Someone Sent Me a Business Email Addressed “Hi Zamunda…”

Zamunda Name Tag

I am Luvvie everywhere on these interwebs and offline. I am HELLA Google-able and easy to find. My site is called AwesomelyLuvvie.com. I am @Luvvie on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter. LUVVIE LUVVIE LUVVIE.

So… two days ago, I get an email that made me roll my eyes so hard that  needed visine to set my pupils back straight. Why? Because they emailed me about promoting a miniseries happening in February. They wanted me to help them amplify it, and the email began with “Hi Zamunda…”

Yes. THEY THOUGHT MY NAME WAS ZAMUNDA! In fact, just see the screenshot below.

Zamunda Name

COMME DES FACKONS! I have SO many questions but I want to lay the facts out first.

1. My email address is Luvvieblog at gmail.com

b. My name is in my signature, which is at the very bottom of every email I reply to.

iii. My name is Luvvie on the “address” line where it tells you what the person’s name is.

So this man is completely clueless as to what my name is. In spite of ALL of that. Now I wanna ask my questions.

questions gif

Questions. I haz them.

a. Is Google busy? I mean it. Did Google go on lunch break and not come back yet? If he was SO CLUELESS of my name, is Google not one click away?

ii. Did the actors who told him to contact me not tell him my name? Maybe they referred to me as “That Black blogger who is always ranting about some shit and she got the cartoon.” That must be it.

3. Where did he get the idea that my name is ZAMUNDA? The only place it’s referenced is that it’s my Twitter location. Bonus: so there are actually people who’ve never seen “Coming to America” huh? Well the sender of this email wasn’t Black so maybe he hasn’t seen it. Still…

Zamunda Money

The tea in all this? The miniseries he wants me to help promote is about Black people, and for Black History Month, and he called me Zamunda. I was thinking about possibly watching it too but I’m not so pressed now. If this is someone representing it, and they’re this clueless, what does it say for the rest of the work?

I want to contact the actors that he said sent him my way and let them know that this is the janky way someone is going out to try to get them press. Do they know? I actually like the work of one of them too. I wanna be all “Ma’am, dude gotchu out there bogus.” I need to dig for her contact info, doe.

Ok so after the screenshot above, we had one more exchange.

Zamunda Name 2

I wanted to hit him with the Magic Mike “Don’t be sorry, hoe. Be careful.” So… You thought LUVVIE wasn’t my name because it was possibly just an online persona. But ZAMUNDA was more likely what my real name is. You thought that was a safer guess. You’d rather go with the one that is the name of a made up country from a movie.

Oh. At least he didn’t call me Kunta Kinte. I woulda preferred Jaffe Joffer, doe. (-_-)

I get emails addressed wrongly ALL the time (*side-eye* to PR people who don’t do any research). Folks be outchea calling me everything but Awesomely Luvvie. I’ma start changing my name weekly. Diabolically Luvvie. Amazingly Luvvie. Shadefully Luvvie. I got quoted on Yahoo earlier this week as “Awesomely Lovely.” But THIS? This is a new level of fail and I need people to get it together.

The moral of this story is: please hire proven professionals to represent youEveryone CANNOT do PR. If you want/need my help with something, get my name right.

Update: He sent me an email saying he sees that I’m “trolling” on social media. Sir, I’m not trolling you. I’m DRAGGING you. There’s a difference. Bless his heart. But at least he got my name right this time.

He told me that he’s foreign and he didn’t know my name (although Google comes in all languages but ok). I told him that it reflects poorly on those he represents that he didn’t even know my name. I accepted his apology, doe. He just gotta do better next time. Dassall. 

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • DWJ January 29, 2015, 1:59 pm

    I was emailing back and forth with my web hosting company once and in my email signature I have a quote from Willy Wonka. After a long string of emails between various people, I got an email that said, ‘Dear Willy Wonka…’ WTH?! I feel your pain.

    • Ambar P. January 29, 2015, 2:24 pm

      I’m not sure if I’d be ticked off or find that hilarious.

    • Guyanese Sista January 29, 2015, 4:59 pm

      AHAHAHHAHAHAHA!

    • Drea Renee January 29, 2015, 7:10 pm

      Bwahahaha! #iCant

    • Ally January 29, 2015, 7:15 pm

      I just audibly snorted while laughing at that.

    • Suebob January 29, 2015, 11:55 pm

      Plz send everlasting gobstoppers KTHXBAI!!

  • Emti January 29, 2015, 2:03 pm

    HAHAHA this is my daily life (I’m thinking about writing a book). My name is Mansa (the name is from Ghana). While at work I have been called the following to my face and in writing (when people are emailing me to an address that has my name!!!!)

    Menses, Samantha, Nancy, Melissa, Nasa, Mazda (because I’m a car), Rhonda, Amanda. The list goes on…

    • Tammy January 29, 2015, 3:45 pm

      I hollered! Not Mazda! Turble…

    • Suebob January 29, 2015, 11:57 pm

      There’s a great site my friend Laurie Writes set up: Hello My Fucking Name is…

      http://myfuckingnameis.tumblr.com/

    • Maggie January 30, 2015, 1:07 am

      Menses? Oh God I am so sorry.

      I can just picture the side-eye that person got. “Yes, that’s right, my mama named me after HER PERIOD.”

    • phylligurl January 31, 2015, 9:33 pm

      There is a woman on my job whose name is Toy Ohta – I’m not even lying. Her parents must not like her…

  • Malcomisha X January 29, 2015, 2:04 pm

    THIS. IS NOT. REAL. LIFE!
    Did he get his PR degree from Everest college? Was he wearing his Stevie Wonder filtered glasses whilst writing this email? Was GOD, Jesus AND the Holy Ghost busy?
    SWAY THE ANSWERS WERE RIGHT THERE!!!!!

  • Cindy January 29, 2015, 2:12 pm

    Zamunda needs a Tumblr.

    • Luvvie January 29, 2015, 2:30 pm

      LOL I bet it already has one. Because: Tumblr and randomness go together like that.

  • Ms. Brome January 29, 2015, 2:13 pm

    Is the project “The Book Of Negroes”?

    • Shannyn January 30, 2015, 11:50 am

      That was my guess too. The author and the production are Canadian. No excuse but yeah…

  • JWerd January 29, 2015, 2:15 pm

    That is positively awful! They were using the Siri from 2013 update.. maybe that was their dilemma *clutches pearls*

  • Nic January 29, 2015, 2:23 pm

    1. Saw you mentioned he was White on Twitter. Says a lot to me…because he’s probably simply clueless. I looked at your twitter bio, and it says next to Zamunda (I’m the Kween to be)…of course BLACK PEOPLE (unless you were raised in a far, far, away land) get the reference…I wouldn’t be quick to assume a White person would.

    2. Is he a publicist? If so, then yes, he should think about a new field…the right thing to do would have been to click on “Contact”, where he would have seen “Luvvie”…but then, let’s think again. If he’s a white guy that maybe doesn’t know anything about you, could he have thought the name of the company was “Luvvie”? Keep in mind when you go to your contact page, it’s written in the 1st person (I get it) but for someone who isn’t here often, it may be a bit tricky. A (good) publicist gets to know their subjects (read articles on the site) before they “pitch” which I didn’t see one…so that makes me think that’s not his “thing”. Most folks with short films have no budget whatsoever…not saying that’s OK, but yeah…

    3. He apologized sincerely.

    I think you are overreacting…you have accomplished a lot, and will likely do soooooo much more. Maybe this movie/short film of his will suck. However, he was referred to you by actors from the film…I’m thinking they are black – so I don’t think they’d say to the White guy “yeah, that black girl with the blog…”…just my thoughts looking from my side of the computer.

    • Luvvie January 29, 2015, 2:30 pm

      Are you new here? Do you realize that I make fun of A LOT of absurd things that happen? Something tells me that you think I’m at home smashing things right now. Well, I’m not. Also, I accept his janky apology. He gotta do better, doe.

      • Nic January 29, 2015, 3:08 pm

        I guess you could say, yes, I am new here. No, I don’t think you are breaking things or anything like that either, lol. I read a post recently where you mentioned you are a comedienne, so I get the jist of this post…just sharing my perspective…and thank you for your reply…I wasn’t expecting to be drug for filth, but as I discovered more details via your timeline, I realized this was a lesson in how things get “lost in translation…”

      • Nicole Seguin January 29, 2015, 5:42 pm

        Dayummit “Are you new here ” I cant stop laughing all day at this Zamunda crap. This is what we live for …

    • DB January 29, 2015, 2:30 pm

      Sssshhhh… Here’s a chair. Be seated.

      • Nic January 29, 2015, 3:14 pm

        I should sit because?…

        Get over yourself please. My apologies if not everyone has visited this blog before and know ‘all things Luvvie.’ So you can turn that seat around and sit as well. If you were paying attention to the timeline, Luvvie did mention he was “foreign…” which says a lot to me. I actually was one of the first people who responded “Google is your friend…” via Twitter.

        So back to those seats…feel free to sit all the way down as per your suggestion to me.

  • Denise January 29, 2015, 2:39 pm

    White girl here. I watched every Eddie Murphy at least twelves times. I hollared at your Zamunda foolishness.

    Was I not supposed to do that? Am I only to laugh at white movies? I’m so confused here… didn’t know I wasn’t supposed to love Golden Child!

    • Luvvie January 29, 2015, 2:43 pm

      I was tryna give him SOME type of out. But yeah…

  • milaxx January 29, 2015, 2:45 pm

    The last time I saw a name mix up this stupid was the 2 young ladies on twitter who named their start up “Strange Fruit” and then couldn’t understanding why they got dragged.

    Seriously people, it’s 2015. Google is your friend.

  • Sarah H January 29, 2015, 2:46 pm

    You know how when you’re thinking about something and writing about something else. And the thing you’re thinking about end up in your writing. Maybe that’s what happened with this dude. Like, he must have been thinking “where is Zamunda” while he was writing and that’s why it ended up in his mail. That’s the only explanation I have for his silliness. If he really thought your name was Zamunda, then there’s something wrong with him, lol.

  • Whitney January 29, 2015, 2:55 pm

    Was he an intern?

  • Sili January 29, 2015, 2:56 pm

    I get all kinds of interesting emails with all kinds of names that I am not sure where they pull from. They fail right from the beginning because like you said, it’s not that difficult. I love that he said you were trolling him. That poor child don’t know who he’s messing with. Excuse me while I go grab popcorn before heading over to Twitter!

    oxoxox

  • KK January 29, 2015, 2:56 pm

    So he couldn’t research to find your name but he “sees you trolling” on social media. Sir. Door please.

    • Ang January 29, 2015, 11:18 pm

      Right. He used the foreign card, but came back with trolling. Que? Doesn’t work that way buddy. Either Lizzy Mazellia is going to rap/talk like she’s black, and support, or just be Australian all the time. Pick a team.

  • Constance January 29, 2015, 3:17 pm

    Mr. Wrong on all levels, in all languages sent you an email saying you was trolling him. You should’ve said I’m not trolling you. Zamunda is.
    I haven’t laughed so hard all week. Thank you Outstandingly Luvvie!

  • Christina Joy January 29, 2015, 3:41 pm

    Years ago my mother had return labels printed that had her first and last name, address and under the address in a different font it said “Jesus is Lord”….all scripty and nice. Well somehow she got on some mailing list as Jesus Lord so we started getting a lot of mail to our house addressed to Jesus Lord. Sigh…..

    • eulalia January 29, 2015, 4:25 pm

      my place in hell has already been reserved (i’ll be the one at the reception desk wearing a headset), so i’ma go ahead and ask this – did your mother ever get telemarketing calls asking to speak with “jesus lord?”

      • Tootie January 29, 2015, 6:11 pm

        Time of death: 7:12pm EST

        • Suebob January 29, 2015, 11:59 pm

          When the roll is called up yonder…

    • Tesha January 29, 2015, 10:41 pm

      Hallelujah be some virtue cause all of my bottom just fell off from laughing at this. I’ll be the one at the one at the receptionist desk with training wheels on my skates..still laughing at this

    • Tesha January 29, 2015, 10:41 pm

      Hallelujah be some virtue cause all of my bottom just fell off from laughing at this. I’ll be the one at the one at the receptionist desk with training wheels on my skates..still laughing at this

    • cathy January 31, 2015, 5:34 pm

      No. Just….no. this should be a crime. Jesus Lord save me! #notyomamatheotherone #deathbylaughter

  • Deja Burt January 29, 2015, 3:57 pm

    always that one person who is so sincere with their comment…if you feel compelled to break down your response into bullet points, you should already know youre about to do too much…
    #AbbreviateItAllah

  • Ashley January 29, 2015, 4:16 pm

    I mean to be fair, I thought Luvvie was your pseudonym as well. Like mahogany curls, Rick Ross or something like that. I realized that was your actual name maybe a year ago ( only because I think you were referring to yourself in the third person).

    He should have done more research, but I see how the mistake was made.
    I think it is less acceptable because it is what his job entails, but I don’t understand why people with unique names get so bothered by the mistake.

    • Luvvie January 29, 2015, 4:20 pm

      If someone walks up to Rick Ross and says “I don’t know your name b/c I figure Rick Ross is a stage name” would he be mad because someone called him “Rick Ross?”

      “I don’t understand why people with unique names get so bothered by the mistake.”

      Sooooo if someone called you SARAH instead of ASHLEY, you’d be all “that’s cool.” Yeah. Ok.

    • Ang January 29, 2015, 11:23 pm

      Chile STAPH! I will still call Rick Ross RICK ROSS. I’m not going to be all Mr. Richard Rossenberg, how did you lose all that weight? Nope, but I have a “can” on layaway. Imma letcha know when I get it out.

  • Candice January 29, 2015, 5:14 pm

    Even ignoring the fact that google is real…Zamunda? #comeonson

    • Pookie B. Lovey January 29, 2015, 11:16 pm

      EGGZACKLY. White girl here, big-time Eddie Murphy lovable. “Hi Zamunda” had me HOWLING.

  • Kari January 29, 2015, 5:23 pm

    Also… he referred to it as an “online blog.” As opposed to all those blogs that are not online.

  • Stacey January 29, 2015, 5:37 pm

    I don died. Did he really just email Dear Zamunda. #blesshisheart

  • Tiffany January 29, 2015, 5:47 pm

    Can you please make a shirt with that Bank Of Zamunda peso on it tho!!!

    • Yaasha Abraham January 30, 2015, 9:55 pm

      That really needs to become a thing. Like raht nah!

  • Tia January 29, 2015, 8:18 pm

    I was #crine laughing at this, but thinking I want a COMME DES FACKONS shirt at the same damb time. LOL

    • Traci January 30, 2015, 12:35 pm

      PLEASE sign me up to get one of those tee shirts! lol

  • Rauney January 29, 2015, 8:50 pm

    LOL! I laughed so hard. The poor fella.

  • Travelogged January 29, 2015, 9:24 pm

    This was hilarious — thank you for the laugh. Sorry this happened and glad you could laugh about it.

  • Sandy January 29, 2015, 9:43 pm

    The fifth word on my blog is my name and it’s on my sidebar on EVERY page. I get way too many messages each week addressed to God only knows who. I don’t even respond to those anymore.

  • Sharon January 30, 2015, 12:48 am

    But these microagressions!!!!! We come against them in the name of black Jesus. Really? Za-bloody-munda???? White people can’t be bothered to know our names…because, you know, we are “other”.

    “I’m just going to call you Sarah…”
    “No girl. If you can bother to say “Yves Saint Laurent” correctly, you are gonna say Boyani Makiya…mmkay”

    So annoying.

    • Marki February 4, 2015, 11:34 am

      “No girl. If you can bother to say “Yves Saint Laurent” correctly, you are gonna say Boyani Makiya…mmkay”.. this isht RIGHT HERE??!!! LMFAOOOOOOO!!!! I. Am. DIED.

  • LaShon @ For the Love of Curls January 30, 2015, 12:50 am

    Your story was bad enough but some of the comments had be in stitches – I can’t imagine being called Willy Wonka, Mazda, and Jesus is Lord. Hilarious!!

  • Gina January 30, 2015, 11:47 am

    This is for all of those sensitive folk who feel the need to defend this incompetent ninny. I don’t care who the person is, well known or unknown, if you are contacting them KNOW WHO THEY ARE! This is true even for basic job interview. For example, I have seen countless people thank an author for accepting them on Facebook then say “Now what have you written?” The blankest of stares. It is simply disrespectful. And dude’s excuse “I didn’t know that was your real name” was LAME! Do you really think Queen Latifah is going to be like “No my name is Dana”? Do you think Marilyn Monroe would’ve been like “Chyle that is my stage name. Call me Norma Jean.” So to the defenders of this supreme fxckery…You are the part of the problem. You are the tribe of folks that would stop someone coming out of a toilet stall and ask for their autograph, you are the ones confusing Kenya for Beyoncé (I am kidding that never actually happened), you are among those that would confuse Samuel L. Jackson for Laurence Fishburne, you are the lazy sods that won’t take 5 seconds to research anything on Google. You are waiting for Bill Gates to send you money from sharing that status or forwarding that email, you believe that picture of money is going to bring you a blessing, you believe Meagan Good is replacing Kerry Washington on Scandal… I am done. I am still trying to process that last episode OF Scandal.

    • Traci January 30, 2015, 12:33 pm

      You just made me laugh out loud ALL over again reading your reply!!! LOL LOL LOL !

      • Gina January 30, 2015, 3:24 pm

        Traci girl! LOL, folks just make me tired!

  • Traci January 30, 2015, 12:26 pm

    This made me giggle from somewhere deep inside and just the giggle I needed on this dreary foggy day! I do hope he realizes saying “My Bad” just doesn’t cut it for this faux pas! LOL!

  • howlingbanshee January 30, 2015, 4:45 pm

    That whole Zamunda thing is a hot raggedy mess but I have to say, the “Awesomely Lovely” bit did warm my heart a little. Yahoo actually made a “good” oopsie for once. Awwww.

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