hitting a pole didn’t even make me laugh, it was just what you wrote about Kanye hitting a pole.

  16. 504 says:

    Well….The paparazzi is all in his face. Trying to hid hi face and get away. Probably couldn’t see therefore runs into a pole….. The paps need to chill tho.

  17. mizzpicklezz says:

    LOL!!! HE WAS SO MADD!! XD LOL!! I can’t stop laughing!!

  18. dmaclee says:

    Kim has on Anita Baker’s coat from the Rapture of Love years. Mama ‘Nita has evolved from the black lace so should Kim.

  19. Serenity says:

    I feel NO kind a way about this other than amusement. I was listening to the radio complain that just because they are celebrities doesn’t mean they don’t have the right to privacy. They don’t. You trade privacy for the fame and money

  20. Janaye says:

    I was just telling someone yesterday how he hasn’t been right since his mother passed. That young man is not well. The leather ensemble in May is definitely an indication of the need for counseling.

  21. jynxgirl03 says:

    That last image made me cry! Tomfoolery!

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