The iPad That Was Actually a Mirror: Story of Fail
There are times when I wonder how some people don’t fall more just from their sheer stupidity. This is one of those times.
CNET said a woman named Jalonta Freeman was at a gas station in Arlington, Texas, when a dude drove up to her and said he was selling an iPad for $200. A brand new $800 iPad for $200. Yeah. Aight. O_O And when she hesitates, he says he’s in a hurry and he has to go quick. She says aight and gives him money and he speeds away. She opens the box to find:
A piece of cardboard with a mirror on it. And an iPad sticker.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *pauses* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
WHAT IS AIR, AS I GASP FOR IT???
When I tell you I laughed myself STOOPID? Chile… iSWEATERGAWD I laughed so hard I snorted. This woman just paid $200 for a cardboard box with a mirror on it so she can have something to stare at her own stupidity with.
I have many questions for Jalonta.
1. When someone drives up to you at a gas station tryna sell you something, do you not think they might be a crackhead? I might. Or at least shady as hell.
B. If this salesperson tells you he has to hurry so he doesn’t have time for your brain to stop and think and perform logic and reasoning operations, will you not give slight side-eye?
III. When you decided that this sale was something you wanted to consider, why didn’t you ask to see the iPad on the inside?
4a. When he gave you the box, was it 1 pound? I know iPads are light but I doubt the heft of that mirror could really mirror (HA!) the size of an iPad.
5. GIRL, WHAT IS YOUR LIFE ABOUT?
LMAOOO!!! Man, poor Jalonta. She got hoodwinked and bamboozled. But lowkey, I wanna congratulate the man who is currently walking around $200 richer and all he had to do was glue the mirror he broke on some cardboard. Sir, congrats for being clumsy and making money off it. That dishonest thief was making $200 outta cardboard. Literally.
When interviewed, Jalonta said “I would never do anybody like that. Get a job.” Ma’am, you would never do anyone like that because you’re not that clever. Also, he has a job. His job is to swindle people who don’t use common sense out of their hard-earned money. It’s not an honest job, but it’s a job nonetheless.
I kinda feel bad for this lady but I’m too busy hiccuping from laughing so hard at that picture of her looking basic as hell to feel guilty. Bless her heart.
The moral of this story is:
if something feels too good to be true, it prolly is. Don’t buy iPads from random dudes at gas stations. AppleCare doesn’t cover that! She needs to keep this iPad cardboard mirror as a constant reminder. Her own tangible “Never Forget” memorabilia.
So am I evil for laughing or are y’all guffawing with me?