Whose Brother Was Rocking This Supreme Mullet?

The mullet is the hairstyle that will never quit. No matter how much we ridicule it. It’s come in different variations over the years too. With a front that has a bob or fingerwaves or braids. THE MULLET WON’T DIE AND I WONDER WHY!

HA! That rhymed.

But getchu a piece of this fella from days past:

Mullet man

Please get ALLLLLLL the way into this supreme mullet that homeboy is rocking. It’s business and military in the front with Rapunzel in the back. And you will deal because you are choiceless in the matter.

Can we talk about how that hair in the back is laid like victory? What he is rocking there is someone’s ideal 18 inch weave. Some people aspire to that level of follicular greatness but don’t quite make it. Meanwhile, Johnny (he looks like that’s his name) grew that bad boy with no problems. I bet he whips it #BAGGINFOAF on the regular.

whip my hair gif

This mullet is special for its ability to truly commit to being two very distinct hairstyles. The true disconnect between the front and back is admirable.

I know this photo was probably taken around 2002 though, based on the flip phone on Johnny’s pocket. We all thought it was ok for us to carry bricks outside our pants back then. We know better now. Well, some of us. We all have those uncles who still rock phones on their belts and we accept them anyway. We just laugh at them at Christmas.

But yeah. Mullets will never die. They’re like the starfish of hairstyles. You cut one off and it grows back elsewhere.

Bless his heart. Whose brother is this rocking this mullet? Are you jealous that your hair’s tale was never this luxurious? Tell a G.

P.S. I must spotlight the fact that this dude has a great yansh. It’s SITTING in them jeans. Swerve, sir!

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Rissa September 4, 2013, 12:42 pm

    Those waves! Yassssss! And those waves. You can’t tell him it’s 2013 and the president is black. He knows it’s 1982.

  • Stephanie September 4, 2013, 12:43 pm

    His yansh was the first thing I noticed! If you showed this picture from the shoulders down to a male acquaintance, they would probably fall over themselves trying to see more.

    • Starita34 September 4, 2013, 1:16 pm

      Thank you! That booty stole the show!
      Werk!

      • lexi September 4, 2013, 3:26 pm

        yaaaaaaaaaaaaas!!! lol I was like look at dat bootay dere!!!

    • Kwan September 4, 2013, 6:25 pm

      Okay! I was like ooh he gotta donk gone head sir!

    • Lenore September 5, 2013, 9:37 am

      I have to testify cuz ya’ll know that booty don’ lie.

      First thing I noticed too. I’m jealous.

    • Reese July 15, 2014, 10:11 am

      Hunney he has cakes for days in those Jordache jeans!

  • Mo Mo September 4, 2013, 12:46 pm

    This picture just made the coffee I was drinking come all up out my nose!!!

    Mr not only has two haircuts, he’s got 3 white guy’s worth of ass too

    Ps I’m sure that bag is one my mum used to have me carry home Yam in from the market. Why does he have an old Caribbean lady’s yam bag????

    • WhiskeyOnTheRox September 4, 2013, 4:31 pm

      Did you just say “3 white guy’s worth of ass?”…

      I. QUIT.

    • Dedra September 5, 2013, 1:54 pm

      I hollered.

    • me July 15, 2014, 10:03 am

      Old Caribbean lady’s yam bag = dead. I’m dead. BWAHHHHHAHAHAHHAHAH

    • Tracey July 15, 2014, 10:37 am

      Yam bag?!….gone.

    • Saundra July 15, 2014, 12:47 pm

      MoMo…you wrong. #dead

    • Leslie the geek October 29, 2014, 9:57 am

      *dead*

  • Shanique September 4, 2013, 12:58 pm

    I forgot about that mullet when I saw that yansh…Gosh darn how can a sista get herself one a those. Sighs…

    • MsZ July 15, 2014, 9:37 am

      He has to do squats or something! How can I get mine like that?!

  • Shica September 4, 2013, 1:39 pm

    He tucked his shirt in specifically for y’all to go home and eat your weight in emotions later about it. See this ass? Eat this ass! Lol!

    • lurker July 15, 2014, 12:17 pm

      I.CANNOT!!! ROFLOL

  • DaSweetestOne September 4, 2013, 2:43 pm

    Say….is that a Nokia 10lb phone?

  • JoLi September 4, 2013, 2:47 pm

    I am so glad you highlighted his back porch, cause I noticed that right away. That think looks like its corn and collard green fed, gotdamn! And that golden mane is flowing in all its Vidal Sasoon glory.. Yaaas!

  • Absurdist September 4, 2013, 3:08 pm

    No, no, the booty don’t lie.

  • Serenity September 4, 2013, 3:43 pm

    I’m more concerned with how big his ass is. White girls with asses is insulting enough, but now there men are getting asses too?

    • Marsha S. Haneiph September 4, 2013, 3:54 pm

      Serenity, white guys have been bootylicious for a long time. Didn’t you ever see the badonks on Russell Crowe and Christopher Meloni?

      • WhiskeyOnTheRox September 4, 2013, 4:32 pm

        Add Matthew McConaughey to that list.

      • Silk! September 4, 2013, 5:32 pm

        I love it when Chris Meloni turns around.

        Luvvie, far be it for humble me to edit your copy, but this post is quickly becoming all about White Boy Got Back. And Oh Yeah, He Has a Glorious Mullet.

        • DiosaNegra67 September 13, 2013, 2:10 pm

          *delurks again*

          Whatever you do….don’t look up Chris Meloni on tumblr. IJS *cough cough* holymeloni.tumblr.com 😉

          *relurks again*

        • Saundra July 15, 2014, 12:50 pm

          Damb…you shhudna told me that *drooling*

  • Jabari September 4, 2013, 4:09 pm

    Chile, his hair is LAIDT like Seabiscuit trotting through a sea of marigolds at sunset!
    His yansh is perched like he’s ready for a redneck twerk/leyomi drop session at the drop of a dime!
    In short, HE DID THAT! #Uheauxsarenotreadyforhisjelly

    But for real, how you get yo booty so thick, sir? I’m asking…for an interested party….

    • AwwNaw July 18, 2014, 5:31 am

      I was not ready for this comment!!!

  • Marcus September 4, 2013, 5:15 pm

    That hair is laid for the Norse GAWDS hunty! I’m sure Thor n ‘nem are VERY pleased, indeed!

    And on another note…dat ass….

    • Sara September 5, 2013, 12:11 am

      LMAO! not the Norse gods. Tears!

    • RavenJ September 5, 2013, 2:54 pm

      YES!!!!!!!! Thor Game Proper!!!

  • Kwan September 4, 2013, 6:28 pm

    Chile he don’t know whether he wants to drop down and give 20 or spring forth from the sea foam Botticelli style. His hair is truly laid like “War & Peace”.

    • Angela July 16, 2014, 1:43 am

      I see what you did there with war & peace. Nice!

  • Akua September 5, 2013, 8:39 am

    Luvvie, ma’am, iCant with you today. I made the mistake of reading the Vine post and then reading this. I was done by the time I got to the “hair laid like victory.” Just at my desk cackling like I didn’t have any damn sense. When I got to the end and ol’ boy’s hindquarters, I hooted. Hooted like an owl. Hooted so loud that my co-worker came to see if I was ok. I need my job, these student loans won’t let me great, but this post right here. Lawd! *forwards post to three co-workers*

    • Tamiko September 5, 2013, 10:39 pm

      I did the same thing Akua! Over here needing an O2 tank just to regain the life that Luvvie and the male Coco Austin took!

  • milaxx September 6, 2013, 12:07 am

    I dunno, my mama still rocking that phone. She refused to upgrade cause she says “ain’t nothing wrong with her phone.”

  • Brandy July 15, 2014, 9:50 am

    *in my Bey voice* He be drape’n, he be drape’n….

  • Tracey July 15, 2014, 10:39 am

    And his 18 inches if fried harder than some chicken wings!:-$

  • Nicole Cottles Adams July 15, 2014, 10:54 am

    If only laughing worked for the ass as well as the abs….between “laidt like the Norse gods”, “3 white boys’ worth of ass” and “the carry home yam bag” I am no more good for the day….and I’m not even out of bed yet.

  • Elizabeth W July 15, 2014, 11:47 am

    This. This right here is -exactly- why my girls did NOT DATE IN HIGH SCHOOL. If you’re white and grow up in Upstate NY (Real UPSTATE, Not Westchester), this fella and his kin make up a LARGE portion of youru dating pool. Little know fact: MulletMen have sperm so powerful as to get that homecoming queen preggers and sentenced to lifetime work at the Dairy Queen with one fell schwoop of the front of their Yansh. Yup. White Folk. Ima one of them.

    • Angela July 16, 2014, 1:48 am

      Not the Dairy Queen! Lmbo

  • CK July 15, 2014, 5:05 pm

    he looks like someone glued a hairpiece to the back of his head while he was sleeping. also we’re just gonna bypass the dad jeans though?

  • MarvyMds July 15, 2014, 8:50 pm

    I would love to know Mullet Man’s true identity and the secret to that apple bottom. I need to know if that’s just genetics or if he works at it. Also, is he still wearing Billy Ray Cyrus’ old hairdo. I need answers!

  • Dawn July 15, 2014, 10:04 pm

    I’m really surprised that none of y’all recognized this man. This is CLEARLY Dog the Bounty Hunter circa 1992. That is the ONLY white man that has been authorized to wear a mullet that long and jeans that tight! #HegataDONK

  • Msbdphillips July 15, 2014, 10:05 pm

    He is about that M&M life – mullet & mom jeans!

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