It’s felt like forever since the first Love and Hip Hop Atlanta season ended but the cast is back and full of the same drama. It’s like we never left. Some people have soap operas, but for me, LHHATL is my “stories.” Joseline, Mimi, Stevie J, Scrappy, Erica, Momma Dee, K.Michelle, Rasheeda, Benzino and Karlie Redd are back and I’d missed them.
Nightscarfs and Denial – We see Mimi in the bathroom getting ready for bed. She walks into the bedroom, where Stevie J is sitting there with their daughter. SCREECH! Wayment! In her confessional, she tells us that it’s not what she looks like. She’s just there because of their daughter. Ma’am. Steebie’s in that bed looking mighty comfy and Mimi tells him that she’s moving into his house to prevent Joseline from spending time with her daughter. Girl… STAWP!
Budget for Scrappy – Erica and Scrappy are still happily engaged and living in a sparsely decorated house. In their room, Scrap is pulling out designer clothes and talmbout how he can’t rock anything twice. Erica wants them to set a budget on monthly clothes shopping and they settle on $1,200-1,500. I need to know where he’s e’em getting that money because where is he performing and who is paying for it??
Joseline and Stevie’s Verbal Jostle – Joseline is in some dank basement doing dance practice when Stevie comes in. He’s not happy that she disrespected his daughter (WUT?!?) and has words for her. She calls him a monkey bitch and other things and he calls her random things. I wasn’t listening. Also, neither one of them gets an award for the acting in that scene.
Poor Unfortunate Shay – Shay is still in love and butthurt about Scrappy proposing to Erica and leaving her hanging to dry. She goes to Mama Dee’s house to basically whine about it, and yall know that Pimptress loves her so she tried her best to comfort her. Of course, very little of what she said made sense but who gon check Mama Dee? Surely no one. She does tell Shay not to worry because a change gon come. Girl, ok.
Fergie, Jesus and a Keyshia – K.Michelle is in the studio working on her new album, all excited about a new record deal. She’s talmbout why she deserves success, saying she’s a mix between “Fergie and Jesus.” In that moment, for that line, I liked her. Anyone who quotes a Will Ferrell movie (Stepbrothers) gets points with me. But she’s such a bird. She’s like Keyshia Cole if she got watered down and had a bigger booty.
Appraisals and Mingnon – Erica’s mama, Mingnon, is skeptical about her ring being worth anything. I’m still not cool with her name being Mingnon, but that’s neither here nor there. Also, she should lay off the relaxer kit and wait at least 4 weeks between because that thin hair spoke VOLUMES. Ennehweighs, the two of them go to a jeweler to get her ring appraised. Shocking everyone, the jeweler says the ring is worth $21,000. Well DAMB!!! Did Scrappy use this platinum Rush card for it? I’m impressed!
Dollars, Benzino and Brutal Truth – Someone made Benzino, the human Spongebob Squarepants, a radio host *looks at V103* and he invites Joseline on his show. She says she gets money with Stevie on the business side ($20K a week) but says she’s “single and always looking for love. Because I like to have sess.”
She also says she’s 26. Which is a shame because she looks good for 42. (-_-)
Toast to Good News – K.Michelle and Erica are meeting up for drinks since they both have something to celebrate. One got a new record deal with Warner Bros. and the other is bethrothed to Scrappy. Yay them! K offers to throw Erica an engagement party, and when Ariane and Rasheeda are suggested as guests, she disagrees. She’s mad at Ariane for sleeping with her ex. How you gon say you wanna throw someone a pordee but shut down all the people they wanna invite because you got beed with everybody? Chile… ok.
Joseline and her Technicolor DreamFur – Stevie heard Joseline’s interview with Benzino, where she declared she was single. To patch things up with her, he presents her with some purple (and kaleidoscope under light. ok I’m just kidding) fur. Like a good pimp would do. And then he grabs her yansh for good measure. iCan’t with them.
Engagement VIP Booth – Mimi and Ariane ride together to Erica’s engagement party and Ariane is surprised she’s even invited. K.Michelle hasn’t talked to her since finding out that she slept with her ex, Memphitz, from a radio interview. The ladies get to the party (which isn’t really a party, as much as it’s 4 women in a VIP booth) and K ain’t tryna talk to Ari at first but soon, she starts going off about her breaking the G-code. Tension died though when one of them said”I FUCK WITH YOU!” “AND I FUCK WITH YOU TOO!” And then they dapped and kissed.
Hoodrats settle beefs so differently.
Decisions and Doubts – Mama Dee goes to see Scrappy, asking him if he still cares about Shay. And then she suggests he goes to meet her for lunch. Scrap tells her that he made his decision (Erica) and he wants his mama to go along with it. She’s such a creep and is so damb inappropriate.
Mimi, Maids and Madness – Mimi is in the kitchen talking to him when Joseline walks into the house in the furcoat he bought her, and some panny draws and a cropped top. She says “Hey Maid. I see you got on your maid outfit like you always do” to Mimi, who then flips out and tells her to get the hell out. Stevie walks Joseline to the car as she yells “she needs to come clean my condo.” WELPPPPPPPPP!!!
Joseline really did READ Mimi though, and left her behind cussing and going on like a fool. And Stevie of course didn’t take her seriously so she got mad and threw water in his face. Security had to escort him out.
I don’t have sympathy for Mimi’s plight because she puts herself in the path of disrespect by continuing to entertain Stevie in any way besides “father of my daughter.” WHY THE HELL did you move into his house? Then his sidepiece who became main girl walked in like “HEY BITCHES!” and you mad.
Mimi’s #selfofsteam gotta be in shambles. Joseline walked in looking like she just wrapped a shift at Magic City while she was cleaning up in his kitchen in a “free with credit card sign up” tshirt.” WOMP!
We see previews of what’s to come this season though and it’s gonna be a lot of tea.
Did y’all watch it? Whatcha think? I want Mimi to get her life.
P.S. Mona Scott-Young talmbout none of this is scripted. I wanna call Maury and tell him to get his trusty lie detector test. I mean, I don’t mind if it is, because I basically look at it like a show I’d watch on univision but ummm… yeah.