Awesomely Luvvie » Celebration

Who’s That on the Birthday Line? It’s LUVVIE!!!

Luvvie — Wed, 05 Jan 2011 14:30:41 +0000

Today is a special day! It’s MY BIRTHDAY!!! *and then I hit my dougie*

YES MA’AMS and SIRS! Today’s my birthday! *cartwheels* 26 years ago, the world got a tad bit more ratchet, when at 2:30am, my mama birthed me. TWO weeks late. CLEARLY, I wasn’t on much then either. I was in the womb CHILLING. Shoo…

Me and my Mama on my 3rd birthday. Thank the Lord I grew into my forehead. And leave my zebra print outfit alone. And I'm not sure why I was mean mugging.

I’m so excited. I’m not sure why, because I typically don’t do toooo much on my birthday. But this year, I’m celebrating ME. But more than ever, I’m celebrating the person I’ve become. And the person I continue to grow into. I’m celebrating 26 years of a life lived with no regrets, and looking forward to decades and decades more.

That and I just need a reason for people to buy me Bailey’s Irish Cream. Can’t buy me Bailey’s? Feels free to drop a coupla Dereon dollars into my PayPal (email: Luvvieblog at gmail dot com) if you want to. I’m saying… it’s a recession in these streets. No pressure #doe.

Antywho, so I created a little birthday with list.

Some of them are:

World Peace

Lil Duval to get off Twitter – I still owe y’all that post on why I hate him

Price of oil to go down below “WTF” level – GOLD is probably cheaper than oil now. Shoo…

Lance Gross to appear on my doorstep – He is FAHNER than 1,000 count Egyptian cotton bedsheets. LAWD!!! He will forever be on my “can cheat with” list.

My first pair of Christian Louboutins – I’m saying #doe. I LOVE shoes. And don’t own any of these yet. Doggone recession!

Red velvet fried chicken – YES LAWD!!! Hypertension be dambed!

Random birds to stuff falling out the sky – Yeah, these are just creepy

To find out Soulja Boy is just a prank. Yes. His entire person – He sucks that much

To whip my hair #bagginfoaf with Willow Smith – It’d just be totally awesome.

For Tyrese to hire me to ghosttweet for him – Bless him heart. Yes. HIM heart

For Kim Kardashian to drop this whole becoming a singer thing – Ashanti can’t get NO love from folks but y’all wanna give Kim K a record deal. Some shits ain’t right

Every season of “In Living Color” on DVD. – Then I can indulge in all the Cephus and Reesie I want. WIN

Tumblr to stop crashing ever hour. Fail whale musta moved neighborhoods

I mean, am I asking for too murch? TELL ME! I prolly won’t get any of that. But I’ll settle for if y’all pass on my blog link to 10 people today. That’ll be a GREAT present.

But yes, I’ma be running the streets today. Lemme go do something to this hair of mine though. Can’t be looking all rough on my born day (but those other 364 days of the year? Psht. I’ll put on a leopard onesie and jordan’s. Ok not really. But still…).

But before I go…

YESSSS!!! Get some Brother Franklin in your lives! And this is a NEW vid of him. Yes. THAT is a birthday dance, if I ever saw one.

Follow me on Twitter. Join me on Facebook. Check out my Shoe Blog.

Awesomely Luvvie is 4! Let’s Celebrate!

Luvvie — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 13:00:24 +0000

Awesomely Luvvie is FOUR YEARS OLD!!!

*takes swig of Bailey’s*
*Sheneneh hip twurk*

Four years ago, I abandoned my Xanga blog to move to Blogspot. On August 8, 2006, I wrote the first post on “Luvvie’s Queendom” (LAME NAME!). That blog became “Luvvie’s Random Rants” and then evolved to the Chateau de Ratchetness that is now “Awesomely Luvvie.” 1 blogging platform move (Blogger to WordPress), 1 URL change, 4 years, 370 posts and thousands of comments later, here we are. Although I barely blogged the first 2 years. in fact, only 25 out of those 370 posts were before August 2008. So I was clearly playing bald-headed games those first 2 years!

Now that Awesomely Luvvie is now in Pre-Kindergarten, it has opinions and chooses its own outfits. It has a favorite Dr. Seuss book (“Cat in the Hat”) that it likes to read at night. And a favorite starburst color (the pink one). These four years have been the most rewarding of my life, and I have my blog to thank for a good amount of it.

And I must thank my readers too. Everyone who has read my writing, commented, retweeted it, forwarded it, emailed me with kind words. EVERYONE! You really do make blogging a blast and a half. To thank you folks, I’m having giveaways all week! 4 giveaways (1 for each year of my blog). I’m about to get my LuvPrah on. So this is the week to make sure you’ve subscribed. My giveaways are usually pretty time-sensitive so folks miss out on stuff. This is my alert though. EVERY day, is a different giveaway.

With that being said, the first one is one I’ve been holding on to for a while. I’m giving y’all 4 days to get this done though. And it is…

THE WALL SLIDE SPOTLIGHT!!!

*crowd goes wild*
*crowd stops and says “Wait WHAT?”

Well, as you all know. I’m overdramatic. And this is obvious in my love of *WALL SLIDING*. What is the *wall slide*? I can show you better than I can tell you. And I did.

A *wall slide* is what you do when things get frustrating, overwhelming or just too stressful for you. So naturally, I *WALL SLIDE* at everything, from the loss of an earring to my favorite TV show being cancelled (Bye “Scrubs” ).

So, I’d like my readers to create a video of THEIR version of the *wall slide*. You’ve seen me slide down the wall. Now it’s your turn! The rules are simple, and here they are:

* Create a video of you doing the *WALL SLIDE*. Either the front or the back version.

* The video needs to mention AwesomelyLuvvie.com (either verbally or in a caption).

* It needs to be uploaded somewhere online that is publicly accessible (like YouTube or Vimeo. For those who don’t have an account with either, you can upload the video on TinyPic.com I believe, without an account).

* It needs to be uploaded by 11:59pm on Thursday, August 26, 2010.

* After you upload it, email me the link (Luvvieblog at gmail dot com) of where the video is at and include your name and email address.

The winner of this contest wins a *WALL SLIDE* t-shirt from my Spreadshirt Shop in their size as well as public acclaim for their foolishness. I can create a guy’s *wall slide* tee too, so fellas, don’t feel left out. You can ALSO bust out your best slide.

So get to it, folks! Who’s entering? I hope more than 1 person.

P.S. Also, wishing AFROBELLA.com a HAPPY 4th birthday!!! That dope eCrib turned 4 on August 14th. LEO BLOGS STAND UP!

*crip walks all over your monitor in a party hat*

BlogHer, Here I Come!

Luvvie — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 16:00:00 +0000

So I was at work the other week minding my own business like I usually do (O__O) when I received an email with from BlogHer (biggest female blogging community in the country). I opened the email to see an invitation from them to me to speak on a Humor Writing panel at this year’s conference.

Me: *falls out chair* Wait what? *closed email* *reopened and reread to make sure I read correctly the first time* *exclaims* WHATTT???

The line ”We hope that you are interested” was in this email. Am I interested? AM I INTERESTED??? Does Mariah Carey like spandex? Is Ashanti hairy? Was Ron Burgundy trapped in a glass case of emotions??? Does Ricky Bobby wake up and piss excellence? HAYELL. YES!

I couldn’t respond back fast enough. I didn’t want to send them back an email that would show that I lacked ALL sense and was cheesing like a cheshire cat. I wanted to reply with “iLIVE!!! *does Bro Franklin*” but I thought better.

So I composed myself and crafted a very sensible reply, saying “This sounds like an AWESOME (for lack of a better word) opportunity. I’m definitely interested in speaking on this panel at BlogHer. I’ll just do a silent jig at my desk at work.” *Please insert applause here for maintaining some semblance of sense*

I’m Speaking!!! *faints*

Then I got my Speaker’s Agreement and sent it back yesterday. Once I got the green light to make it public, I was on Twittah hollering it from the rooftops and acting up. Doing all types of inappropriate twurks and church scoots. I did a joyful *WALL SLIDE* and errthang.

Lil ol’ ME? Speaking at BlogHer? You mean itttt??? *Thug on floor* :’-)

BlogHer is HUGE! Last year, registration sold out in 2 months, and some folks who wanted to go had to settle for the “Lobby Conference” which meant you paid to hang out in the lobby and take in the awesomeness of the surroundings and the people. I was one of those people. To go from that to speaking? I’m FLOORED! It’s like the Rose Bowl of Blogging, and I’m a starter. Like TGIF way back in the day, and I’m the 7:30 show. Like Saturday morning cartoons, and I’m SchoolHouse Rock AND New Kids on the Block.

I’m so excited and surprised that they deemed me worthy to be on a panel. So yes. I shall be at BlogHer ’10 in NYC on August 6 & 7. I’ll be the one in Red Pumps and acting a fool. You can’t miss me.

eBailey’s for EVERYONE! This is a partayyy! Ow owwwww!

It’s my birthday!!! Let us rejoice!

Luvvie — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 06:00:00 +0000

One score and five years ago, my mother (and I guess my daddy) brought forth on this planet, a new daughter, conceived in awesomeness and dedicated to the proposition that she shall wake up and piss excellence, phoenix feathers and unicorn tears.

This is all to say, IT’S MY BIRTHDAY!!!

*drops down and gets my eagle on*
*twurks inappropriately*
*crip walks*
*does the Bro Franklin*

Woo hoo!!! As if I needed an excuse to party. But yes, it is my big 2-5. I no longer have to pay extra fees to rent a car (if I drove). And umm… hmmm… I think that’s the only extra perk to being 25 as opposed to 24. But I’ll take it. In honor of the occasion, I decided to make a list of presents y’all could get me.

25 things I want for my birthday
——————————————–
1. For Tiger Woods to never appear shirtless on a cover unless he waxes his nipple hair. Don’t nobody wanna see that hairy areola of his. He is TOO rude for that! Why does he think it’s okay to have mini coconuts sitting on his chest? Hell, at quick glance, his nipples looked like roaches. iSquealed.

b. A kente snuggie. Who doesn’t need to be warm while rocking a backwards blanket in a cliched African print. Besides, “Harambe” sounds more powerful when done while donning one of these O__o.

3a. An apology from Chris Brown for his burnt sienna apology blouse. Yeah, I’ve been waiting for a while

IV. A condom company to sponsor Lil Wayne. No seriously. I’m ’bout sicka him and his ghetto twins (children born in the same year to the same father, different mother). I feel like Trojan oughta buy the rights to tattoo their logo on Weezy and follow him around with a box of magnums so he could be safe while partaking in HoSh*t.

5. Idris Elba on my doorstep (you don’t mind, do ya?). We’d just, you know, talk over wine (O__o). As we waxed philosophical about… anything. I just wanna hear his British accent. Plus he’s FAHN!

6h. Amber Rose’s body. Nobody would be able to tell me NOTHING about myself. I’d be walking around with super attitude, wondering why mere mortals had the galls to speak to me. If my body was like Amber’s, I’d walk around with nothing but body paint on & tell folks to call me Mystique

g. For Nigerians to stay out the news for just a little bit. We need to go saddown for a quick minute. We’ve been showing our ASSES (figuratively and literally) lately.

VIII. Any pair of Naughty Monkey shoes. 7.5 please! iLove them!!

9. Things on my Amazon WishList (yes, you can order stuff off it and Amazon will ship it to me. Thanks in advance. Love you much!!!!)

10. For you to tell them that it’s Human Nature. That’s Why. *WALL SLIDES* Why did you have to go, Kang Miko??!??

XI. For Chicago to stop treating me so bad. Single digit temperature? REALLY??? RUDE!!!

12d. World Peace

Mkay, all I want are those 12 things. See? I’m not greedy. I would have added a dereon onesie to my list but I thought that was a given. I could have changed the name of the list too. But no, I kept it.

*crickets*
*blank stare*

It’s aight. Y’all ain’t gotta *sniff* get me *sniff* nothing. I’m only your favorite blogger’s favorite Luvvie and stuff. Hehe just kidding. LOVE Y’ALL! You reading my blog is a great gift. (No, but really. What y’all get me?)

A girl can dream of rocking such a dress on her birthday, can’t she? It’s winter so I’m in a sweater. But I can still maintain my segzy

So yeah. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!!

P.S. Chicago folks, I’mo be hanging at Plush Lounge after work (6-9pm). Come take a swig of Bailey’s with me to celebrate!

P.P.S. CAPRICORNS ROCK! See: Jesus. #CheckMate

Nigerian Parties are the BEST

Luvvie — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 14:00:00 +0000

Nigerians love to party. We come up with parties for everything. A child is born? Yorubas have a naming ceremony when he/she is 7 days old. This often comes with a naming part and a party following it, with or without the actual baby present. In fact, it’s best if the baby isn’t there. Tuesday? Let’s pop some Bailey’s because it’s the day after Monday. We party for ANY reason. But our parties are THE BEST. If you haven’t been to a Nigerian party before, befriend a Nigerian and make them take you to one.

The party I’m describing below aren’t the ones we have at the club. They are the ones where folks are wearing native.

Why are our parties so AWESOME?

*They are NEVER on a small scale. I’ve never seen someone have a “quaint” party. Our parties can have 300-800 people invited, easily. We are no strangers to renting big halls. And it’ll be for something random too, like a 37th birthday. o__O
True story: When my Granny had her 60th birthday celebration in Nigeria, she shut down 3 blocks for 2 straight days because of it. Had a total of 4 cakes. AND had the most popular Nigerian singer (and an icon) sing live. It was Ebenezer Obey (that’s like having Luther Vandross serenade you for 4 hours). It was THAT serious. We does it SO big.

*People come dressed in their BEST. For most Nigerian parties, people are dressed to THE NINES! You haven’t seen G’ed up til you go to a Naija party and see 30 people rocking the same material clothing all in different styles. The women in elaborate headties (called geles) and the men in their long robes (agbadas). These outfits could cost up to $500 too, between buying the material, headtie and getting them sewn by your seamstress (Sidenote: Every Nigerian has a seamstress. Shoutouts to Abena on Wilson!)

Oh, and the person throwing the party will often change 2-4 times. Calculate that. Yeah Gucci what? PSHT!

Even the babies get their outfits made too. (My sis & my niece)

*We spray money. When people dance at Naija parties, they get sprayed money. What do I mean by “spray?” I mean, people literally make it rain on your head. We were the original folks that made it rain, while others make it drizzle lightly. Everyone comes to a formal Naija party with purses and pockets full of singles because you have to spray people as they dance. And you will get sprayed too.

The people who are throwing the party get sprayed the most though. They get sprayed so much that they usually need 2-3 people designated to picking up their money from the floor. This can end up meaning they take 3-4 trashbags FULL of money home. Money money money money… MONAY!!!

I ain’t gon lie. I may go to a party and not feel like dancing. But let the spraying start, best believe I’m 2-stepping my way to the dance floor and doing some jigs. I danced for 10 minutes once and walked away with $50. KACHING!

*We party til 6 in the morning. LITERALLY. Nigerian parties are known to last until 6 or 7am. This is typical. Remember how I said we can’t be on time for nothing? Well, we get to parties at 1am and kick it until 6am.

So yeah. Nigerian birthdays, weddings, memorials (yes, even those) are events to be at. We’re a flashy people so we definitely take them the extra mile. Oh and in case you were wondering why I like Bailey’s Irish Cream so much… well you won’t go to one of our events and NOT see any. It’s our drink of choice.

Have you ever been to a Nigerian party? What did you think? To my Naija people. Do you agree?

P.S. Speaking of parties, I’m going to the Official Midwest Nigerian Independence Party tomorrow. It’s being thrown by my fave Naija DJ, DeeMoney so it’s gon be hotness. We won’t be wearing native since it’s at a club and we wont be spraying money (wait… we may. We’ve been known to start throwing money in a club). Let’s hope no pictures of my acting a plum fool end up on Facebook. I got a reputation to uphold. O___O

It’s Nigeria’s Birthday. ACT UP!

Luvvie — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 05:00:00 +0000

YESSSSS!!! Nigeria turns 49 today. It’s Africa’s most populated country. And before the intrawebs, we were known more for our oil-rich land than email scams. Negativity aside, I’m proud to be from the heart of Africa. So in honor of the day, I shall start off by singing our national anthem.

*clears throat* Mi mi mi mi miiiiiiiiii
*taps mic*

Ok I’m ready.
Arise, O Compatriots, Nigeria’s call obey To serve our Fatherland With love and strength and faith. The labor of our heroes past Shall never be in vain, To serve with heart and might One nation bound in freedom, peace and unityyyyyyyyyy.

SECKCHUAL CHOKLIT!!!

*crickets*
*drops mic*

Now that I’ve gotten that out the way, I am here to give my fellow Nigerians tips on how to celebrate this joyous day.

*Yell “NAIJA PRIDE” at random intervals throughout the day. In fact, answer your phone with “Naija Pride” instead of “Hello“

*Call someone a “FOOLISH IJOT” or “CLASSLESS WONDAH” if they piss you off

*Tell someone to “SHARRAP” (shut up) if they say something you disagree with

*Eat some rice that’s so spicy, it clears up your sinuses and makes your nose run (trust. My Mama’s Jollof Rice makes me cry. But it’s so delicious)

*Insult someone in your language but use a nice tone so they don’t know

*Listen d-_-b to your favorite Nigerian song and drop down and get yo’ eagle on no matter where you’re at. (*cranks that PSquare, Styl Plus, D’Banj, Shina Peters, Sunny Ade*)

*Take some fufu & stew to work for lunch and when people ask you what it is, roll your eyes and look insulted. Then say “IT IS FOOD! That is all you need to know.”

*Call ur granny in Naija and tell her hello. Oh, and talk EXTRA loud on the phone even though you can hear her clearly Oh, and pop some Bailey’s Irish Cream. You know we can’t have a celebration without Bailey’s.

*reads list* Ok, so I do 90% of this list on any random day. o__O

Rocking my flag

What are others doing to celebrate the day?

Oh, and of COURSE you must do the Bro Franklin!

My Readers are AWESOME!

Luvvie — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 05:00:00 +0000

*Sigh* Have I ever told you I heart you? Yes YOU! The ones reading this blog. I does! I heart you like:

Polident loves crackheads
Hoodrats love Pink Oil Moisturizer
Kanye loves tantrums
Ne-yo loves lipgloss

Why am I professing such profound love for yall? Because yours truly is a finalist in the Black Weblog Awards for: Best Humor Blog & Best Personal Blog.

*does jig*
*cartwheels*
*takes swig of Bailey’s*

It’s ALL because you, my FANTAWESOME (fantastic & awesome) readers voted for me. MUCH MUCH thanks to you. Y’all really like me? Like for real? I mean, I’m so touched. Like really. It makes staying up a couple of extra hours a night to write worth it. THANK YOU SO MUCH! A family that votes together, stays together!

I just feel so damn LOVED right about now! *HUGS READERS*

I said I wasn’t gon cry but I justbophohns ikgjojkhtph *UGLY OPRAH CRY w/ SNOT*

I find out if I’ve won on August 25th. If I do, y’all will get a chance to see me do a *wall slide* on video. Just for your enjoyment. I’m a (wo)man of my words!

Y’all stick around (and tell your friends about me.) Oh and don’t forget that you can subscribe to this page if you haven’t already. My updates can be waiting for you either in your inbox, or in your RSS Reader.

August is gonna be a good month here on AweLuv. I feel it in my spirits and my soul.

P.S. some of my favorite blogs were also nominated for the Black Weblog Awards: My Two Cents, Very Smart Brothas, The FreshXpress, The Black Snob, Afrobella. Check them out for sure.

Edit: Turns out that y’all are supposed to vote again for me in the Finalist Round. This will determine whether I win or not. Voting ends September 1st. PLEASE AND THANKS!!!

Party time! 150th Post eShindig

Luvvie — Mon, 13 Apr 2009 05:00:00 +0000

Welcome to the 150th post on Awesomely Luvvie!!!

My butler Benson has the day off but take off your coat and stay awhile. I’d prefer you take off your shoes since I just bought new carpet. Hope your socks don’t have holes in them or anything. Help yourself to the rice buffet (white rice, fried rice, jollof rice, basmati rice…). The dranks will be coming soon. In the meantime though, we got some Bailey’s. Some folks are supposed to bring the Grey Goose (with only minimal looseness) and the Patron (with the goneness).

People start chanting. “Speech, Speech, Speech”!

Me: *looking faux-shocked* Who me? Aww I didn’t expect this. Are y’all sure?

People: I mean, we guess.

Me: This is just so surprising. *pulls out 4-page letter*

*clears throat*

You like me! You really, really like me! Wow, I can’t believe its been 150 posts already. Who’da thunk folks would actually enjoy what I write so much. What started as my random penchance for rants and all things side-eye – inducing has turned into an eFamily of sorts. It’s gotten me an ePosse, many great friends, and opportunities to write for various sites.

I’d like to thank my Mom, for carrying me for those 10.5 months (I was two weeks late, on some serious CP time ish. This should probably explain my inability to be on time for anything. I was even late going down the birth canal. *shakes head*). Anyway, I’d also like to thank God, for creating me in His image (although He may not want to take credit for my lack of sense. See what had happened was, the day He was handing out some sense, I was late since I went back for seconds in the Rice line. By the time I got there, He was fresh out. Darn!)

Finally, I’d like to thank you, my reader(s), for making me feel listened to. Did you ever know that you’re my hero(es)? (No Bette). For real, y’all make blogging so much fun because then I know I’m not writing to an echoing room. If a Luvvie writes, and there’s no one to side-eye her, is she still Awesome? Methinks not. So THANK YOU for reading my stream of consciousness and for your comments (which make my day and make me show all my shark teeth). With that being said, let’s pop some eBailey’s! Here’s to my AWESOME readers!!! Cheers!

*takes a swig of Bailey’s*

Let’s keep the party going. *Cues Kool & the Gang’s “Celebrate good Times”*

LiteBread: “I’m outta control, Luvvie’s outta control. This whole dang party’s outta conttrooollllllll”

For my eShindig celebration, I’d like my readers to comment and give a toast. A toast to what? Anything. Just give me a reason to take another ~~swig~~ sip (What? It’s Monday! Don’t judge me!). Yes, that means YOU TOO lurkers and Google Readers. Say hey!

P.S. This is a No Stanky Leg party, heel toe, or chicken noodle soup zone. We keeps it classy around these parts. If I see someone doing the Stanky Leg, I may have to put them on timeout. I mean it!

Edit: It has been brought to my attention that I forgot to order some wings. Well I placed an emergency order to Popeye’s so they’re coming. I couldn’t afford no biscuits so… yeah.

*Party continues*

Aw snappp! Y’all don kicked off the electric slide!

Inauguration Ball was a HOOT

Luvvie — Wed, 21 Jan 2009 06:30:00 +0000

I was watching the Neighborhood Inauguration ball, and it was a GOOD TIME, even through the TV. The star power was ridiculous! But y’all know I got some things to say.

The GREAT

*My President has rhythm. Y’all saw him and Shelly (yes, we have given her a nickname) getting down

*Who else was cheesing like a FOOL when Barack started doing the bump with someone? I was expecting him to even start stepping with Michelle (y’all know how us Chicagoans do)

*Michelle Obama is officially a style icon. She can’t do wrong in my book.

*I loves me some Mary J. Blige! Homegirl was fierce with that pixie cut and her dress (simple yet very flattering)

*I’ve come to like Joe Biden. In fact, I shall call him Grandpa Joe from now on.

*Dr. Jill Biden looked STUNNING in that red gown.

*The Obamas and the Bidens are sooo in love. It is awe-spiring to see them interact. Both the first dances had my thug almost on the floor. Just beautiful.

*All the performances were sooo enjoyable!

Honorable mention but not the ball: Y’all KNOW you loved Aunty Re-Re’s (Aretha Franklin) church hat at the actual inauguration. Sister O’Dell is somewhere JEALOUS!! That bow was larger than life (and Re-Re’s mammaries). She came church PROPER!!! l

The Bad & The Ugly

*How in the hot heck did Nick Cannon end up DJing it? I was personally offended because I could not figure out why he is even relevant enough to be invited, let alone play a part in it.

**Sigh* Y’all know I love me some Stevie, but I’ll be damned if his hairline doesn’t recess 5 inches every year. It’s like follicular panacea. He got half a mullet left with that shag. It’s like his hair is running away from his fo’head. Po’ thang.

*Why did Sting come in there looking like Paul Bunyan bout the face? He needed a shave BAD. He used to be FINE too but he looked like Peter Griffin in the episode of “Family Guy” where he grew a thick beard that housed a bird’s nest.

*Umm… Ray Romano deserves many boos. He was blander than a rice cake. His jokes were soooo flat! They coulda had Cedric the Entertainer in that piece!

*Why was Mariah Carey such a mess all around? First, I could see her underwear through the dress. Just uncouth. PLUS she sounded horrible. Mimi needs to go find the lining to her dress AND her voice.

*JayZ’s tux was CLEAN and sharp. I was LOVING it. I’m like “YESS he cleaned up well!”. Then I saw his hair and I faltered. His hair was rough! Looked like it was anti-brush. Bey, getcho man a lining.

*Shakira is the spanish Beyonce (weavaliciousness included). Plus, her voice always sounds like she is on the verge of crying. She irks me.

I quit watching the ball after I saw Shakira about to sing so I can’t comment on the rest. Either way, these bads were just fun to talk about. The Ball was mad fun to watch and the pride I had during the whole day was unmatched. I’ve been a grinning fool ALL day!!!

Edit: I just saw Kanye’s haircut. The nappy shag mullet. I’m soooo outdone. My sense and sensibilities are offended. I rebuke Kanye and his hair in the name of common sense. I just… Can’t. I quit him.

Edit #2: Y’all know I typically don’t do this but my friend LibraSong left this comment about Beyonce and iDied, so I had to highlight it. This is an excerpt with an addition from what he also said on GChat. “I liked Beyonce’s dress and her performance for the most part (SHUTUP, I KNOW!!!!) but also in part because I could quite clearly see both of her entire areolas and nipples. I can draw that whole breast for you from memory REHT NAH!” Yeah, so I quit him!

No related posts.

It’s my BIRFDAY!!!

Luvvie — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 06:00:00 +0000

One score and four years ago, my mother brought forth on this planet, a new daughter, conceived in awesomeness and dedicated to the proposition that she shall be IG beyond means.

What this means is… IT’S MY BIRFDAY!!! *pops bottles of Baileys* *does jig* *gets sprayed with money* (you know how us Naijas do).

I spent this weekend in New York City celebrating with my BFFs. We did some girly stuff (spa day and shopping), and we are gluttons so we ate (a lot). Shoutouts to Cafe Veg in Harlem and Lola’s in SoHo. I had a fantastic time, and kicked it hard. And I got surprised with a dinner with 5 college friends. I felt hella special, and it has already been the best birthday EVER for me! So thanks, Iggy and Kindred!!

The Red Velvet Cake they got me. DELISH! But umm… should I be offended that they only put 3 candles on it? I mean, what are they tryna say?? hehe I keed!

CAPRICORNS RULE!!!

Oh and umm… *cough cough* I love gifts (although folks be trying to pull that whole combination Christmas-birthday gift. BOOOOOO!!!). Sooo um blog fam, what did you guys get me for the day of celebration?