Whose Demon Canta Melon Baby Is This?
Sometimes, people get really creative at baby showers. Apparently, the toilet tissue game isn’t innovative enough anymore and the food needs to make a statement. I came upon the picture below, of one of the snacks from someone’s shower and I jumped back and almost threw holy water on my laptop.
Ok THIS is frightening. I mean it. There’s a cantaloupe baby in a watermelon with grape eyes and it is threatening to haunt my hopes and dreams. They were going for cute but this is hella creepy. I’d walk past it and rebuke it at the same time. NOPE.
Then the baby is under an avalanche of melon slices and I am just not ok with it. I posted it on the Awesomely Luvvie Facebook page and let folks have at it. In fact, shoutout to Tiffany, whose comment is what I used to title this post.
“This is what happens when you have to bring something to the shower, and your potato salad game is weak. Trying to be creative and hide your lack of skills.” – RM
“Next time just go to the Children’s store and buy rompers and diapers.” – YP
“That is horrifying! It’s looking at me…I can’t look away…..” – NC
“People, you can’t work with fruit when it’s 95 degrees and you ain’t got air conditioning. That baby has the meat sweats!” – LD
“That baby has jaundice” – RM
“Rosemary is on line 1 and she needs her baby back!” – DJ
“It looks like a baby shower for a pregnant opossum.🙈🙈🙈#Shivers” – MM
“That baby don’t feel good…” – SW
“I call dibbs on the eyes! I love grapes.” – LC
“Who got the idea to make a damned watermelon fetus!?!!?! I’m never going to cut a watermelon up again!! The EYES alone are the reason I’m about to have this extra mimosa. Stop making foods that look like babies. I know a young person had to do this because my aunties and them would never agree to concoct this fuckery.” – BN
“This gives new meaning to the saying: “Your baby is so cuuuute I could just eat it up!!!!” – DE
“Unncessary fruit abuse.” – MH
“And wait, who the hell ate this? I’m giving them disgusted side-eye too…Nasty. That ugly baby demon fruit better had left the same way it came in…” – MB
“No one! Nobody ate this! This abomination looks like it’s on its third shower because no one will touch it! They probably sprayed this abomination with lacquer and keep dragging it out.” – LD
“See this is what happens when your cousin decides to supplement her income by starting an event planning business with a $20 gift card from the dollar tree and her EBT card” – JM
“Are they having an alien baby?” – RH
“What’s wrong with coming together around an amorphous and severely jaundiced newborn with soulless, bloodshot eyes?” – DH
“Loose now in the name of GeeZus foul demon!” – JC
“Was it a horror themed baby shower?” – MH
“When You Try To Support Yo’ Cuzzin An Dem’s New Start~Up Business… Outta Their Kitchen!” – TS
“When did a good ole box of yellow cake mix become obsolete? Momma used to cut up fruit in the kitchen and put it in the big plastic bowl and we loved it.” – PS
“Omfg nooo this looks like a child’s uterus science project” – AS
“Poor aborted melon.” – MP
“Nooooooooo…in every language, every font, and sign language too. NOPE… creepy ass fruit bowl” – MJ
“Why? Cause they had the scraper tool and the poor defenseless watermelon! This is not right!” – DA
“Am I the only one who thought it was a puppy? 😟” – KR
“Am I the only one who looks at this creepy-ass thing and sees a Podling from The Dark Crystal?” – TU
“I’m in bed INNOCENTLY scrolling my timeline and I read Luvvie’s comment THEN I see this picture. Luvvie almost made me mess up my bed linen.” – JS
“when trying to be THAT hostess goes wrong!!! LOL” – RD
“It looks like the baby is still in the uterus.” – EA
“Pinterest got people out here thinking they’re Martha Stewart when they’re really Chef Boyardee.” – RM
“Unless there are copious amounts of liquor to drown that baby in, I cannot partake in this fuckery.” – EDH
“No…just no. I’m not eating that, ma’am. Looks like some sort of illuminati blood offering.” – JW
“My mom taught me not to waste food, but if I was at a shower with something like that, it would be the one time I would not obey.” – JV
“So clearly we all have missed the garter used as an accent? And I have the sinking feeling the thought process for it was “well it’s been laying around since I went to that Bachelorette party, and I only wore it when we went pole dancing, so it’s all aired out by now. So, you’re eating creepy cantaloupe baby with a side of thigh sweat and pole.” – ET
“Using fetus to feed us…” – KAB
“Why does this make my scalp itch?” – CM
LMAO! They are so unable to chill over on my Facebook page. I LIVE for it!
So… whose demon canta melon baby is this? Do y’all need to be banned from Pinterest? Let’s discuss.