It’s Nigerian Independence Day! You Know You’re Nigerian If…
It’s Nigerian Independence Day, folks! WHOOT! And we are a proud people with many quirks.
You know you’re NIGERIAN if…
* The only reason you dance at Nigerian parties is to get “sprayed” money by the adults. We are the ORIGINAL “make it rain” folks.
* Your parents add “O” to the end of every sentence. “SHUTUP O!” “YES O!” “ABEG O!”
* You’ve been called an “IJOT” more times than you can count by your parents.
* You’ve gotten in trouble for giving an elder something with your left hand. Apparently, that’s disrespect.
* You gotta call all the older Nigerians you know uncle or auntie even if they are not related.
* Your parents don’t have an inside voice when they’re talking on the phone. They just straight YELL.
* You know how to operate a phone card because your parents buy them on a weekly basis.
* You’ve had a seamstress all your life and people think you’re fancy because of it.
* When Shina Peters’ Afro Juju comes on at a party, you lose your mind and drop it low!
* You know what chin chin, puff puff, or moin moin are.
* You can pick which you like better, Eba or Amala. EBA ALL THE WAY! Amala tastes like despair!
* You been scared watching the movies your parents bring from back home. Who needs horror movies when you’ve got Naija ones that are even scarier?
* There is ALWAYS white rice in your house and it’s by the sack.
* Sometimes when you eat your Mom’s food, your nose starts running from the spiciness. But you can’t help but keep eating it because it’s just that good.
* A party starts at 6 and you show up at 10, and most people are still not there yet. O_O We are ALWAYS tardy for the party.
* You’ve been threatened by your parents into behavior when they say they’ll send you “back home.”
* You call Ramen noodles “indomie.”
* You point at something with your lips. And go MSCHEW.
* You’re mad that your clothes now smell of stock fish and stew.
* You gotta pronounce your last name 20 times for people and they still don’t get it rite!
HAPPY NAIJA INDEPENDENCE DAY, MY PEOPLES!!! NAIJA STAND UP!
Any of my readers fellow Naijas? WHERE YOU AT DOE??? Am I accurate?