Food

Starbucks’ Unicorn Frappuccino is a Weapon of Mass Diabetes

Honestly, folks do not want us to have nice things, like long lives where we don’t struggle with the gout or an extreme case of “the sugars.” Folks like Starbucks, who just released a new drink called the Unicorn Frappuccino. It’s a limited edition offering, available nationwide until April 23. This …

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Food

Because Now You Can Get Collard Greens at Neiman Marcus

So at this point, I think the theme for 2016 is FIRMLY “The Devil is Busy.” As in, this year’s hashtag should be #TheDevilisBusy2016. Or #SatanisPuttinginWork2016. Because there is just too much foolishment happening. TEW MUCH, FATHA GAWD. What happened this time? Well, luxury store Neiman Marcus is now offering …

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Food

The Great Candy Debate: Because Sweets Ain’t A Game

Y’all know how seriously we take candy around these parts. There have been many conversations about candy here. Like the fact that yellow starbursts are the ones you give your archnemesis. And how candy corn is the devil. Well, last year, my friends and I entered into a serious discussion …

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Food

Candy Corn Tastes Like Plastic and Despair

Candy is meant to spike our blood sugar, bring a party into our mouths that no one else is invited to and pay for our dentists’ vacation homes. All great things, really. But sometimes, candy exists as a conspiracy to our taste buds. The main type of candy that does …

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Food

No Country for Yellow Starbursts (aka Disappointment Chews)

Starbursts are candy that I’m passionate about and the creators have clearly created a candy caste system to allow us to rank the people in our lives by the color we give them. Pink is the starburst you give your best friend to show them your love is real. Yellow …

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Food

I Want Red Velvet Oreos to Be Real So Bad AND THEY ARE!

Yall know I love all things red velvet. Red velvet cupcakes, cheesecake, cookies, waffles, pancakes, hot chocolate… I am the  bubba Gumb of red velvet. This is why in the past 48 hours, so many people have sent me this picture. Everyone has sent me this SAME picture and I …

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Food

Why Does Kale Taste Like Dreams Deferred?

One day I looked up and everyone had become the Bubba Gump of Kale, talmbout kale salad, kale soup, kale smoothies, kale sammiches, kale nail polish (yes really. It’s called NailKale. Everyone go home. You’re drunk!). It was all kale everything and I was like whappened? Why it happen? I …

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Potato Salad KickStarter
Food

3 Lessons From the Potato Salad Kickstarter Campaign That’s Raised Over $22,000

There’s a KickStarter campaign for potato salad and it’s made over $22,000. A guy posted a campaign on Kickstarter about how he wants to make potato salad and he set the goal to $10. Well, he’s now raised $22,500 (as of 3pm CST on July 7, 2014) with 25 days left. 1,750 people …

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Bacon fried cinnamon rolls
Food

This is What I Call Deep-Fried Heart Attack

It’s no secret that America’s fat. The country survives on a diet of sugar with a side of carbs and dessert of deep fried butter (I’m looking at you, Paula Deen). And chicken. That part is important. We musn’t forget about chicken. Now, this slow death brought to us by …

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Fried Kool-Aid
Food

Fried Kool-Aid is the Devil’s Snack

There are times I know the Devil has minions on Earth, and whoever invented Fried Kool-Aid is clearly one of them. What in all that is good, holy, sanctified and healthy is with that??? And I’m the fool who wants to try Red Velvet Fried Chicken. Even I’ve got my …

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