Random

Chilean Miner 21 Makes Sidepieces Think They Win

Y’all know I don’t post this late in the day but i had to put a little something on this one. The world is currently rooting for the Chilean miners who have been trapped for 69 days underground. Yesterday, the first man was pulled out and everyone cheered. This is awesome! Rescuing continues, and the feel good moments just roll by! Until that one person, who always ruins it.

The 21st Chilean miner (Yonni Barrios) was rescued, and drama awaited him before he even came out. Why? Because his raggedy ass requested that both his wife and his mistress come greet him as he made his way back to the top.

Chilean Miner 21 rescued

That ain’t yo wife, Yonni!

*blinks twice*

WHAT IN THE HELL?!? This is why side-pieces feel like they’re winning in 2010.

The wife declined to go, but the mistress took her happy ass down there. If I was the wife, I’da went just to mollywop his ass back underground. NO SIR! I would have came with my night scarf still on, no earrings and a raggedy tshirt. Then when he came out, I’d muff his ass in the face right back into the mine.

Then I’d turn to the mistress and say “YOU AINT BOUT THAT LIFE YOU STRANGER BISH!” Then CNN’s security would have to haul me away.

The Chileans must be a peaceful people because that wife had all the right to show up and act a complete fool. Her hubby is a belligerent dummy. Wife should have came and said to the mistress “I don’t SEE that bitch. I don’t KNOW her.” And then proceeded to cuss out her hubby PROPERLY on national TV.

You ain’t gon be trapped for 69 days and leave me celibate then request your SIDE HO to see you when you get out. HELL TO THE NAW BOBBY!!! And another thing YOU AINT GON DO is embarrass me on the global stage by saying I ain’t enough for you so you invite your mistress!!! NO. DAMB. SIR

I woulda acted 15 different types of FOOL at that scene. They’da known me as the “crazy miner’s wife” before the hour was up. AND the miner’s wife hasnt gotten none in over 69 days? Listen. Them is grounds for mollywopping on GP ALONE! NO MA’AM!

Then I learned that Yonni has had this mistress for 10 years. And apparently, the wife found out about the mistress because they were both at a vigil for the miners in September. How awkward. O__O

This is more drama than a telenovela on telemundo.

Then I saw a pic of the wife and the side-piece. Umm… is Yonni winning AT ALL or is he just doubly losing? I’ll let you all decide that. Alls I know is that Miner #21 has titanium balls!

As the world turns… Left is the sidepiece. Right is the wife. Shourrout to @SteenFox for twitping this.

Edit: Wait. Apparently at least 5 sets of wives and mistresses have confronted each other around these trapped miners. WOWSIES! What’s done in the dark… comes out with the miners.

Previous post

The Breakfast Song is Awesomely Foolish

Next post

Madame Cameroon's Lethal Side-Eye

27 Comments

  1. October 13, 2010 at 6:50 pm

    My favourite line of the year:

    “This is more drama than a telenovela on telemundo.”

    thank you

    • October 14, 2010 at 8:29 pm

      *curtsies* You’re welcome! lol

  2. October 13, 2010 at 6:52 pm

    This is just some bullshit! WTF kind of mess is this? Sister Wives now the Chilean love triangle. Darn shame.

    • October 14, 2010 at 8:30 pm

      Right. Things ain’t right in the world.

  3. October 13, 2010 at 7:38 pm

    ““YOU AINT BOUT THAT LIFE YOU STRANGER BISH!””

    *DEAD and gone*

    • October 14, 2010 at 8:29 pm

      I’m just saying…

    • October 15, 2010 at 12:21 pm

      LaLuvvie: I can’t read your stuff at work anymore *wheezing and rolling my size 18 thunder off the floor*

      That “You aint bout that life you stranger bish” has caused me to lose all my cool points at work…and I’m “LaRosa (Parks)” at work (da only one, son). You just rent the fabric from the temple in front of these people LaLuvvie. Shame on you. See you at 501pm.

  4. TC
    October 13, 2010 at 8:06 pm

    If I was the wife, I’da went just to mollywop his ass back underground. NO SIR! I would have came with my night scarf still on, no earrings and a raggedy tshirt. Then when he came out, I’d muff his ass in the face right back into the mine.

    ***HOLLERING***

    you just made my evening with this

    mollywopped that assures

    CLASSIC

    • October 14, 2010 at 8:29 pm

      For realsies. i’da acted a donkey ass fool!

  5. […] other around these trapped miners. WOWSIES! What’s done in the dark… comes out with the miners.[ORIGINALLY POSTED HERE] Article by LuvvieLuvvie roasts and rants at AwesomelyLuvvie.com. She is also the co-founder of The […]

  6. SweetTee
    October 14, 2010 at 9:42 am

    This really needs to be a VH1 Reality Show…I’m going to think of some title right now, pitch it and hope the money I make from it will pay for my next cellphone bill….

    • October 14, 2010 at 8:27 pm

      I’d SOOOO watch that if it was on VH1. I’m shameless like that.

  7. EmberRose
    October 14, 2010 at 9:46 am

    That’s just shameless. I do want to just throw out that Sister Wives is a choice for everyone involved. 😀

    • October 14, 2010 at 8:27 pm

      LOL @ Sister Wives. I still haven’t watched that show.

  8. Dat Chic
    October 14, 2010 at 12:17 pm

    ” would have came with my night scarf still on, no earrings and a raggedy tshirt.”.

    Somebody pass me a blak Toe Tag. Done lmao!!!!!

    • October 14, 2010 at 8:26 pm

      I’m just saying. I’da come thoo that piece ready to send something UP!

  9. October 14, 2010 at 12:32 pm

    Thank you so much for consistently providing cackles! I am crying laughing right now…and obviously not because of the content. It’s your delivery. Hilar!!! So glad to have your online presence in my life. Ha!!!

    • October 14, 2010 at 8:25 pm

      It’s my pleasure! That is what I’s here for.

  10. BlackBerry Molasses
    October 14, 2010 at 2:43 pm

    iHateChu Luvvie!!!

    But for real? Foolishness. This is going to have side pieces actin’ all outta pocket now. Da fugg? I wish a negro and his heaux would….

    They would find out exactly how a stiletto can be a murder weapon.

    • October 14, 2010 at 8:23 pm

      Side pieces have BEEN acting outta pocket in 2010. They’re rampant and being bold. I blame A. Keys.

      • October 14, 2010 at 8:52 pm

        Nah Luvvie they been outa of pocket way before A.Keys!!!

  11. October 14, 2010 at 8:50 pm

    I am quiting you again!! You ain’t shit Luvvie!!!

    And I am sick of men and their damn mistresses when do they have the damn time?… And what the hell did they do for 69 days? o___O will there be boyfriends too??? Got damb!!

  12. paintgurl40
    October 15, 2010 at 11:00 am

    maybe the wife got her a side piece too….that motherfucker been trapped in that hole for 69 days and she didn’t want to be there? even after she found out about da hoe?? naw…she probably mad as hell he home now! got to cook and clean up after his ass…

    • October 20, 2010 at 12:52 am

      Oooooo!!! If the wife had a sidepiece too, I’ll DEMAND that they all go on Jerry springer. This is TOO juicy to leave on CNN!

  13. Lexxaye
    October 19, 2010 at 12:15 pm

    -prays to sweet baby Hayzoos- @ ” would have came with my night scarf still on, no earrings and a raggedy tshirt.” & “YOU AIN’T BOUT THAT LIFE, STRANGER BISH!”

    AHH, never again will I read your blog in a public forum. That’s the easiest way to embarrass myself!

    This was the good laugh I needed, tho. Lawd!

    • October 20, 2010 at 12:38 am

      When will you learn this lesson? Either read my blog in the solace of ur home or learn to cackle silently. These will save you from acting out in public. Or getting fired.

  14. bogart4017
    November 2, 2010 at 9:49 am

    It couldnt have went down like that in America. Can you imagine wives and sidepieces shoulder to shoulder in Brooklyn waiting on homey to come out the dark?