Facebook and Old Folks are Here to Stay
As you see from my last post, old folks ain’t on the top of my Christmas list right now. This brought me to the fact that I can’t even avoid them if I tried. They’ve infiltrated my hangout spots now too! Like Facebook.
Remember when Facebook was just college students? Then they opened it to high schoolers and we threw all types of hissy fits. Markie Mark Zuckerberg ain’t gibbadamb though. Then he opened it to everyone and we almost blew gaskets eProtesting against it. No dice. We ain’t have NO say. What this means is that now, EVERYONE is on Facebook. From the neighborhood thug who JUST decided that keyboards weren’t to be shot up, to your great granny who just got her first email address “firstname.lastname@example.org.”
How many folks freaked out when their parents joined Facebook? *raises hands high* My mom just randomly told me one day. “I’m on Facebook!” Me: *exits room* *comes back* “How? Why? Who showed you???” Apparently, my aunt told her to join. She tried to add me as a friend but I left her in Friendship Purgatory for a month until I was ready. With a deep *sigh*, I clicked “accept.” Next thing I know, I’m seeing my mom’s comments under folks’ pictures and on walls. Me: The world don spoil! Then she told me to help her add pictures. That was 3 months ago. I still haven’t done it. What??? I keep forgetting! O__o.
One of my friends’ mama is always taking those “What kinda freak are you?” quizzes and I gag everytime it comes across my newsfeed. Miss Ma’am. I’ont wanna know you like that. I’ont wanna know what position my friend was conceived in. I just DO NOT!!!
Facebook be having you find out ALL types of stuff about your parents. When social networking goes WRONG! Finding out ALL types of information on your parents. iCan’t. It’s perpetual TMI and oversharing, especially when the info is about an adult in your life.
Shoutout to the former classmate of mine who THOUGHT her mom was 60, but learned via FB that she’s 40… iDied when Sister Toldja told me about this. When social networking goes WRONG! Finding out ALL types of information on your parents. iCan’t.
Even worse than parents joining Facebook is GRANDPARENTS being a part of it. When I say older folks, I’m referring to the geriatrics. The folks who may as well have stock in ben gay. But even then…
- The day I see a group or page on FB called “These young whippa snappers don’t know nothing bout that there,” I’mo log off.
- The day FB gets an app called “Diagnose the gout & glaucoma” I’mo put my account up for sale to the lowest bidder on craigslist.
- When all the old ppl change their FB statuses to their illnesses “artharatees” “the sugars” “all-a-tahmers,” I’mo deactivate my account.
- If FB gets a group called “We not old. We just creak a little,” I’mo press ctrl, alt, del & forcefully shut down my acct.
Moral of this story blog: I miss old, elitist, exclusive Facebook. I want it back. But I know it won’t be back.
Are your parents on Facebook? Did you friend them? Sharing is caring, AweLuvvers.