Recent Articles

Robin Thicke’s Album “Paula” Flops and Goes Toothpick in the UK and Paper Towel in the US

[ 41 ] July 11, 2014 |
Robin Thicke’s Album “Paula” Flops and Goes Toothpick in the UK and Paper Towel in the US

Robin Thicke released his newest album Paula last week and this week, we find out that it only sold 530 copies in the UK. That album went toothpick. Or tinfoil. And in the US, it sold 25,000 copies. At least it went a bit better, going paper towel. I haven’t listened to it so I […]

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The #TweetLikeJadenSmith Hashtag Brought Me Cackles

[ 25 ] July 10, 2014 |
The #TweetLikeJadenSmith Hashtag Brought Me Cackles

Jaden Smith is always worried, as I’ve written about before. His foreheads stays in a perma-wrinkle, as if his family isn’t Hollywood royalty, and as if he’s done nothing but struggle all his life. He’s the hipsterest hipster that ever hipstered. Also, we’ve learned that Jaden is full of thoughts so deep that logic doesn’t […]

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A T-Shirt For Those Of Us Who Were Once People Persons

[ 5 ] July 8, 2014 |
A T-Shirt For Those Of Us Who Were Once People Persons

Sometimes, people suck. And they make you wish they’d go away. Yesterday, I posted a Facebook status saying “I was once a people person. Until people ruined that.” Who knew there were so many fellow cranky folks? It got shared over 1,000 times on my FB fan page and folks said they wanted it on […]

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3 Lessons From the Potato Salad Kickstarter Campaign That’s Raised Over $22,000

[ 31 ] July 7, 2014 |
3 Lessons From the Potato Salad Kickstarter Campaign That’s Raised Over $22,000

There’s a KickStarter campaign for potato salad and it’s made over $22,000. A guy posted a campaign on Kickstarter about how he wants to make potato salad and he set the goal to $10. Well, he’s now raised $22,500 (as of 3pm CST on July 7, 2014) with 25 days left. 1,750 people have contributed to this campaign, […]

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Whose Sharpie Ink Beard is This?

[ 52 ] July 7, 2014 |
Whose Sharpie Ink Beard is This?

The internet is the den of iniquity. Why? Because I find things like this: My dude. MY. DUDE. What is that??? Is that an inked on beard? How does one go to the barbershop and ask for a beard that looks like someone glued black construction paper on your face? Your goal is life should […]

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Because Sometimes, Parents Name Their Kids Weirdly

[ 172 ] July 3, 2014 |
Because Sometimes, Parents Name Their Kids Weirdly

A couple of years ago, I wrote a post about how parents sometimes name their kids foolishly. 640 comments later, it is still one of my favorite posts ever, as folks shared stories of the strangest names they’ve come across. I took a stroll down memory lane last night on Twitter and folks sent me […]

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About The Time I Staged a Mini Sit-In To Get My Money

[ 18 ] July 2, 2014 |
About The Time I Staged a Mini Sit-In To Get My Money

This freelancing life ain’t easy, man. Contractors and non-traditional employees know how that 1099 struggle is real. Net30 and Net45 is the devil but we just gotta deal with it because it’s either we wait orrrrr just don’t do any work and get put out. So we wait. It sucks too because waiting 2-3 months […]

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Come Celebrate My Blog’s Birthday at My Awesomely Golden Party in Chicago!

[ 9 ] July 1, 2014 |
Come Celebrate My Blog’s Birthday at My Awesomely Golden Party in Chicago!

My peoples! On August 8, 2006 I launched this website. Back then it was called “Luvvie’s Random Rants” and I had just graduated from college. I felt like I had outgrown my Xanga blog (remember Xanga?) so I moved to Blogger, shut down my old blog that I had for three years and the rest is […]

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The Fired Nanny Who Won’t Leave: The Real Life Consuela from Family Guy

[ 113 ] June 27, 2014 |
The Fired Nanny Who Won’t Leave: The Real Life Consuela from Family Guy

You hire an older woman to help you watch your kids in exchange for her living in your house. Two weeks after she’s living with you, she disappears for hours in her room, leaving your kids unattended and you frustrated. Just in case you didn’t make yourself clear enough, you write her a note with […]

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The Beloved Sony Walkman and the Cassette Tape Struggle: Throwback Thursday

[ 21 ] June 26, 2014 |
The Beloved Sony Walkman and the Cassette Tape Struggle: Throwback Thursday

Before you could fit 10,000 songs on a device the size of tic tac container, us 80s babies had the Sony Walkman and double-sided cassette tapes. The Walkman was a rite of passage and when you got it (after begging and saving and whining), you felt like you had truly arrived at cool. Yes, yall. […]

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Lupita Nyong’O’s Lancome Ad Won’t Kill Me Die! LOVE!

[ 28 ] June 25, 2014 |
Lupita Nyong’O’s Lancome Ad Won’t Kill Me Die! LOVE!

Somebody gotta tell Lupita Nyong’o that I don’t have time for her perpetual slayage because how am I supposed to get work done and feel good about myself when she’s walking around looking like perfection? I DON’T HAVE THE TAHM NOR THE ENERGY, LAWD! Just look at Lupie’s first ad as an ambassador for Lancome […]

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Because You Need 75 New Ways To Say “Fix It, Jesus”

[ 69 ] June 23, 2014 |
Because You Need 75 New Ways To Say “Fix It, Jesus”

Phaedra Parks of Real Housewives of Atlanta blessed us all with her concern during one of the RHOA reunion shows. Kenya Moore the Terrible and Porsha Williams the Simple were arguing when Anointed Attorney Parks shook her head and said “Fix It, Jesus,” winning the show and giving us a new term to overuse. Bless […]

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About Political Correctness, Inclusion and My Frustration With It All

[ 71 ] June 22, 2014 |
About Political Correctness, Inclusion and My Frustration With It All

There was a rant on my spirit this afternoon and I tweeted it out. I was thinking about making it a real cohesive post but nahhh Storify will have to do. I could explain myself more and go into details on some of what I said but meh. There’s a larger post coming from me […]

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