TV

Empire’s Season Finale Was Two Hours of Grand Drama

What Lee Daniels’ newest show Empire has managed to do is no small feat. Their soundtrack is currently the #1 music album in the country, beating out Madonna’s latest release. And the new show is the #1 show on the Big 4 networks, breaking its own rating records week after week. Why? Because we all miss having soap operas aka “Stories” to watch and since All My Children ain’t coming back, Cookie Lyon an’ em are the fix we’ve been needing.

Empire Logo

I recapped the first 2 episodes of Empire when I first watched them and I knew I’d be a fan because as the foolery enthusiast that I am, this was up my alley. By the time the finale of season 1 came around last night, everyone was on level THIRST to see what would happen. Chile… A LOT. That’s what happened.

The first hour didn’t give me visual whiplash, although it ended with 18 things happening in the last 5 minutes. But the 2nd hour? Listen. From top down it was continuous, and I think it must have been before the show’s team realized they were renewed for season 2. So they jam-packed it with stuff in case it was the last hurrah. Let’s talk about it, doe.

* Cookie’s Cookies – Cookie is at a getaway in the woods with Malcolm (Derek Luke) the fine ass security guard, getting her cookies OFF and I ain’t mad at it.

Cookie Malcolm 1 Cookie Malcolm 2

Turns out that she’s never been with anyone but slimy ass Lucious so this was extra special. When Lucious figures out that they’re together, upon her return, he tells her she is out the company and not on the Board of Directors because a convicted felon can never serve on the board of a publicly traded company. Is this true? What about Martha Stewart? I have real questions!

Security escorts her off the premises and I’m like gahtdamb. Lucious is a summabitch! Men and their fragile ass egos. ALLLL THE PEEN SPREADING HE DON DID? STAHP. Men be so butthurt about things being done to them but they’ll act all types of complete fools and expect forgiveness. “Cuz Hell wants the devil back and Lucious is on his way.” – Cookie Lyon the Gawdess.

* Showcase Showboat – Uncle Snoop Lyon (HEEE) shows up and Lucious has a mini showcase for the legend, where he rocks out like only he can. Then Hakeem gets on stage and basically calls his Daddy wack and says he slept with his woman. CHILEEEEEE… Lucious catches his son outside and knocks him DAFUQ OUT!

Lucious punch out

It’s not Hakeem’s fault. He be emo as hell. He missed so many “I HATE YOU MOM AND DAD” moments as a teenager. He’s making up for it now.

* Future of Empire – With Hakeem on his Twitter block list, Andre in therapy and Cookie on his butthurt list, Lucious turns to Jamal The Geigh Son because he has writer’s block and he needs to come up with a song for the “Lucious Lyons Sound” concert. Jamal takes him to their old house where Past Du-Rag Wearing Lucious got his start. There, they rock out as Lucious rocks a linen blazer like it’s not the middle of winter. “I don faced death from both sides since I was 9 years old.” Is that why you’re wearing summer fabric winter? You ain’t scurred? I bet Lucious Lyon wears white loafers. You know he got a Nigerian friend who got him a pair.

Anywho, Jamal helps him write a song he thinks it’s dope and it’s a turning point in their relationship because for once, his GEIGH didn’t get in the way of his talent. O_____O Tale as old as time, really. It is here that Lucious tells him that he’s the future of the company, and he challenges him to do something to earn it. Get his music masters from Beretti, who has filed an injunction against him.

All Falls Down – All hells breaks loose after this. Jamal goes to Beretti’s place and hems him up, holding him over a balcony, threatening to drop him if he doesn’t sign papers giving Lucious the rights to his old music. Linen Lyon shows up and doesn’t stop his son. He goes looking for his other heir, Hakeem, who is threatening to jump ship to Creedmore Records. He finds Baby Lyon (No Simba) making the secks with Anika (Boo Boo Kitty). EEEWWWWW.

Lucious has been experiencing double vision. This is actually good news because his doctor realizes that it means MG (Myasthenia Gravis), not ALS, and that is treatable, though chronic. The devil surely doesn’t go down easy. With this new lease on life, Linen Lyon goes to see Andre, who has now found Jesus through his holy music therapist (who it’s clear he’s in love with), played by J-Hud. To spite his son, he walks up to her and gives her a record deal on the spot. “My father is the devil and you just spread your legs for him.” Ouch. Way harsh.

Lucious is on his new MG drugs, which apparently, make you hallucinate so when he gets in bed and is about to sleep, he sees Bunkie’s ghost sitting at the foot. IF THIS AIN’T A SOAP OPERA FOR REAL. I LOVE IT. Anywho, Cookie comes into her ex’s bedroom and he starts talking groggily to himself and admits that he killed Bunkie, her cousin.

Not Dying 1 Not dying 2

He laid all his secrets at her feet, and I had thought no one would end up knowing that he wasn’t really dying. Cookie is hurt and mad as hell, and hovers over him with a pillow. Will she kill him? Part 1 (hour 1) ends.

And I didn’t realize I had been waiting to exhale until I let go of a deep breath. Everything in “All Falls Down” happened in like a 4 minute span. IT WAS TOO MUCH.

* Gifts for Lyons – A new episode kicked off here where they left off and it’s morning time. The Lyon sons are around the table, sitting in front of black boxes with gold ribbons. Becky’s present and Hakeem asks her what kind of Black girl is named Becky. She says she got a white mama. Well den.

White mama becky

Lucious greets his sons says he is not dying, and apologizes for being a shitty person. I coulda SWORN it was a dream sequence.

He tells them to open up the boxes in front of them. Hakeem opens his up and there’s a gold wing. He got a private jet that he can use to tour all over the world. Creflo Dollar is somewhere MAD AS HELL. Andre opens his up and it’s a gold cross. He’s getting $100 million to use for the Lyons Foundation and fund his heart’s desires (aka Jesus). Jamal opens his up and it’s a gold scepter. HE gets Empire. WOOOORRRDDDD?????? Oh ok, den! Cookie walks in looking all shifty-eyed and he tells her to come open her box. She does, and it’s a pillow. WELP. He knows what she almost did.

* Checkmate, Bitch – Cookie goes to see Lucious in his office and Jamal is there. Linen Lyon tells his younger son that his mama almost killed him the night before. Cookie forgot that her bae Malcolm has installed security cameras all through the mansion so as the footage of her holding the pillow over him plays, Jamal is devastated. She tells her son that his pops killed Bunkie as security drags her out.

Cookie Lucious 1 Cookie Lucious 2

“Sometimes you gotta be willing to sacrifice your Queen in order to win the game.” Said the evil ass King of Empire chess.

* No Snitching – After Cookie sees her named wiped from the Lucious Lyon Sounds concert, she is dragged into a car by the Feds lady. They’re building a case against her ex and they want her to testify against him. I wouldn’t blame Cookie if she snitches on him either. She’s already gone down for him once and she bet not do it again. Shit. Ride-or-die is so overrated. I’m more of a “Ride or See now you’re tripping and if it’s either you or me, I’m picking me type” chick. As she exits the building, Vernon watches her, trailing Cookie on the command of Lucious. He reports back and says she’s not up to much, just going to see her Parole Officer and home.

* Lying Like Lyon – There’s a press conference where Lucious announces Jamal as the heir to this throne, one of the rappers at Empire comes out to heckle Jamal for his sexuality. Lucious responses talmbout “Bigotry has no place at Empire” and that is how I KNOW this is all a setup. That dude cannot be trusted and how did he become a new person overnight, basically??? NAWL. What he’s going to do is use that as an example of why he can’t really leave the company to him, when he finally dethrones his son. Don’t believe me just watch.

* Fight Night – Cookie tells Hakeem that they should take Empire back, and he tells Andre. They go see Boo Boo Kitty because she got connections that could make this hostile takeover work. Cookie, being the goon that she is, feels disrespected by Anika so she straight STEALS on her face and punches her dead in her eye. Fake ass Lena Horne gets a few punches in, but Cookie snatches her pearls off and mollywhops her on a pool table before they’re separated.

Run Pearls 1 Run Pearls 2

Oh and Andre’s wife tells him she’s leaving him because even though he hasn’t physically cheated with his music therapist, they’ve shared some “intimate” moments. Ummm… I didn’t even know she was mad at him. They definitely skipped some important part on this section because she hadn’t ever mentioned her to him yet now she’s leaving him? This was a bit of a hole.

* 8 Mile Road – The rapper that came for Jamal was having some event at some basement that straight took me to 8-Mile Road. I started rapping “Sometimes I just feel like, quitting I still might” immejately. You can’t blame me. Anywho, ‘Mal gets on stage and annihilates him with a sing-rap that was in all falsetto and ended in “BITCCCHHH” and I lived.

Jamal 1 Jamal 2

Now, anytime I read someone, I will attempt to do it in high key. You’re welcome.

* Cookie’s Baby – As this plotting against Empire is happening, I kept wondering why Cookie wasn’t at least trying to talk to Jamal because she loves her son and the hostile takeover will take him down too. Finally, they have a convo about it she tells him “No matter what’s going on between me and your daddy, I got you.” Cookie doesn’t let me down often.

* V for Vernon – Vernon shows up at Andre’s house and says he’d like to talk but the oldest Lyon son isn’t in the talking mood. He feels betrayed by Uncle Vernon so he pushes him and punches him in the face. The men start rumbling, and at first, Vernon tries to keep Dre at bay but it turns into real fisticuffs and he’s pummeling his play nephew. Just then, Rhonda (his wife) comes in and hits Vernon in the head with some blunt object, and he hits the floor. She tells Andre that she wants to work on their marriage and make the shit work. Dre got a massive black eye and bloody mouth and he looks at Vernon, who is still on the floor, unconscious. There’s a pool of blood under his head and he has no pulse. OMG RHONDA KILLED VERNON!! Dambit!

Andre wants to call 911 and say it was self-defense but Rhonda tells him not to. Also, she’s pregnant. WTF? I don’t know what her uterus gotta do with the fact that she just murdered someone but ok.

* Public Empire – The Lyons are all standing at the New York Stock Exchange bell about to ring it when Lucious tells the rep that they gotta wait for Vernon because he helped build the company. When they do, Empire will officially become a publicly-traded company. Andre (in shades) and his wife are standing there and the NYSE waits for no one, so Lucious presses the button and it is official!

* Dwight Walker – At the Lucious Lyon Sounds concert, Jamal is rocking what I think is an homage to his daddy’s Past Du-Rag onstage as he performs with Hakeem. After that set, as Lucious is backstage in his dressing room, prepping himself to perform, Jamal joins him. He lets his son in on a secret that even Cookie doesn’t know: Dwight Walker is his real name. When he became an orphan at 9, he figured that wouldn’t rock in the streets, so he created Lucious. “The One Who Could Not Be Killed.” Soooo basically, he’s Voldemort. I wonder what he’s turned into horcruxes. You know he’s killed before. MMHMM.

Before he can get onstage, the Feds barge in and say he’s under arrest for the murder of Bunkie. AW SHIT. Cookie walks in and he calls her a snitch. He tells Jamal to go represent for him and his son looks at his mama all hatefully. NAWLLL IT WASN’T COOKIE. One of the federal agents tells the other that they are still looking for Vernon because he’s their star witness. MMHMM Uncle V was the snitch but since he’s gone now.

The show ends with a long shot of prison cells and Lucious’ wabble voice. “The streets couldn’t defeat me. Disease couldn’t stop me. Even God can’t kill me. The day will come when Lucious Lyon will return. Game time, bitches.”

Game Time Bitches Empire

WELPPP!


Coupla things:

* Lucious is gonna come back with a vengeance and fuck shit up.

* GAHTDAMBIT, RHONDA LADY! She killed Vernon and you KNOW she ain’t take any blame for it. Y’all gon have to start paying the Usher Board overtime money because they stay busy with these TV funes!

* Jamal stepped into his father’s shoes comfortably and I want him to remain good. I don’t want him to turn into a villain in season 2! People in hell want ice water too so… O_o

* I really do enjoy watching Cookie mollywhop Boo Boo Kitty

* Cookie and Jamal’s relationship is in the gutter and that makes me sad because their bond was one of my favorite things so far. I need them to come back together again and plot against Lucious together.

Cookie Jamal

There is a good reason why TV shows are best in 1 hour increments because 2 hours of high drama like Empire served up for their season 1 finale almost took me out. It was so much and they’re gonna make a G hypertensive. Afterwards, I had to eat an energy bar but I’m a glutton for punishment though. Alls I know is, DIS. TEW. MUCH. The last 2 episodes were like 1 whole season worth of storylines all by themselves.

P.S. I need that song that Jamal and Patti LaBelle performed on stage. It went kinda hard in the ballad paint and I’m here for it.

Whatcha think of the finale?

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69 Comments

  1. K
    March 19, 2015 at 12:30 pm

    I alerted the usher board to start planning my fune after that finale because I was slayed. It was tew much.

  2. Mica
    March 19, 2015 at 12:33 pm

    The season finale had me on the edge of my seat and drinking like a fish…I’m so here for Jamal and his boo thang…The entire fight scene had me tickled pink especially RUN THEM PEARLS HOE

    • Lexi
      March 20, 2015 at 3:47 pm

      I dieeeeeed when run them pearls hoe commenced!!!

    • IFYouEverComeBack
      March 20, 2015 at 10:00 pm

      Nah, I not here for Mr I-Can’t-Pick-An-Accent and his confusing hair.

  3. nik
    March 19, 2015 at 12:34 pm

    I have a feeling Lucious set cookie up in the bedroom scene. It was just too convenient that he started spilling his guts as soon as she walked in, plus he knew she was about to smother him and grabbed her hand.

    I agree, he set Jamal up…he never liked that boy.

    Jamal’s feelings toward his mother make no sense, he shouldn’t be so easy to turn against the only person that has ever been in his corner.

    Also, it’s very interesting how Lucious immediately knew the family had plotted against him. I think the snitch was vernon, but he was persuaded by BooBooKitty and/or Cookie.

    This finale has me weary, weak and worn today.

  4. Tracee
    March 19, 2015 at 12:34 pm

    I love your recaps!!! Ok, so I have some real questions here:

    1. How come as light skinned as Andre is he didn’t have not a one scratch on his face during the ringing of the bell? Did he use his wife’s make up or nah?

    2. Where in the world did they move the body of Vernon to?

    3. Was Vernon high when he snitched?

    4. Is it me, or was the finale really dark and goth?

    5. Why do all these hip hop moguls have God complexes?

    6. So who is Boo Boo Kitty’s stylist? That red pantsuit was er’thang!

    7. What does “Run dem pearls, ho” even mean?

    • Deelish
      March 19, 2015 at 1:17 pm

      “Run them pearls ho” is street vernacular for “Give me these pearls street woman of ill repute.”

      • TheItGyrl
        March 19, 2015 at 2:05 pm

        CRINE!!!!

      • Sarah D
        March 19, 2015 at 2:08 pm

        The cackle I just did at my desk rang far and wide.

      • Michele W
        March 19, 2015 at 2:14 pm

        Well damn….there you go!

      • mobaygurl
        March 19, 2015 at 2:33 pm

        think I pee’d a little Deelish. roflol!!!

      • vanitaapplebum
        March 19, 2015 at 2:40 pm

        And I immediately thought it was a play on Run The Jewels. And yeah, well same thing….okay, thanks for playing LOL

      • Kawanis
        March 20, 2015 at 8:05 am

        That was hilarious!! Litteraly crying at my desk!!

      • sHA
        March 20, 2015 at 10:32 am

        “Give me these pearls street woman of ill repute.” I die.

      • Lexi
        March 20, 2015 at 5:40 pm

        Not I’ll repute. Lol

  5. Evelyn
    March 19, 2015 at 1:02 pm

    I loved the finale but was also sad that Hakeem didn’t support Jamal. I loved their relationship as brothers. And Cookie didn’t know Luscious was Dwight? He never told her? Jamal and Ryan? That was a good scene.

    • Michele W
      March 19, 2015 at 2:16 pm

      A day later and I’m still messed up….Whose damn idea was it to thug out Jamal! NO ma’amsir! He is the best thing (next to Cookie) on the show. And the whole damn family turning their backs on Jamal? Ughhh. But Jamal and that falsetto BITCH was EVERYTHING!

  6. Nikky
    March 19, 2015 at 1:20 pm

    Phew! I think I’m gonna be weak all damn weakend. My edges will be laid to rest with Uncle Vernon cos I was not ready for that finale!

  7. Serenity
    March 19, 2015 at 1:20 pm

    So…. I guess their marriage wasn’t legal???? You can’t just be changing your name like that…

    And BooBoo Kitty and her biracial ass needed to have a few more bruises…..

    Rhonda… I just learned her name…. doesn’t have to worry. Not hing ever happens to blond white girl

  8. T
    March 19, 2015 at 1:31 pm

    I SO thought that whole gift box boardroom scene was a dream, and that Cookie was gon’ open her box and it would be her boyfriend’s head and she’d wake up screaming and stuff. But anyway.

    Perfect soap, all we need is amnesia and an evil twin. I’m loving it.

  9. cat
    March 19, 2015 at 1:36 pm

    Yeah I was so mad at Jamal for turning against Cookie so quickly. But it figures; most boys really crave the respect of their fathers and they’ll do anything to get it and keep it. He’s so tired of being the black sheep from childhood that now he’s made it to Boss he doesn’t want anything or anyone to spoil that – even his momma. All in all that was a crazy finale I didn’t even realise I was holding my breath till I started seeing Ol’ Bunky’s Ghost myself 🙂

  10. judy
    March 19, 2015 at 1:40 pm

    it was enjoyable but the bedroom dream scene was hokey as hell. Agree with the holes in the story as well as the problematic rapid character changes. Jamal and Luscious besties? Jamal and Hakeem enemies? Anybody hanging with Dre? I thought the 2nd half could have been tighter. At any rate… i’m with everyone else… HOOKED!

  11. Kayla
    March 19, 2015 at 1:45 pm

    Andre is gonna have another break down. The guilt of uncle vernon is gonna mess with him.

  12. Jameelah
    March 19, 2015 at 1:57 pm

    I bet Lucious Lyon wears white loafers. You know he got a Nigerian friend who got him a pair.

  13. TheItGyrl
    March 19, 2015 at 2:00 pm

    I read “Ride or See now you’re tripping” and almost died!!! Bwahahahahaha!!!

    • Muriel Sutton
      March 20, 2015 at 11:50 am

      When I read that line…..Karrueche came all up in my vizion

  14. Cat
    March 19, 2015 at 2:08 pm

    They took every soap opera trope ever written and plugged it into the finale – especially the last hour – and I LIVED!!! I knocked a whole bottle of Moscato off messing with Lee Daniels, child!

  15. danielle
    March 19, 2015 at 2:08 pm

    Am I the only one that noticed last night that Beretti was Ice T cop partner in New Jack City?

    • Ginomo
      March 19, 2015 at 2:12 pm

      My husband noticed that the last episode he was in. He also played the “bad boy” in The Breakfast Club

    • lurker
      March 19, 2015 at 2:36 pm

      actor Judd Nelson. he’s always a good villain

    • Deelish
      March 19, 2015 at 2:37 pm

      Noooooooo! I did not notice!!

  16. C.A.T.
    March 19, 2015 at 2:21 pm

    Yeah, a few holes, but still enjoyable. There needed to be more storyline between Jennifer Hudson going from doing a gospel album to the ‘secular’ song she ended up performing and, as referenced, the ‘trouble’ between Andre & Rhonda (just found out her name, lol).

    Also, the only music I didnt care for all season was the dogfather, Snoop. That was a letdown.

  17. March 19, 2015 at 2:22 pm

    But why did my nerdy, Game of Thrones-obsessed brain think Lucious revealed his real name as, “Da White Walker”? I was so confused for a good couple of seconds until I re-processed it properly. So ashamed…

    • Sarah Ds
      March 19, 2015 at 2:26 pm

      Don’t be. I got your back. Me too

    • dawn
      March 19, 2015 at 3:39 pm

      I heard that too!!!! I said he MUST be high if he gonna be talking abt white walkers in this context!

  18. March 19, 2015 at 2:24 pm

    Also, did you notice how Terrance “Babywipes” Howard sneaked in a reference to Hustle & Flow during his song with Jamal? “Whoop that Trick!” I see you!

    • Cliff
      March 28, 2015 at 2:38 am

      I noticed that too and laughed. My wife (who has never seen Hustle and Flow) looked at me like something was wrong with me. Oh well.

  19. Malcomisha X
    March 19, 2015 at 2:29 pm

    That finale was two hours of my life that I will NEVER get back.
    Lee Daniels decided he no longer wants nice things in this life and so he decided to let this little show go down the drain.

    He needs to re-name the show “DOING THE MOST” it was absolutely TOO much and after the first hour I was tired of the shenanigans.
    He keeps injecting his personal life into this (read: my daddy hated me because I’m gay so I’m going to make the protagonist a homophobic jerk…like ok, we get it, WHY IS SOMEONE CALLING JAMAL A FAGGOT IN EVERY SCENE?? ) why is lee daniels so but hurt, I cannot deal.

    Also, he just decided to fast forward thru a bunch a crap where people who hated each other last week suddenly are working together? Have you ever heard of character development SIR??? So jhud is just gonna go from tamela mann to lil kim in a switch? HOW SWAY HOW?

    AND ANOTHA THING, black lives matters needs to pick up all of their belongings and run as far away from this disaster as possible, I am SO over the damn celebrity cameo’s where they come to do three sentences and leave.

    This finale was reminiscent of the SNL tribute episode where you had a bunch of potential in the room and all they put together was CRAP!
    I will probably just move my ass back to black-ish on Wednesday nights because I can tell you this show is gonna die hard..quick

    • March 20, 2015 at 11:46 am

      I have to agree tha the character development is not given enough thought. Hakeem really going out to ruin his brother doesn’t seem like his style for this entire season. Where did
      that come from?

      And I would like for Mr. Daniels (as one gay man of color to another) to please speak less to the “homophobia in black communities” conversation and speak more to the very real racism in LGBTQ communities.

    • jimmy
      March 20, 2015 at 12:40 pm

      I’m riding with you. I like Taraji so that is my reason for watching. Otherwise no thanks. The stories seem so rushed and unfinished. There is no build up just some explosions and that’s all. A bunch of little explosions. There are so many plot holes I’m scared to drive my car.

      Lee obviously wants us to have the conversation about homosexuality in the black community, in hip hop, etc- cool then have it on your show. You can do it without being preachy or trendy or hateful. Jamal came out and boom, other than Lucious and Black Licorice (because that dudes rhymes sucked) no one had anything bad to say. Be a little more realistic. Don’t just call him a faggot & gloss over it. It is a meaty topic and he grazed by and rushed it. Imagine the build up and struggle we could have witnessed if Jamal hadn’t come out this season and had to “play that role” until next season or two. Aside from an opportunity for some good writing and acting we would have seen more facets to his struggle. Trust me its needed. I’m not trying to exploit anyone’s struggle. That is just one character, one example. One dimensional characters do not make for sustained entertainment.

      I am hoping that the issues with the writing will be worked out & it is just a case where the writers didn’t know if there would be a season 2, so they shot their whole load.

      Now let me go find out how those two bumbling fools hid a body but could not fake a good alibi. All that heavy lifting and cleaning when they could have used their brains instead to concoct a good story so they could call 911. Damn if I’m cleaning that shit. My laziness would outweigh the IPO priority.

    • carleen
      March 20, 2015 at 2:01 pm

      I’m nervous too. I’m a fan, but a good soap is too much. That finale was too too much. Hour 1 I was ok, but hour 2…I think Luvvie might be right and they were afraid they weren’t getting re-upped or something. Hour 2 was like a whole season. Too full of holes and too many 180s for me. And yes I thought most of it was a dream! Not a good sign.

  20. Jessica Williams
    March 19, 2015 at 2:40 pm

    Hakeem and Jamal are so easily manipulated! I thought they knew better! I thought that whole Jamal holding dude off The balcony was somebody’s dream. They jump from too many thing sometimes and it feel like I missed something. Lucious gotta stop with thinking he Jesus ain’t nobody got time for that. Aint nobody gone explain what they did with Vernon’s body? Is he still on the living room floor? Who would they call to clean that up?

    • Julene
      March 19, 2015 at 5:08 pm

      Luv, Huck, and Quinn

      • Julene
        March 19, 2015 at 5:09 pm

        *Liv

      • Dee
        March 20, 2015 at 12:38 am

        bwuahahahahaha… right

  21. Feminita
    March 19, 2015 at 2:48 pm

    Talk about minds playing tricks, why did Lee Daniels name a black girl Becky and a white girl Rhonda? You know you ain’t right, bruh…

  22. Diva
    March 19, 2015 at 2:52 pm

    Did they HuckleberryQuinn Vernon’s body B613 style? Where he at?
    When Lucious & Jamal did that collabo, I felt all of Jamal’s feelings in the way he used the word “shady”. Re Watch it folks.
    Hakeem and his damn mommy issues are gonna destroy him. And I got my entire life when Cookie went Jailhouse rock on BooBoo Kitty!

  23. TristanAXA
    March 19, 2015 at 3:04 pm

    I haven’t read to the end. I am pausing for a cause. WHY? Because Luvvie just CASUALLY asked, “What about Martha Stewart?” then just walked on outta here after she cut my electricity and left me in the darkness WELPINGGGGG!

    You know she enjoys certain privileges we black folk doan know nothing about!

  24. Done
    March 19, 2015 at 3:56 pm

    Sooooo, I gave Empire a season to hook me and it did not.

    I’m not interested in any of these characters but Jamal because he’s the only one that has any sort of back story…well, I love Cookie because, Cookie. There is truly no character development and there are so many loose ends and unfinished story lines.

    Like…Olivia and the baby…what was the point? We already knew Lucious was trash so… And the guy who was killed for the rose on Cookie’s doorstep? Nothing else said about that. And Rhonda…she went from asking Andre how did he do the mayor’s assistant when he got info out of her to leaving him for having an “emotional affair” girl…ok. And now she’s pregnant…allegedly.

    And the heavy heavy reliance on guest appearances…Empire just does a lot and doesn’t do it well. And last but not least, the blasphemy. From the club being called Leviticus (relevant because this is the book of the bible where it outlines sexual sin) to the portrayal of how easily JHud was turned from saint to sinner to Lucious calling himself god…like, I get it;s “just TV” but I’m good. The show isn’t even good enough for me to justify continuing to watch it. It can die in the lake of fire.

  25. Star Woman
    March 19, 2015 at 6:00 pm

    Luvvie you are a Hilarious Hoot!

  26. irene
    March 19, 2015 at 6:52 pm

    Please please Empire creators /writers dont mess up a good thing!
    I am a huge fan but this finale was a HOT MESS!
    Season two
    Let cookie class it up fewer one liners and more of the complicated loving real character we saw in the pilot
    There is no way they could be considered for an Emmy with this episode and I do believe the show has that potential if the writing improves
    Let them not take the ratings for granted because people still want quality even in a night time soap!

  27. thatfriendlyblackgirl
    March 19, 2015 at 7:58 pm

    i tried to enjoy this show but it is just plain garbage. the writing is poor, the story is corny, and so much is crammed into one show. i do not understand why this is a #1 show.

  28. nichole
    March 19, 2015 at 9:54 pm

    I don’t understand why LL didn’t see a long time ago that Jamal is the strongest. Remember how he’s stepped to that gun the other week. Jamal is real G.

    Why would anyone think Cookie would snitch? She’s the kind who would handle it on her own. LL doesn’t know Cookie.

    Boo Boo and Hakeem? No just no. We don’t do that kind of madness. That’s not us.

    Ride or die? I’m more like Ride or faint.

    Cursing someone out in song and falsetto is the new thing!

    Last…Jamal’s favorite movie must be The Five Heartbeats. My office hours are…? 9 to 5

    • Muriel Sutton
      March 20, 2015 at 11:56 am

      “Oh Eleanor….you shouldn’t be alone at a time like this”…..I LIVE!

    • Lena
      March 23, 2015 at 5:31 pm

      GUUURL! You just slayed me with the Five Heartbeats reference as I was thinking about that very thing as he was hanging him off the balcony Big Red styleand trying to get him to sign some musical contracts.

      DEJA’ VU!

    • Lena
      March 23, 2015 at 5:33 pm

      GUUURL! You just slayed me with that Five Heartbeats reference as I was thinking that very thing as he went all Big Red hanging him off the balcony and trying to get him to sign some music contracts!

      DEJA’ VU!

  29. Wes
    March 19, 2015 at 10:42 pm

    When Cookie was talking to Macklemore’s granddaddy about the hostile takeover and his assistant came around to offer her some fried chicken, I cackled! I lived for her expression!

    “Chile, I don’t want no chicken!”

    Taraji can slay a line, but I felt like that was gratuitous.

    What kind of snack time foolery is this, though? Ol’ Tricky ain’t had no meetings with black folk before, so assumptions were made and the chef was told to fry up some chicken? Who in their right mind gonna suck on them bones during a business meeting? No ma’am.

    • jimmy
      March 20, 2015 at 12:56 pm

      Wes I just picture that conversation and hollered. Shame on you!

    • Deelish
      March 20, 2015 at 1:43 pm

      GO DIRECTLY TO THE NEAREST CORNER AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU JUST SAID!!!!! Macklemore’s grandaddy!!??!!
      Also, I was right with you like what kind of racist ish is this? You’re this billionaire and you serve fried chicken to your guests? I guess he figured they are not cultured enough for any more than that. NOT here for that move!

  30. Bukky
    March 20, 2015 at 4:53 am

    “Is that why you’re wearing summer fabric winter? You ain’t scurred? I bet Lucious Lyon wears white loafers. You know he got a Nigerian friend who got him a pair.” THIS. This is why we can’t have nice things. #CRINE

    I hate watching women fight but I was alldaway HERE for the whoop that trick Cookie finally released on Boo Boo Kitty. iLived.

    I truly don’t think they thought it would be renewed so they just took E-V-E-R-Y possible plot line in the world of soap opera drama and threw it up in the air to see if they’d get something to stick…well everything stuck and they rolled with it. While it made for great TV it was a teensie bit too much and I hope they take their time next season. I mean we got a pregnant Rhonda, a murder cover up, the damn IPO finally, LL getting arrested, a saint turned sinner singer, Cookie’s fall from favor, Hakeem hooking up with BBK, Jamal turned thug, Andre in the church then out the church plus a bunch of other stuff in like 2 episodes!! I know we like drama but come on son! Dis tew much!!

    But anywho I’ll be back for season 2!

  31. Monica
    March 20, 2015 at 7:52 am

    I love these recaps. I am there with everyone on them packing too much in the finale. Here is my take: LL needs to get his head out hell and breath some air. He’ll see everyone for who they truly are. I don’t think he ever had any intention of leaving the company to his boys, he’s too cocky (even when he thought he had ALS).
    Da White Walker (lol, I had a Game of Thrones moment too. Glad it wasn’t just me). So, hopefully he changed his name legally or both of those marriages are null and void.
    I think you guys are underestimating the heart and mind of Jamal. Jamal is smart, smarter than his two dumb brothers, who have an entitlement attitude. While LL thinks he’s playing Jamal, Jamal is playing him. He is also the only one who loves his family and doesn’t just think about himself. This turn on Cookie is all an act to put Lucious in a comfort zone. He will be like a Phoenix that will arise from the ashes.
    The hostile takeover will fail because thieves, murderers, cheaters, and liars can never work together because they can’t trust each other. Cookie will use all of them to keep Jamal at the helm because she was the brains that started Empire. Jamal and Tianna are her talent. Speaking of her talent, where did L. Dallas fall off to. You know Anika’s crap has got to catch up to her. Rhonda pregnant? I bet its not Andre’s, that girl is not trying to take the chance of having another Andre running around or she’ll lose it.
    I agree with others, I really hope the writers come back to this planet with their writing. I would like to see this show last multiple seasons.

  32. SIPort
    March 20, 2015 at 8:33 am

    I am so glad that you did this Luvvie. I’m glad you checked back in with us about Empire.

    Jamal was always ‘ the one’. When he pulled a Suge Knight, I wasn’t surprised in the least.

    I predict that Boo Boo Kitty will be carrying a Lyon soon….thanks to Hakim.

    Lucious has some nerve thinking that Cookie snitched about Bunky, when she didn’t snitch all those years ago. We know without a shadow of the doubt, that she went down for Lucious, which makes his treatment of her even more appalling.

    Andre…Andre…Andre….now, you done let that bib girl talk you into covering up Vernon’s death. You DO know that even though it wasn’t you, YOU will be going down for it, don’t you…

    I don’t believe she’s pregnant. Period.

    I’m so glad that Cookie got loving from a GOOD MAN.

    And Boo Boo Kitty…I just would never step to someone who did 17 years in the pen….would never occur to me. You got some good licks in, but Cookie would have had you toothless if you all had continued to fight.

    I love this show, and can’t wait to get the DVD.

  33. carleen
    March 20, 2015 at 2:07 pm

    Nobody’s gonna say anything about them sneaking in “Whoop that Trick?” I expected LL to start singing It’s hard out here for a pimp. But I did really like that song he and Jamal did.

  34. RaeJ
    March 20, 2015 at 5:34 pm

    The show completely jumped the shark! In the beginning I knew Jamal would get the keys to the kingdom. Think about how his character was created and who created the show. Hakeem raps, but he always needs help from Jamal and he is young, silly, and made in the image of Chris Brown so therefore he can’t win. Andre has the business education, but no musical talents. Plus he married a white woman and his daddy told him that was a no-no. Jamal’s only “flaw” is that he wants nothing to do with women. He’s close to his mom, a hard worker, and wants his dad’s respect. So the audience cheers for him. I really hate they changed Jamal’s character. There was a lot of character shifting last night. And I hated the sleep talk scene.Malik Yoba did an interview about the shitty character development. He was spot on.
    Anyway, I grew up on Dallas…so to me LL and Cookie are a watered down version of J.R and Sue Ellen. Nobody was a bigger asshole than J.R. and I loved him!

  35. Nia
    March 20, 2015 at 8:04 pm

    WAYMENT. Lucious blazer at the old house looked like they pieced together somebody’s comforter or corduroy sweat suit. I was burning up sweating watching that scene. Too damn hot for me to enjoy that.

  36. Kami
    March 20, 2015 at 11:06 pm

    Can we submit a Change.org petition to have you take over recaps for Empire on Vulture. That situation is a mess!

  37. Mstink
    March 21, 2015 at 9:00 pm

    WABBLE VOICE…lmao!!! I like T Howard but that voice booothers me. I agree I love the show and will stick with it regardless but this finale was too rushed for me. There were way too many changes way too fast and it makes me nervous that it’s going downhill next season but I’ll be here for it. Great recap as always.
    Now some sidenotes and questions:
    -It would have been so much better if they did a dna test and lil lola was Jamal’s. I liked them showing that a gay black man can be a good father too.
    -I think Boo Boo Kitty is gon turn up pregnant
    -I’m glad Cookie got her some, besides you cant be Derek Luke type of fine and not hook up with somebody
    -Queen Cookie is every single thing.
    -Hakeem’s bff is played by Azmarie Livingston who is Raven Symone’s gf but didn’t Raven used to go with Jussie Smollett too?? Now what does that have to do with anything…absolutely nothing I’m just nosy!

  38. March 22, 2015 at 6:06 am

    Loved the Lucious reference to ‘Hustle & Flow’ with his “whoop that trick”! Lyric

  39. TD
    March 25, 2015 at 2:33 pm

    all of this and ya’ll comments
    I actually think they adjusted some things for the finale
    for one
    LL not having ALS and now MG
    that was a definite change…all season it felt like they were hoping for at mimum 3 seasons since he had 3 years but now with the reup they probably can get a good 5 seasons out of the show…hence the change…

    there was a lot
    A LOT
    i too wonder if Uncle V was high on his own supply when he went to talk
    LL should know Cookie better than that
    and Cookie and Jamal ARE much smarter so I can’t wait to see the flash backs and connecting of the dots they do for season 2
    I don’t think LL gonna get out until the end though
    he might be locked up for at least season 2