Pole Dancing for Jesus. I Have Seen It All
A couple of weeks ago, when I talked bout how someone needs to come get Juanita Bynum and her keyboard Holy Ghost stomping, one of my commenters (named Jazz) asked if I had heard of the gospel pole dancer. I had not, so I asked her to drop a link or it didn’t happen. She ain’t disappoint. She introduced me to:
*planks on an altar* I have seen it all. I have. I can take to my bed now and rest. This man is working his pole to gospel music! As he glorifies HIS name by sliding down a phallic metal structure. Y’ALL BETTER GIVE GLORY TO YOUR CHRIST THROUGH… *pause* POLE DANCE! -__- Apparently, praise dancing in flowing white clothes while a fan blows at the annual bazaar just doesn’t cut it anymore.
Oh and let’s not mention that homeboy’s Youtube name is MrPhatLips. (o__o)
Jesus, WE ALL need your glory because this life is just… WHAT IS THIS LIFE ABOUT?!? I understand that worship comes in all forms but using that pole like your name is Thunder Thighs Timmy ain’t my FIRST idea of how it’s ‘posed to go. Jesus’ holy side-eye might be activated once again.
Lemme not front though, and give props where they’re due. Homeboy worked that pole like he was getting cash for being brash. His upper body strength is really enviable. He OWNED that pole, like Qwa directors own their perms. He worked that like his VIP ticket into Heaven depended on it.
He slid down that pole with so much control, that I wanted him to go audition for the U.S. gymnastics team.
And I may or may not have tried to study what he did. Not like I wanna repeat it in the privacy of my husband’s boudoir one day or nothing. I was just watching it closely. For a friend. O_O
But umm… whatcha’ll think of MrPhatLips (O_o) and his Pole Dance for Jesus?
P.S. My homie Michael of The Cynical Ones posted an entry on the gospel remix of “No Hands.” Please go take a peek. It is ALL of the mess it sounds like.
Random sidenote: Check out my first piece with Clutch Magazine called “The Quarterlife Crisis is Real.” Heyyyyyyy!!!
I chose the winner by telling someone close to me to pick a number beween 1 and 50. They picked 23. That is the winner of my blog giveaway. The 23rd person who commented is: Tiffany of Life Requires More Chocolate! Tiffany, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org so I can send your GAP jeans certificate! 😀