Last year, Miss Zindzi and I collaborated to bring you the 25 Dumbest Tweets of 2010, summarizing a year’s worth of stupidity on Twitter into 25 highlights (or lowlights, depending on how you look at it). It was so well-received that it spurred me to create DumbestTweets.com to chronicle the foolishness that takes place in 140 characters as they happen. 11 months after creating it, over 1,000 tweets have been posted there. And there are still 350 in queue that haven’t been published. As long as Twitter exists, it will never run out of material. Thanks to everyone who has submitted tweets HERE this year.
So, having 1,000 tweets to pick from this time made it hard to just do 25 dumbest. This year, I gotta do 50. And deciding which 50 I went with was soooo tough. So, here’s the first 25, in no particular order of foolishness:
50 Dumbest Tweets of 2011: First 25
Alphet. ALPHET. This tweet has changed how I say “outfit” in real life. And I’m not pleased. But I am hella amused.
2. RT @PatPreezy: A tear is 1% water, 99% feelings
This tweet is 100% foolish. Sir, go have a seat. He must be tryna write songs for Drake. WOMP.
3. RT @cmaysphoto: Man A’s colored Benz. I pull miracle whips.
Wait. WAYMENT. “Man A’s” is supposed to be Mayonnaise??? iQuit. I can’t e’em…
How many errors can be in ONE tweet??? Oxford didn’t create his dictionary by candlelight for folks to come through and disrespect the English language like this!
5. RT @JoJo831: My hand hurts I think I have carpet tunnel
RT @EastSideKris: I got carpool tunnel
This CARPAL tunnel struggle is real out here.
6. RT @stephieM_xoxo_: I wanna do something that 90% mental Nd 40% physical
SEE?? She’s a go-getter. 130% is how she lives her life! Get like her! (-__-)
7. RT @_FlockaZulu: She rite. I luh me some Fillay minyon
RT @ExclusiveAccess: I normally only eat Filet Menion but this lemon grass steak at #StraitsATL. SMH #awesome
RT @Dash_tv: you think that hoe fila ming yong but she’s churches chicken… #ha
Filet mignon doesn’t deserve this. People need to just stick to eating what they can spell. I’ont wanna eat anything “flaming” unless they’re cheetos.
8. RT @gtrain88 June 31, 2010. I’ll forever remember that date.
February 31, 2011. It was also memorable for me. O_O
No. *EYE* need to be taken higher for this. If you can’t spell “silhouette” you better say “shadow!” Lawd…
10. RT @NaeYouCrazyy My dads son is sexy tho
You mean your brother? Oh. Ok. (-___-)
11. RT @BrentniBillionz: Why are the MySpace hoes & bitches on tumblr? Yall not supposed to upgrade your down grades and hammy downs.
“Hammy downs.” Not “hand me downs” but “hammy.” I’m tired.
He musta painted it right before the Titanic went down. o_O
13. RT @belliott404 Receipting hairline with cornrows #thataintwinning
A receipting hairline must be edges with proof of purchase. Oh. That ain’t it? Aight then. (-___-)
*counts on fingers* *carries the one* *multiplies by 2* Wait… WHAT??? Ma’am…
16. RT @markellmommy: Who tryna lick my click?
No one wants to lick your remote, ma’am! Oh you mean… Girl STOP! (-___-)
17. RT @SheAHotMama: OMG, this is the best seizure salad ever…
I don’t even wanna know what is in a “seizure salad.” I prefer CAESAR salads. O__O
Pay amish? Do they accept PayPal or…?
19. RT @Mr845Himself: What of I told y’all I had a low self coincidence.
What “of” we told him we believed it? “Low self coincidence” is something I don’t want. I’m confident of that. O_O
As she tweets from an iPhone. OK GIRL. O_O
21. RT: @kayjizzle: How far is GA from Atlanta?
RT: @Envy_kristen: I never new Las Vegas was in Nevada
RT: @meelie94: Does Africa have a capital?
RT @jacaristar: I can’t wait to visit the great state of chicago.
*starts a petition for Geography classes to be reinstated in schools everywhere*
“Mini pulse” though. I don’t e’em… I DON’T HAVE TIME.
23. RT @therealpinkyXXX: #agoodboyfriend is an endangered spices
Like the rarest of nutmegs. (-___-)
But Illinois is more of a loner. I heard Cali gets the party started though.
If you don’t succeed, try again. And FAIL the second time too. Who knew “hypocrites” was so hard to spell?
I really shake my head at this stupidity that happens on Twitter. Failed logic and spelling is rampant. The schools are failing us all.
So yes, this is just part 1. Here’s part 2 of the 50 Dumbest Tweets of 2011. Getchu a piece of those too!
Oh, and Tyrese isn’t on the list for a reason. If I had included him on this list, he’d make up at least 10 of the tweets. So I decided to do a 25 Dumbest Celebrity Tweets list too, to come later this week.
Which is your favorite out of these FAILS? Do you follow or know someone who ended up on this list?