He Wanted to Look Like Kim Kardashian. $190,000 of Plastic Surgery Later, He Looks Like…
Idolizing a celebrity is one thing but attempting to change your face so you can look like your favorite is creepy and there’s a touch of some disorder there. I’m an armchair psychologist so I know this.
Jordan James Larke, a British “makeup artist” (I put that in quotation marks because bet nobody trust him to make THEM look amazing) loves Kim Kardashian so much that he went under the knife repeatedly to capture her look.
According to an Australian news site, “The 23-year-old’s had more than 50 cosmetic procedures to transform himself into a Kim lookalike, including Botox, lip fillers, eyebrow tattoos and laser hair removal.”
BEHOLD THE RESULT!
Jordan PAID a lot of money someone (or some people) to have him looking like Big Ang from “Mob Wives.” That is a mess. And I want to be mad on his behalf. The only way he looks like Kim Kardashian is if Kim had a bad reaction because she didn’t know she had an allergy to shellfish but she went to Red Lobster’s “All you can eat” shrimp fest and stuffed her face. That is the ONLY WAY.
And these eyebrows. What in all that is holy and un-fleek? Why does he have two strong black bars chilling above his face? It’s like he’s an upside down football player. Where are you going with these brows, Jordan?? I tweeted the other day about how I’m so sick of everyone and their “eyebrows on fleek.” FLEEK is officially synonymous with “drawn on and looking like the Count from Sesame Street.” I don’t have the time. Subtlety is so damb busy nowadays.
Again, this is someone who is supposedly a makeup artist. Does he specialize in costume makeup? Cuz if not, then NO THANK YOU! Worry about yourself.
This man got all this plastic surgery so he could look like Kim Kardashian after SHE got all the plastic surgery. It’s like FACE/OFF inception. And it’s a total fail because he’s looking like a muppet and I’m sad about that. How did he get here? Nobody’s ‘posed to be here.
It seems he’s loving his look, doe. Because his selfie game is STRONG, like his resting bitch face pout.
Look. If you’re gonna get plastic surgery, at least go to the best of the best so you don’t spend eternity looking like a blow up doll. Your goal should not be to look like the love child of Donatella Versace and Kermit the Frog.
NOPE. Bless this utter mess. Looking like the Pinterest fail version of Nori’s mama. He’s the reason why we need 75 different ways to say “Fix It Jesus.” #MendItMoses. #BindItBuddha. #VelcroItVishnu
In the words of Queen RuPaul, “If you don’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?” AMEN!