Fixing the Fix – Jake is telling Olivia that shutting down B613 was some treasonous ish (it was) and she’s all incredulous about it when Fitz walks in to basically go “WTF, LIV?” Again, why she thought she was gonna do it and not be in hot water is beyond me. Jake then lets the info drop that Liv slept with him to get the codes and Fitz is unable to deal, based on his face.
Right then, in walks Daddy Pope, who has been summoned. When in trouble, bring in your best goon.
Rowan needs to help them find Dominic, who will then lead them to Maya who will then lead to the bomb. Jake’s talmbout how his men are tracking them and Papa Pope replies with a shady “is that why they’re in the wind?” SONNED. Olivia tells Fitz that he cannot leave the White House until further notice. Not to campaign. Not to get fresh air. NADA! He better stay his yansh put so he can be safe. He begrudgingly agrees because Rowan supports her decision on it.
Elsewhere, Quinn is making #breffis for Charlie and tryna assure him that she ain’t ride-or-die for OPA when he gets a code over the radio. They gotta report somewhere. Turns out, it’s to OPA! Lawd.
Command vs. Command – CharleyQuinn gets to OPA and it’s in the middle of a major ego battle between Rowan and Jake. Finally, Papa Pope picks up his dereon duffle and says either he leaves or Jake does. Olivia picks him to stay with a quickness and Jake from State Farm storms out, talmbout he ain’t gon help when shit hits the fan. Liv follows him and he reminds her that her daddy is evil dinnamug. “He will break your bones and step over your body on the way out.” I gotta give props to Abby for her shade to CharleyQuinn when they walked in. “So are you two like an item now?” Their raggelly asses sure are. Ew.
Hightower Gone – President Ghost, Cyrus and Mellie are in the Oval Office and they find out that an older congressman, Senator Hightower, died of a heart attack. Fitz is all butthurt that he can’t leave to show his respects because people on the outside are tryna kill him. Drunk Mellie cackles and asks If it’s just people outside who want him dead. I love her.
Bomb Remote – Maya Pope is given a phone that she needs to punch in a code to activate the bomb. She can do it from anywhere too. Faints LAWDDDD! Meanwhile, why hasn’t anyone cussed Harrison’s dumbass out yet for sleeping with Adnan, getting knocked the hell out and then losing ALL the data from Liv’s computer? Someone shoulda snatched his edges by now. Is Abby busy?
Campaign Call – President Ghost calls Olivia because his lack of campaigning is losing him points and VP Sally is gaining them. He says he might even lose the NAACP vote and Liv replies with “I’m telling you I’m Black. Sally doesn’t have the NAACP.” HAAAAAA!!! He’s all antsy because Defiance is sitting on his chest and he wants to win his 2nd term fair and square. She assures him that they will campaign by bringing it all to the White House so he won’t need to leave. Then he starts telling Liv that he misses her. NAWL, BRO! Tuck that in! Ennehweighs, I hope the NAACP backed up their website last night cuz them servers might have been overloaded cuz of Scandal. Preparation.
Harrison and Pope – Back at the OPA office, Harrison is looking at Adnan’s pic when Rowan walks in. The gingham-less Gladiator says “Is it okay if I call you Papa Pope?”
Oooooooo!!! SEE? More fuel to the “He is Brolivia Pope” fire. MMHMM! CharleyQuinn comes back and says they couldn’t find the bombmaker (Dominic) and there’s a sound. They rush outside the conference room to find Huck there with Dominic tied up. Dang, he moves fast!
Harvard Scheming – Earlier, Leo went to some high school was talmto a student who demanded he get her into Harvard if she does what he’s asking. Wells, now we know what it was. We see the girl in Lil Jerry’s room, making out. She asks if he has a condom. THIS IS A SETUP! Later, she meets Leo under the bleachers with a bag of Lil Jerry’s Lil Jerrys. Ew. Now she wants Harvard AND Yale. Shoo… he better throw in Stanford too. Leo goes “you coulda just stolen his toothbrush” but apparently, that wasn’t as fun.
Questioning Dominic – Huck, Rowan and Olivia are tryna get a tied up Dominic to give them info on Maya and he is saying nothing. He does tell Liv that he hasn’t seen her since she was really young. OH WORD? Papa Pope tells Huck to have fun with him until he gives up some goods but Liv tells them both to come outside. She wants her main goon to be gentle on the dude and not hurt him. THIS AINT SELF-ESTEEM CAMP! LET GOONS DO WHAT GOONS DO!
Papa Pope gets a call and it’s Leo saying he has Lil Jerry’s “man chowder” and he needs to know if he has access to Ghost’s DNA because the first lady is asking about a paternity test. When he hangs up, he tells Olivia to go to the White House and fix THAT.
Mellie’s Pain – Olivia goes to the House and asks Mellie about the paternity test and the FLOTUS tries to deflect at first. She tells her that Leo and Sally both know because she asked the WH doctor and that’s both sloppy and stupid. BUT she knows that she is neither of those things so it must have been done purposefully. Liv asks her “which one is Andrew’s?” and she flips out! Mellie (and her hooch) claps back!
“I want his head in the fire and I want to see him BURN… I have kept this secret for 15 years. I have lost my life for 15 years. I have lived this lie for 15 years. And all the while, I have watched him walk away from me. I have been destroyed while I have made him president. IT IS MY TURN!… I’m tired of carrying the cross. Let him pick it up now.” And then she sputters “Big Jerry isn’t something I want to be nailed to anymore.”
She catches herself too late and she asks Olivia to clean this mess up. She STILL didn’t say Big Jerry raped her so Liv might think it was some fling they had. Still incomplete but she’s clearly at her wit’s end.
Losing Lemony – David Rosen shows up at his office and finds Jake in his chair. Command tells him that he’d warned him to stay out of grown folks business but he was all into the break down of B613. So now, his mission is to check out all the security cameras in DC and use the face recognition stuff to find Maya Pope. Lemony Snicket can’t win EVER.
Bomb Plant – Two men place the bomb in the floor of some unidentified place. The janitor of wherever they are is slumped down on the wall, dead from one bullet wound to the head. Aw shit. Folks gon die!
Dominic’s Downfall – CharleyQuinn and Huck get no info out of Dominic so Eli/Rowan takes Charlie’s gun and puts one bullet in it. He’s gonna handle this himself. Liv asks him “WHY? WHO IS HE?” and her dad says “Dominic Bell is the only man your mother EVER loved.” AW SHIT! He’s jellis!
He wants to use Maya’s lover to lure her in so he walks in the room where dude is tied up and says he has 1 bullet and 6 chambers. He needs to know where his wife is. Dominic calls her and Rowan takes the phone to say he got her boo all hemmed up and if she doesn’t come into the office, he’s gonna kill him dead. Maya basically laughs and ain’t got no worried. She is unbothered as hell even as Rowan pulls the trigger each time, getting closer to the chamber with the bullet. Huck needs them to keep her on the phone for 20 more seconds to trace where she is. With 2 more bullets to go, Maya says goodbye and hangs up. MONSTER TINZ!
Olivia is screaming for her dad to stop and he turns around and tells Huck to take her out the room. He drags her away kicking and screaming and when the door closes, she hears one gunshot. DOMINIC GONE. THAT DUDE IS DEAD! EVERYONE HAS KILLED SOMEONE! Well, not Abby. She ain’t killed nobody. Also, everyone is a scorned lover of someone else. #IyanlaFixTheirLoveLives. All these hurt Beloveds…
DNA Deception – As they clean up the body, Abby takes a hair sample from Dominic and gives it to Rowan who gives it to Leo who takes it to the paternity test dude. Abby shows up and the guy tells her “the DNA is not a match.” She says “Yes it is” and slides him an envelope of cash. IT IS NOW! He hands the results to Leo who gives it to Sally. The report says what it needs to, which is that Jerry is Fitz’s spawn. Sally is all disappointed.
Venting to Command – Olivia calls Jake and is all in shambles because she realized that BOTH her parents are monsters beyond even she imagined. “She loved him my whole life and when the time came for him to save him, she didn’t.” Oh you just realized mama is satan? And then her daddy killed him in cold blood. Why does Jake still answer Liv’s calls??? I’da been blocked her ass A LONG TIME AGO! Instead, he’s all reminiscing about their night in the sack and their “connection.” These simps, man! You shut down my org and we ain’t talmbout NO emotional connection we had.
Plus, she’s MAD SELFISH! How do you sell this man down the river and then call him to vent ALLATAHM? And then she tells she loves Fitz and how that good lay felt like betrayal. Girl, GOOD DAY! Liv shoulda been listening to a dial tone. Jake is a fool.
Behind Campaign – President Ghost is 4 points behind Sally and there’s 5 days to go before the election while Liv is playing Butthurt Bandit. Liv confronts her dad and he says “I’ve waited a VERY long time to kill that man.” LMAO!!! Papa Pope is so petty and I enjoy his ability to admit it. Apparently, Dominic has been Maya’s lover since FOREVER and he even told her to marry Eli/Rowan. CHILE! What if he’s really Liv’s dad? Why are the Popes such a mess??? Also, back to the Brolivia Pope theory. What if Dominic is Harrison’s dad and Maya had him while she was on one of her missions? Chile… I can’t even. Also: I might have been right all along.
Squabbling Assassins – Huck and Charlie are supposed to be disposing of Dominic’s body with Quinn but the two of them are arguing like two idiots so she leaves them in the garage and drives away to do the job herself. Ain’t nobody got tahm for their foolishment.
Defiance Won’t Die – President Ghost realizes that he’s losing points in Ohio and no Republican president has ever won without the state so he tells Cyrus that he doesn’t care what Liv says. He’s going. Cy calls Pope as they board Marine 1 and her father tells her to go to Ohio too. Because the one person her mother does love is her and she won’t detonate a bomb if she’s present.
Harrison tracked the address of some of Adnan’s financial transactions to some warehouse. He walks in and sees plans and pics on the table. One is of Defiance High School in Ohio. Must be where the bomb is! He looks up and Adnan is pointing a gun at his head.
At Defiance High School, the Grants are sitting on stage when Olivia slips in and sits next to them. Mellie (in a bad ass red suit and drunk as a sunk) is in the middle of Ghost and Liv and as the two talk across her, she says “If we’re gonna die, can we do it right now so I don’t have to listen to you two?” DRUNK MELLIE FTW!
When Fitz hits the podium, Liv tells Mellie she’s handled the paternity thing but if she still wants the real test, she just gotta say the word.
Bickering Bitches – Quinn drives back and finds Huck in the garage. She says she handled it because him and Charlie were being “2 bickering little bitches.” Best thing she’s EVER said. But then, their conversation quickly devolves to the two of them playing tongue hockey: playoffs edition. And then Huck slams her against a car and they have rough secks and I basically wanna chair slide unto the floor because this is all just gross and EW EW EW AND ARE YALL NOT GONNA USE CONDOMS OMG WHY IS THIS HAPPENING??? UGH! And as they do alladis, Mama Pope walks right past them and enters the OPA offices, surprising Eli. She says “Bring my baby home.”
Bomb Chasing – Papa Pope calls Liv tells her that the bomb is at Defiance High School so she doesn’t have much time. As President Ghost makes his speech and riles up the crowd, she whispers in his ear. He tells everyone that a sprinkler went off in the basement so they have to cut it short. Good for them for getting out!
Back in David’s office, he finally finds Maya’s face on the camera system. He tells Jake that what Marie/Maya has been up to isn’t what they thought. Uh oh.
In about 2 minutes, Olivia ends up back in OPA. Ohio to DC is 2 minutes? I know Marine 1 is fast but… DAMB! Olviia’s super power is to apparate. She got from Ohio to DC faster than Harry gets to Hogmead’s Head from Diagon Alley. Who knew? When she enters the office, the place is empty and she calls for her dad and looks over and something shocks her.
Meanwhile at the warehouse, Harrison is sitting across Adnan and the news is on talmbout the evacuation of Defiance H.S. He’s all giddy because he thinks her plan’s been foiled but she says it’s going just as it is supposed to. The bomb isn’t at the school. Aw hell.
Jake can’t get in touch with Olivia but HuckleberryQuinn’s ol’ HORNASSES roll into the office and find Olivia on the floor of her office. Her father has been shanked and he’s gasping for breath. Blood is all over him. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO PAPA POPE!!!!!
Deadly Silence – Cyrus gets a call from Jake who says Senator Hightower was really killed by Maya so she could have a gathering spot where the President would need to be present and the Mona Lisa of BOOM could be used. Cy says he’ll alert all the acronyms (FBI an’ em) and get the church cleared and that President Ghost won’t be anywhere near there. He calls Ethan, the aide and asks if VP Sally has already headed out to the funeral. She has. Cyrus is STFU because if someone gotta die, why not Langston? EVIL!
At the church, the dignitaries are gathering. Leo’s there with Sally. Governor Nichols shakes her hand. One floor below is the bomb, inside the floor. As Cyrus walks all cheerily through the White House, Maya Pope activates the code for the bomb. There’s 59 minutes left before it blows. Elsewhere, Mellie is opening the results of the real DNA test.
Cyrus walks into the Oval Office and tells the President that he wants to hear his eulogy for Senator Hightower. Way to stall. The episode ends with “Smiling Faces” playing as Cy sits looking pretty satisfied. Chile…
PAPA POPE BETTER NOT DIE!!! I LOVED HIM FIERCELY! iSWEATERGAWD if they kill Papa Pope. I mean, I ain’t gon do nothing. I’m just saying. >___> Saints and Aints, we need the Usher Board to gather together and all the prayer warriors. ROWAN/ELI POPE CANNOT DIE!!! Lawdddd! He just cannot!
I’m just mad about how EVERYONE has been fugging up ALL season 3 on #Scandal. Huck, Harrison, Olivia. I’m so unable to deal with their successful failing. This is NOT the Olivia Pope and Associates I fell in love with. These people are some sloppy amateurs. I need Shonda and her team to get their mojo back because this ain’t e’em what the Gladiators are ‘posed to be about.
Huck let some Love Pocket from Quinn distract him when he was supposed to be protecting the office. How in the hell did Mama Pope just stroll on by them all willy nilly? That ish was a mess. Also, did I remember to say ALL THE EWS THAT EVER EWED IN EWLAND?!?!? I was on my couch like:
Speaking of secks, season 3 better not end without Fitz and Olivia finding out that Big Jerry raped Mellie. That carrot does not need to be dangled into season 4. It is really unlike Scandal to hold on to such pertinent info for such a long time. Shit, in season 2, we had found out who the mole was by now. Sheesh! Come on with it!
But SHOUTOUT to Bellamy Young. She’s been giving masterful performances ALL season! Love her!
The Scandal season 3 finale is next Thursday and there’s all these messes on the floor that need to be cleaned up. Gladiators ROAR in the comments!