Solange Has Won at Weddining

Today, Solange Knowles got married to her longtime LAVAH Alan Ferguson in New Orleans and pictures dropped and everyone has lost their minds. Why? BECAUSE SO MUCH FIERCENESS!

Solange Wedding

Looking like the angels in the thug mansion that Tupac was talmbout. I’m so here for this picture. *I* wanna get Solange’s wedding photo with her girls and put it on my wall. Just because the pic is so damb magnificent. WERK, FIERCE ANGELS. And Tina. BIIIISSSHHH listen. Coming out the house looking like a tall drink of good almond milk. SLAY, Mama Knowles! Sixty years old and FINER than frog hair.

Meanwhile, Matthew Knowles was nowhere to be found. He gotta sort out a couple of cases of his sperm landing on the uterus of two people who ain’t named Tina. All his dirt was gonna sully all the white clothes and dry cleaning bills are TOO DAMB HIGH. So yeah, he’s busy.

I bet somewhere, Kanye West is PISSED that he spent 4 days editing HIS wedding photo for Instagram and it didn’t #breaktheinternet. Yes, they got hella likes but people didn’t fall all over themselves. That picture is not memorable. Oh Kanye. He tries so hard. I bet he didn’t even get invited to this. When he asked Jay what he’s up to today, Mr Carter was like “Nothing. Just going to brunch.” He was all “Jay, wanna go to this new restaurant on Sunday Nov 16?” and Jay-Z was like “Me and Bey got this event. Next weekend, doe?” Now Kanye’s like “Oh. So that’s why Jay hasn’t replied to my WhatsApp message all day. I know he got it. There’s a double checkmark here.” >__> You know he is somewhere mad as hell.

Solange Wedding 3

I. LIVE.

By the way, the one smiling person in the main pic is Janelle Monae but people DO NOT recognize her when she isn’t in a tux. Now I understand why folks couldn’t figure out Superman was Clark Kent. You put Janelle Monae in a dress and fluff her fro out and people be like “who’s that?” She probably be at Target EVERYDAY and we can’t tell.

All I know is that I can’t wait to see the first person who tries to replicate the Solange Girls pic for their wedding. It’s gon be a Pinterest fail. If your friend sees this pic and thinks it’s a good idea for her special day, tell her to sit down for a second because the dragging she might face on these interwebs might be too much. It ain’t worth it.

But yall know what these #SolangeWedding pics mean, right? The number of all-white parties happening next summer will be triple the usual. Lemme get my all-white linen #alphets together NOW! I’ll be over here awaiting the invites to yall’s shindigs for Summer 2015. Especially in Chicago. Our country asses love us a good Ghost Party so you know it’s going down (basement) come June. And yes, Chicagoans are country. Blame the Alabama and Mississippi transplants. I love my city, doe. ALL WHITE STEPPER’S SET GAME PROPER!!!

The price of white fabric is bout to go up just from these Solange pics. I’ve been looking for a double-breasted white wool coat too so this surge pricing ain’t gon do me well. EVERY SINGLE PICTURE from this wedding is killing me softly. Even what she wore before the ceremony SLAYED.

Solange Wedding 2

THIS JUMPSUIT IS EVERYTHING. EVER-REE-THANG.

I also know that people are about to use these pics in all types of ways they’re not supposed to. The promoter who uses the Solange wedding pics for their all-white “Grown and sexy” club party flyer is a raggelly and classless wonder. It’s gonna happen, too. Some bamma is already planning an all-white Friday turn up and his graphic designer (who uses MS Paint) is putting together the collateral AS WE SPEAK, where he will use 7 fonts and 15 colors to tell people to come before 11pm for free entry and the only drink specials are for E&J. NO MA’AM.

Whew. Either way, shoutout to Solange for breaking the internet, winning hearts and doing it all on her own terms on her wedding day.

Also: if you didn’t think Solange is a style icon before, you were wrong. She has won. Solange has won all of weddinging.

P.S. I don’t even mind too much that Beyonce showed up dressed like Mariah Carey in that spaghetti strap dress with lucite heels.


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Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Leslie the geek November 16, 2014, 9:03 pm

    *deep breath* YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA*gasp**inhalerpuff*AAAAAAAAASSSSSASSS

  • onlychyld November 16, 2014, 9:04 pm

    Everything about this is life giving. I’m especially here for Solange’s gold cuff bracelets. You know they’re just like Wonder Woman’s and that is the power that was used to keep Matthew Knowles away if he tried to crash.

    • GracieGrace November 17, 2014, 9:46 am

      I love you for this comment. Those gold cuff bracelets are EVERYTHING. And Wonder Woman power? Chile YAASSS!!

  • MissTish November 16, 2014, 9:05 pm

    Solange’s looks are clothes that Mya stole out of Olivia’s closet and sold on ebay. #fierce

  • QueenC November 16, 2014, 9:06 pm

    Im still 22….so if I do this at like 27…no one will remember and I’ll still slay right LOL?

    • Kayla November 19, 2014, 1:13 pm

      Giiiiirrrlll, I was already thinking what I could do similar! Lmaaao.

  • AB November 16, 2014, 9:12 pm

    These pictures dropped and the world went in a moment of silence mode. #KILLEDIT

  • Sheletha November 16, 2014, 9:13 pm

    The only one with a big smile is Janelle Monet!! Shes so cute!

  • Diana November 16, 2014, 9:14 pm

    YASSSSSS Butterfly Luvvie.. we were on the same page.. HAD TO WRITE ABOUT THIS… IN a hair type of way but nonetheless.. it happened for the both of us.. #SheLaidHERBurdensDown ON MY TIMELINE..Loved every minute of it…. and wait why you slay me softly every time.. EVERY POST.. If you have time, check out my post: Inviting you to SWB: http://www.sisterswithbeauty.com/2014/11/solange-knowles-wedding-say-i-do-to-my-fro/

  • Nyphoria November 16, 2014, 9:16 pm

    But is nobody gonna say that the chick sitting on the floor behind Beyonce looks a helluva like Lark Voohies(Lisa Turtle, Saved By The Bell) with the Bob sans wacky make up…#WhatUpWitDat

    • LBoogie915 November 17, 2014, 8:16 pm

      Really? BC I was like that’s Lorraine from ‘What’s Love Got to do with it’ and immediately started to ask “Why is he heeyuh Ike? Why is she heeyuh?!?!?!

  • SIPort November 16, 2014, 9:33 pm

    Shall not lie. from the moment the first picture dropped, been checking the internet for more. Those pics are all that and a bag of chips. FIERCE is right. I mean…the pantsuit was what I saw first…then I saw the pics of all the ladies..her standing there with the cape…oh no.

    And, a beautiful pic of the Family Carter – Blue Ivy looks like Jay just spit.her.out.

  • NRB November 16, 2014, 9:41 pm

    Yes! I love the pictures. I cackled at “ALL WHITE STEPPER’S SET GAME PROPER!!!”statement. Since it’s winter is will be the “winter white stepaganza.”

  • notconvincedgranny November 16, 2014, 9:44 pm

    #howtobefreshandclassic
    #howtokeepitquietandreleasewithayell

    Oh yea – get down with yo bad self, Ms. Tina. Somewhere Matthew is crying in a $1 beer that had to be put on somebody elses tab.

  • notconvincedgranny November 16, 2014, 9:49 pm

    Oh yeah – that jumpsuit is BACKLESS. Yes Lawd!

  • jcanwisegrrl November 16, 2014, 10:04 pm

    Solange. Now SHE #wokeuplikedis

    These pics are FIERCE to the 10th power times infinity. The caped jumpsuit! The FRO! THE FRO! OMG! I’ve been saying for years that if I ever get married, I want a big ass fro and everybody looked at me sideways. Whenever I say it again and I get sideyed, I’ma just reach for a pic of Sol-Angel’s fierceness and drop it on their asses like BOOM! You’re right Luvvie, Solange has won. She has won the interwebs, fashion, style, fierceness, cool and weddinging. I wish her and her family all the very best!

    • howling banshee November 16, 2014, 10:35 pm

      Yes yes yes. I am all the way here for the Bridal Fro and the Bearded Groom. And I ain’t even mad that her man is fiddysumthin. With his beautifully bearded self. Yes Sir.

      • jcanwisegrrl November 16, 2014, 10:40 pm

        I had no idea her boo was that old. He looks GOODT!

        Honestly, the fro was the first thing I noticed when I saw the pics. I was like C’MON FRO! Then I took in the dress and the jumpsuit and the cuffs and the bikes and the all-white-everything. The sight of a big, perfectly shaped cloud of hair has been known to make me verklempt. Lol! I was over here fanning my eyes.

      • Serenity November 17, 2014, 10:23 am

        You know that beard has a lot of Just for Men combed all up and through. Must be the good isht too since it didn’t drip on all that white

  • jcanwisegrrl November 16, 2014, 10:08 pm

    BTW Luvvie, I knew that was Janelle Monae from the minute I saw the pictures. I’d definitely recognise her at Target and freak out. Lol!

  • howling banshee November 16, 2014, 10:11 pm

    Yes MA’AM!

    Queen Celestine Beyince is … she just is. Everything. Just standing there all poised and perfect like “I’m so glad my baby is the world’s fiercest fashionista, because otherwise I would be outshining her on her wedding day without even trying.”

    Now we just gotta wait for the churchiest wedding of the century (you know that’s how Michelle will do it) and my “growing up with Beyonstiny’s Child” experience will be complete.

  • Petranilla November 16, 2014, 10:13 pm

    You couldn’t just leave is with this well written post. Luvvie, you yourself had to SLAY us with …
    ” P.S. I don’t even mind too much that Beyonce showed up dressed like Mariah Carey in that spaghetti strap dress with lucite heels.”

    YASSSS LUVVIE!! you also slay the interwebs!!!!!

  • Mel November 16, 2014, 10:20 pm

    I lost my mind when I saw this!!!! SLAY! Mama Tina look GOODT! And I’m kinda glad Beyonce is dressed like Mariah Carey…she looks like a regular chick. I love it! Solange looks amazing 😀

    • Mel November 16, 2014, 10:22 pm

      Mama Tina looks GOODT and DELIVERT!

  • jcanwisegrrl November 16, 2014, 10:21 pm

    Just saw some pics indicating that Solange had an allergic reaction to something and broke out in hives. Oh dear! That’d just ruin my day and piss me the hell off. Ugh!

  • Goodgrl1121 November 16, 2014, 10:33 pm

    So, blue-shoes-girl thought today was the day she needed to be an individual? She must be a cousin. Only family gets away with trying to get in the way.

    • Luvvie November 16, 2014, 10:37 pm

      Yeah that’s cousin Angie Beyince. She also looks like she’s in “The Ring” but I’ma let her have it on today.

    • Lauren November 17, 2014, 12:08 pm

      THANK YOU! Blue shoes girl thought it was her chance to shine; standing there with her legs spread like she’s Cousin It and getting frisked by five-o. #nope

  • JN November 16, 2014, 10:36 pm

    LOL @ that one lil line about Beyonce. #subtleshade

  • Katori November 16, 2014, 11:00 pm

    But about this!->”Now Kanye’s like “Oh. So that’s why Jay hasn’t replied to my WhatsApp message all day.”
    I’m done with you, Luvvie. I have no more laughs left in me: Kanye and Jay on WhatsApp like the rest of us regular folk!

  • glamazini November 16, 2014, 11:23 pm

    my my my my my my my #slowclap #glamaziniapproved

  • Milaxx November 17, 2014, 12:19 am

    Kanye mad people more impressed with this than that stupid flower wall he took 4 days to edit.

    Angie & Brad mad Julez wore a plain white suit and white sneakers and didn’t make his mama put his scribblings all over her fly white cape.

    Solange wins!

  • bolu November 17, 2014, 12:29 am

    OMG!!!!….. “sperm landing on the uterus of two people who ain’t named Tina. All his dirt was gonna sully all the white clothes and dry cleaning bills are TOO DAMB HIGH. So yeah, he’s busy”

    YOU are too much luvvie

  • Erika November 17, 2014, 2:41 am

    All that wedding mythology about the bride wearing white to be the center of attention? Yeah… Everyone is in white and yet none captures your gaze like Solange. If I could just touch the hem of her cape, I shall be blessed with heavenly edges…

    • Flyy November 17, 2014, 9:09 am

      THIS.

      I’m getting married soon and idc who wears white… it’s my wedding and BISHE if you that confused about who the bride is b/c someone else has on white, then maybe you should leave. Go home confused guest, you’re drunk.

    • LadyLarke November 17, 2014, 9:47 am

      All. Of. THIS!!! Solange is my spirit animal. I LOVE how she broke the internet without taking her clothes off

      • Tonia November 17, 2014, 5:30 pm

        Yes! Her pocketbook( showing my age) did NOT have to be on displayed to get attention. That’s why the nameless one stays losing IMO.

    • Leslie The Geek November 17, 2014, 9:55 am

      You touch that cape and your edges be LAYDT for the rest of your life!

  • Carla Wynker November 17, 2014, 4:25 am

    Solange looks FIERCE!!!! SHe’s just so georgeous I wish I was her. Her husband is a lucky man. And her fro is perfect. I don’t know who did her hair for the wedding, but that person deserves a thumb up. Seeing her like that make me kinda want to try having a fro. A thing I really like about Beyonce is that she never tries to outshine her little sister. She’s such a good big sis. By the way that girl in the blue shoes, is she serious? Like she couldn’t find a pair of white shoes. But whatever, there was only one queen and that was Solange.

    By the way, Luvvie you’re completely right, somwhere Kanye must be mad as hell. And I’m sure Kim must be like why didn’t I think about it first!

  • Luvlee November 17, 2014, 4:38 am

    Solange made getting married look effortless. She showed up and showed out in every way. #NaturallySlayAllDay http://youtu.be/yTMS5hYzELA

    • LuvLee November 17, 2014, 11:42 am

      2 Cute #NoFlexZone http://vimeo.com/m/112056887

      • jcanwisegrrl November 17, 2014, 1:43 pm

        ALL THE CUTES!!!!!
        SN: Just how many outfit changes did Solo have doe? I’ve seen about three dresses and a second jumpsuit.

  • mzmiamiheat November 17, 2014, 6:51 am

    Three simple words:

    She did that.

  • Michele November 17, 2014, 8:40 am

    Solange’s wedding couture more than makes up for that 1980s prom dress she fished out the dumpster for the Met Gala elevator hijinks. Fierce.

  • suzy November 17, 2014, 9:38 am

    Is that Elise Neal?

  • Chantal November 17, 2014, 11:08 am

    I am STILL RECOVERING!!! The proof is in this vlog reaction I made http://youtu.be/Vs_Ov9PHnqg And this blog post just took my life (in the best way possible) and have you seen Solange and Julez dancing to No Flex Zone?? I am incapable of going on.

  • Baby Girl November 17, 2014, 12:12 pm

    Somewhere, Matthew Knowles is seeking another woman to impregnate so in 25 years he can be invited to at least one of his progeny’s weddings.

  • That Dude November 17, 2014, 12:34 pm

    So, I kinda think Mama Tina was supposed to be graciously posing on the floor in the 2nd pic too (for symmetry), but told them “Do you see me in this dress? I’m not getting on no one’s floor” and they dealt.

    Beyonce’s hips & Janelle’s gams #doe #YesLawd

    • RaeJ November 17, 2014, 5:36 pm

      Okay…so you KNOW the photographer was getting everyone placed for the second shot and then turned to Ms. Celestine and was like…”ummm…yes…right where you are. Perfect” The photographer’s assistant whispered “it’s not symmetrical…she needs to sit down” and the photographer was like “Do YOU want to go tell a grown, mature and sure woman in her white ensemble to sit down…on the floor???” Yeah…that’s how that went down.

    • notconvincedgranny November 18, 2014, 12:20 am

      Who knew Ms. Monae was hiding THOSE LEGS under those tuxedos??!!

  • MzCafe November 17, 2014, 1:27 pm

    beautiful!! LOL at the upcoming pinterest pins -LOL…I too will be looking out for them in all the folks albums entitled “my dream wedding” -LOL

  • GuestOne November 17, 2014, 2:59 pm

    Now y’all know good and well if this was some unknown chicks picture y’all would be saying they look like a coven of DAMB witches…’cause they do! Don’t fake….
    Now, Solo is drop dead GORGEOUS. Girl is taking my breath away, but summa these folks in this picture look mighty homely. I’m not gonna point out who cause y’all KNOW you already see’em. These pics are ok. I’m not over the moon about them. Especially when they’re giving me American Horror Story realness. I guess New Orleans was quite fitting….chile please….

  • winnie roberts November 17, 2014, 3:03 pm

    #ClutchingMyPearls … I am speechless … these pics are everything and giving me so much life right now that I’m gon’ have to find me a future ex-husband just for the sake of mimicking the pics

  • Marcelo N November 17, 2014, 7:14 pm

    weo weo weo… now THIS is a wedding ensemble. Appropriate, neat, I’d even say angelic if that were not religious cliché. I’m not into worshipping celebrities for other than their talent, so I won’t focus on Famous Sister -though she looks some woman in that alphet, too.
    What is not cliché is the way they pulled this all off. And that pic on the sidewalk beside the groom, SensualWithoutBeingKimK. I kind of wonder what she (KK) might have felt as she saw the pix, that is, if there were any feelings left after she ate her heart out.

    • Marcelo N November 17, 2014, 7:37 pm

      PS: Counting the minutes #wellnotreally before we get all manner of Illuminati depiction/explanation of the pix, especially the second one. A good thing my dambs are running so scarce these days.
      Oh, and Cousin It in the Blue Shoes, well maybe some other time. Nice that someone tamed her #spreadeagle assitude for the second pic, doe not her #wigmalfunction

  • Jan November 17, 2014, 9:48 pm

    That photo is epic…but I do wonder why no one insisted on an outfit change for the girl in the last row wearing what appears to be a cotton pj pant and matching top.???

  • AC November 17, 2014, 9:56 pm

    Solange did every last piece of that and then some! Love every single thing about it!

    But why for (yes, why for) did some ratchets call themselves reenacting this in an Applebee’s? Looking like broke down cheerleaders 20 years after they have graduated high school. And before anyone asks, no, they are not in white. #HotMonkeyMess

  • Max November 17, 2014, 11:17 pm

    Solange outchea tryin to get me to renew my vows with my fro on swole. Everything about these pics is perfection. And the happiness is infectious too. Ugh! Just massive, massive slayage. And Mama Tina…shiiiiiiiiit. Easy, Breezy, Beautiful, Bad Bitch.

  • Reginia Cordell November 20, 2014, 2:13 am

    I want to post something thoughtful but the tears are streaming down my face. To Do List: Get a white outfit

  • Christie November 24, 2014, 8:27 am

    It looks perfect until you look at the girl in the back with the silver stripes and wonder why she went to The Limited Too for her outfit. The girl in the right on the floor made her pants out of a crocheted doily. But Solange looks amazing enough to cancel them out ’cause you know they were her wedding party obligation invites.

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