Famous folks

Angelina Jolie Gave Maleficent Realness to Amy Pascal and I’m Here For It

By now, you might have heard about how Sony Pictures’ emails were hacked and many of the exchanges between executives were leaked. You thought All My Children was juicy? NOPE! There was so much tea between these film bigwigs, and many sites have published them.

Some of the juiciest tea was from Amy Pascal, Sony’s co-chairman. Emails between her and producer Scott Rudin dropped (yes, like they’re mixtapes or something) and they had some unkind words to say about some of our faves, including Angelina Jolie. In the convo, she was called a “minimally talented spoiled brat.”

UH UH. Don’t come for Mrs. Jolie-Pitt when she ain’t send for you! Anyway, the Hollywood Reporter’s Women in Entertainment Power 100 Breakfast happened a couple of days after the gist drop and Amy ran into Angelina. Apparently, she tried to hug her and this picture happened.

Angelina Jolie and Amy Pascal Meet

From the DailyMail

If looks could kill, we’d be singing “Swing Low, Sweet Chariot” in honor of Amy’s memory. GAHTDAMB. This is not a side-eye. It’s a full-frontal death glare.

Angie is giving Maleficent realness because this lady was just talking grimy about her and is gon try to hug her? Where they do that at? It’s like the time this one known person went around talmbout me to people I KNOW and of course they told me. Then she saw me at an event talmbout “Luvvie, we need to talk.” I believe the look I had on my face resembled Angie’s. We ain’t got nothing to talk about, ma’am. Only thing I NEED to do is stay Black and pay my taxes. Get out my face. Y’all know I’m petty.

Anyway, look at Angelina’s hands too. She’s like “I’m not trying to touch you” as the lady grabs her shoulders. She is so not here for Amy. She’s so un-here for Amy that she’s over there and all around.

This is the look you give to the person who tried to eat your last plate of jollof rice then they come up on you in the kitchen like y’all are friends. NOPE. That is betrayal and you KNOW we ain’t cool. We are not.

You tried it

Amy tried it, doe. TRIED IT. And I love Angie for not doing the fake laugh thing. YESSS to this glare of death!

Oh and the hilarity of the lady in the back with her arms folded. She’s calling Amy’s boolsheet too. She sees it and she ain’t here for it either.

How would y’all caption this pic?

P.S. If you’re reading this, can you please share this post on Facebook? My account is down (womp) so I’m locked out. And I want my FB peeps to know I got some new new!

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77 Comments

  1. December 12, 2014 at 10:33 am

    This post gave me life. But did you see the lady in the middle with her arms folded. Like “Angie I got you, what is she trying to prove.”

    • Dominique
      December 12, 2014 at 10:35 am

      LMAOOOOOOOOOOOO! I didn’t even notice the 3rd woman! She is like, “You need backup? Because I’m outchea. I said, I AM RIGHT HERE AND READY!”

      • Simone
        December 14, 2014 at 10:21 pm

        I’m crine!!

        • Rhombus
          December 15, 2014 at 2:51 am

          WTF is I’m crine??? – is that a medical conditions or what?

          • Lauryn Trill
            December 19, 2014 at 4:37 am

            Uuuuhhh…….I see you’re new here…We have our lingo here…Please direct yourself to a corner and familiarize yourself….

    • notconvincedgranny
      December 12, 2014 at 3:10 pm

      You know the saying “don’t call for bail, call for backup”? Girl was already there, no need to yell.

  2. emv1102
    December 12, 2014 at 11:04 am

    I would have loved to see video of the exchange as soon as Amy let go. Have they forgotten the former Mrs. Billy Bob Thorton is crazy. Do they not remember she used to wear a vial of blood around her neck? All the kid adopting in the world couldn’t erase that and they gon’ shoot emails back and forth about Angelina like that? Naw, somewhere Amy is about to be updating her resume. Angelina prolly got all KINDS of strings to pull. I can’t wait to see how this Sony stuff plays out. It’s interesting to me, people who’ve made them a ton of money and they’re name calling like some twisted pre-schoolers, making racist remarks and such. I wouldn’t be surprised if the Sony empire crumbles. #willbesittingandwatching

    • Autumn Grey Midhir
      December 12, 2014 at 3:22 pm

      All of what you said. People seem to forget that whatever else Jolie is, she’s 100% really Real Jolie. She might be batsh!t crazy (or not) but she’s not a faking Faker. No, Faux Hugger. You just back yourself right on up.

  3. Angela H
    December 12, 2014 at 11:07 am

    The lady in the back is looking just like those wings in Maleficent. Just waiting for Angie to give her a look so she can put me on!

    • Tammey
      December 13, 2014 at 10:01 am

      OMG! Not the wings! That gave me a visual and I saw the big wings beating frantically, trying to get out and reattach. LMFAO!!!!

  4. December 12, 2014 at 11:10 am

    I think Angie just cast a spell on her. She prolly didn’t even speak a word… she just stared into that lady’s soul and floated away. I’m here for it.

  5. December 12, 2014 at 11:45 am

    This look on the face of the classy Ms. Jolie-Pitt to me says:

    “UN-SMILING FACES”

    or perhaps just

    “UNSUBSCRIBE”

    as in, to Ms. Pascal’s public persona.

  6. December 12, 2014 at 11:49 am

    I’m hollering at the woman in the back too. She looks like this biotch here! And Angelina’s face is basically cracking the other lady’s face. Next picture was her with a face!!

    • December 12, 2014 at 11:50 am

      I meant without a face damn it!!

  7. mzmiami
    December 12, 2014 at 12:23 pm

    Serve face Mrs. Jolie-Pitt!!! I love it!!!

  8. Toya Hankins
    December 12, 2014 at 12:48 pm

    It’s like she is looking past her at someone that really matters. Respect the Oscar/UN ambassador/Zahara’s mother

  9. Camilleblu
    December 12, 2014 at 1:02 pm

    I mean…Angelina’s face just looks like bish, whet?!

  10. Tristan
    December 12, 2014 at 1:23 pm

    Angelina is like: “Just because there are ppl here and cameras are clicking, don’t mean I won’t end you. Let go. Now.”

    Angie’s backup: “Smack her. Just smack that forgetful Heiffer, Jolie. And snatch that hair hat.”

    I’d probably caption this photo: “Oh, you forgot already? Lemme help you remember.”

  11. December 12, 2014 at 1:37 pm

    They done forgot that Mrs. Angie is crazy. Do t let her goodwill ambassadorship’s fool ya. She will go left real quick lol

  12. Dee
    December 12, 2014 at 1:48 pm

    I’m gonna call the lady in the back Kermit…..

    • Kawira
      December 13, 2014 at 12:25 am

      Lol! Amen!! Except, now it IS Kermit’s business

  13. December 12, 2014 at 1:53 pm

    Man,

    Forget her eyes, I’m staring at her HANDS. I’m either waiting for her drop a death spell or claw at her face. Take your pic…..

    • December 12, 2014 at 2:01 pm

      Sorry I meant HAND, I don’t even know where the other hand is, she might be reaching for a bottle…..

  14. December 12, 2014 at 1:54 pm

    One word caption: NOPE

  15. December 12, 2014 at 1:56 pm

    The lady in the back is like “ain’t this some bullshit?!”.

    This is a “stop we ain’t friends” picture. The kind of look that makes you want to run out and buy popcorn and a lawn chair. This is “tell me again how you’re happy to see me?”.

    Angie wins the full frontal death stare award for 2014.

  16. December 12, 2014 at 2:00 pm

    Caption “Brad and I just bought controlling shares of Sony. You’re fired. Who’s your daddy now, Bish?”

  17. JazzT
    December 12, 2014 at 2:07 pm

    That woman in the back steals this pic for me! She lookin like “I’ll be here when you ready to tag me in.”

    This Amy chick is looking like Gemma Teller (for the SoA fans out there) which makes it that more funny to me. Cause Gemma stayed on that BS.

    • RonicaOne
      December 12, 2014 at 2:24 pm

      The lady in the back—I’m thinking flying monkeys from Oz waiting for the flag to go down to pounce.

      • JazzT
        December 12, 2014 at 3:28 pm

        Haaaaaaaa! YES! On a moment’s notice.

  18. December 12, 2014 at 2:17 pm

    i think angie must have just gotten her nails did because i could see her breaking amy’s face with her fists even with cameras flashing *anyway* … but not wanting to break a nail while doing so.

  19. Lady~O
    December 12, 2014 at 2:19 pm

    Joleen = Lady in the back =
    You know you done fucked up now? Right?

  20. December 12, 2014 at 2:27 pm

    That lady in the back is giving the best side eyed, side lipped “I wish you would” GRIT I have ever seen. She almost look like a black mother in the choir when her children are talking in the back of the church glare. She is giving me life on this here one.

    And Angelina is NOT even remotely here for it. I think she probably wants to tell her to kiss her tail if the camera man hadn’t been so close.

  21. December 12, 2014 at 2:27 pm

    Angie: “I ain’t dressed so fancy I can’t cut a bitch.”

  22. Sane Jane
    December 12, 2014 at 2:56 pm

    That’s Amy Pascal Angie is talking too? Ah dang, I thought it was Severus Snape….

    • Sane Jane
      December 12, 2014 at 2:58 pm

      I meant talking to! 😀

    • MoMo
      December 12, 2014 at 7:59 pm

      ^^^^^^Yesssssss!!!!!!!

  23. cleojonz
    December 12, 2014 at 3:08 pm

    You clearly found yourself here accidentally. Why bother to respond at all if you aren’t on the topic at hand but on the style. She is writing in a style. This is an entertainment blog not a print publication’s blog. There is no need to be that serious ALL the damn time. It’s all in fun, lighten up.

    • cleojonz
      December 12, 2014 at 3:11 pm

      I wrote this in response to a troll post I saw above, but I don’t see it anymore. Oh well, nothing to see here. Carry on.

  24. cleojonz
    December 12, 2014 at 3:10 pm

    My post above was directed at some troll trying to crack on luvvie’s writing style, but I don’t see it anymore. Carry on.

    • Tristan
      December 12, 2014 at 4:50 pm

      Ohhhhhh cause I read your comments and I thought you was outchea coming for people who didn’t send for ya!!!!

  25. notconvincedgranny
    December 12, 2014 at 3:13 pm

    Why is Angelina looking like “Jesus, when did these things acquire speech, and why is it talking to me?”

  26. December 12, 2014 at 3:14 pm

    “Well, well, well…”

  27. Matt
    December 12, 2014 at 3:23 pm

    The way you type words to reflect your broken dialect is really stupid. “Talmbout”? Really? Not cute, just ignorant.

    • MzQuinn
      December 12, 2014 at 3:41 pm

      You are dismissed.

    • Gingersnap
      December 12, 2014 at 4:06 pm

      Obviously you’re not a regular reader of this blog. We’ll forgive snide remarks once. So…FYI: “Talmbout” is a term many of us here in Luvv Nation use frequently. It denotes a level of absurdity that proper English does not. Go to the home page and learn the glossary. Or don’t and make another remark like that and see what happens. You’ve been warned.

      • Matt
        December 12, 2014 at 5:06 pm

        Oh, goodness. I would just hate to see what would happen if I were to make another remark like that. Your comment has successfully intimidated me to the point that I will cower away and never return to this page again.

        lol.

        • notconvincedgranny
          December 12, 2014 at 9:38 pm

          Well, since you are about as useful as tits on a bullfrog, you should slip slide away. Cower indeed, as cowardice would be apropos for you and your ilk – and do it before we send Angelina for you.

    • Michele
      December 12, 2014 at 4:24 pm

      Let me guess. You’re also the type that would tell somebody that their their decor is crappy while you’re a guest in their home.

      Bless your heart.

      • Matt
        December 12, 2014 at 5:02 pm

        Thanks for guessing! Unfortunately, quite wrong. I do my best to act, present myself, and speak properly. However, this blog is not a good comparison to someone’s private home that I was invited to. This is a public blog that apparently anyone can comment on and, therefore, I will comment.

        • mak
          December 12, 2014 at 11:04 pm

          Matt, yours is a prime example of a little knowledge – and I do mean a little – being a dangerous thing.
          Consider that Mark Twain, considered by many to be the greatest America writer, ever, earned this accolade due largely to his ability to write in an inventive vernacular unique at the time.
          As an English professor, I consider Luvvie to be among the finest, if not the finest, practitioners of that great writing tradition. “Talmbout” is pure genius, as are “Wayment,” “Ratchet,” and “Nawl,” to name but a few.
          Luvvie’s locutions have become part of the American lexicon. I read her writing for the sole purpose of enjoying her written inventions. It’s a shame your world is so small that you are trapped into believing there is only one way to properly skin a cat. .
          So perhaps it is time for you to Saddown and Sharrup.

        • mak
          December 12, 2014 at 11:16 pm

          And by the way, if you really did your best “to act, present [yourself] and “speak properly,” you would not butcher the language with grotesque alleged sentences like “However, this blog is not a good comparison to someone’s private home that I was invited to.” Aside from being grammatically mangled in at least three different ways, that word salad is painful to read. You wouldn’t be related to Sarah Palin, would you?

          • Elle
            December 13, 2014 at 8:47 am

            mak

            Your responses were so eloquently on point and truthful, that they brought tears to my eyes and joy to my heart!

            The Truth has been spoken people. Don’t come for us, unless we send for you.

            #LuvvieNation
            #BishWhet
            #BlessHisHeart
            #ShadeLevelExpert

    • Emti
      December 12, 2014 at 11:08 pm

      Awwwwww it’s a newbie…can we pet him?

      • Tristan
        December 13, 2014 at 7:32 am

        he needs petting. Who sent him?

      • notconvincedgranny
        December 13, 2014 at 2:36 pm

        If by “pet” you mean harness and whip like a levee camp mule, then yes.

  28. Absurdist
    December 12, 2014 at 3:56 pm

    That was delicious.

    But I’m definitely here for some of the ish they had to say about Adam Sandler.

  29. Shay_lafemme
    December 12, 2014 at 5:27 pm

    What is that over Angelina’s shoulder? Is that a taser?

  30. December 12, 2014 at 6:03 pm

    Two word caption: BITCH PLEASE

  31. goldenkayo
    December 12, 2014 at 7:50 pm

    Miss Angelina had the LAMK (Let a M’effa Know) look without speaking a word! It gave me life….

  32. notconvincedgranny
    December 12, 2014 at 9:39 pm

    Angelina should have given her a big. ass. bear. hug – she has chicken pox.

  33. Chichi
    December 13, 2014 at 12:09 am

    Kermit, as someone has so aptly nicknamed her, looks like she’s thinking “Look at this fake heifer”. And don’t you think Amy sort of came in to try and immobilize Jolly? Looks like an attempted “I can explain” death grip she got there.

  34. Kawira
    December 13, 2014 at 12:15 am

    Even Amy’s thumbs know better and are already retreating from Jolie. Probably screaming to the other fingers “pull back! Pull back! This is a suicide mission! We are not safe here!!”. Not even trying to touch Mrs Angie. Leaning aaaaalllll the way back like bitch we see her face – we aint touching that. Amy outchea all dismantled and dazed and confused. What happens when you stare death in the face.

    I’m done

  35. Mark Laurent
    December 13, 2014 at 4:35 am

    Angelina was thinking….

    “BYE FELICIA!!”

  36. T
    December 13, 2014 at 6:07 am

    Caption:

    “I don’t like that bitch. I don’t see her.”

  37. ToneNotTony
    December 13, 2014 at 10:51 am

    Caption:

    Angie: “If this bish don’t unhand me!”

    Kermit: “Just say the word, Angie. JUST. SAY. THE . WORD! And Imma windmill on this bish face!”

  38. Mary Burrell
    December 13, 2014 at 2:48 pm

    Yeah, she tried it. And yeah Angelina is giving Malificent realness indeed. Talk about throwing rocks and hiding her hand. Amy Paschal is a dirty witch.

  39. Hope
    December 13, 2014 at 4:27 pm

    That look was every bit of Menace 2 Society’s Detective interrogation of Cain when he went there with the “you know you done phucked up right?….hehehe….you know you done phucked up”

  40. December 13, 2014 at 7:30 pm

    The body language! The death stare! Then the Tamar gif right after. Lmao! #thisisperfect

  41. December 14, 2014 at 12:09 am

    This is a master class in shade people – you don’t run across this level of expertise every day so pay attention.

    This broad knows that she was wrong, so the smart thing to do would be to apologize and keep your distance instead being all up on someone trying to explain. I hate for people to get up in my face even when I am not salty with them much less some fool who was trash talking me. And what is with her grabbing onto Angelina’s arms like that? It is way too aggressive.

    The lady in the background with her arms folded is just waiting for Angelina to say that word before she sets it all the way off. I would love to have heard the audio of that exchange and whatever was said right afterwards.

    • OHR
      December 14, 2014 at 10:29 am

      Agreed. It’s like ol’ girl thought that by putting her hands on Angie would be proof that she’s sincerely sorry. Nope. Angie ain’t havin’ that.

  42. JAFRIQUE
    December 15, 2014 at 12:52 am

    I just came here to say #teamjennifer! Lol

    • beee
      December 15, 2014 at 9:41 am

      It has been a DECADE…………….

      • December 16, 2014 at 1:32 am

        they still see everything as a competition between Mrs Angie and the ex lol

    • December 16, 2014 at 1:27 am

      Jennifer who???? lol #ijot

  43. Mandy
    December 16, 2014 at 11:50 am

    I’m so sure that “minimally talented” Angelina went home and wiped her tears with her Oscar, her Golden Globes, and Brad’s hair.

    BYE AMY.