FoodTop Posts

Why Does Kale Taste Like Dreams Deferred?

One day I looked up and everyone had become the Bubba Gump of Kale, talmbout kale salad, kale soup, kale smoothies, kale sammiches, kale nail polish (yes really. It’s called NailKale. Everyone go home. You’re drunk!). It was all kale everything and I was like whappened? Why it happen? I …

Jesus Flips Table gif
CultureFaithLetterTop Posts

Dear Fellow Christians, About This Christ Crutch We Use to Justify Foolery…

I just feel like I need to talk to my faith-similar folks for a second. Dear Christians, I’m a life-long Christian and I was raised by a village of protectors and guardians who included my Grandmother, a lover of the Lord (with all her heart and soul). She taught me that being …

Jermaine Jackson hair
Famous folksTop Posts

Something’s On Jermaine Jackson’s Scalp and It’s a Mystery

Jermaine Jackson has somehow turned out to be the oddest man in a family of really talented weird people and that is no small feat. Besides all the foolery he partakes in, like changing his last name to Jacksun (O__O) and being stuck in Africa because of his lack of …

Lupita Nyongo
Famous folksLetterTop Posts

Dear Lupita Nyong’o, Why Must You Slay Us Completely?

My newest celebrity crush is Lupita Nyong’o and if you have to ask me why, then we have nothing to talk about. I’m here to write her a love letter, because she is everything. I’m not even here to talk about her performance in 12 Years a Slave. No. I’m …

Everything Coming up mellie 2
Top PostsTV and Movies

Everything’s Coming Up Mellie: Scandal Episode 307 Recap

For a show that is notorious for shocking us with a new development every episode to outdo itself is no small feat and Scandal did that with episode 7 of season 3. When it ended, I literally spent 20 minutes just mumbling to myself saying “OMG I CAN’T” at random …

Halloween Blackface
CultureTop Posts

Halloween Has a Blackface Issue and It’s a Racism Problem

Every year. EVERY GAHTDAMB YEAR, Halloween rolls around and we have to deal with folks who want to paint themselves black and brown for some costume. It is exhausting and enraging and absolutely overwhelming. It’s REALLY hard for me to write about it because I just wanna cuss and fight …

Stages of Twitter Dealing with a Beyonce Event
Famous folksSocial MediaTop Posts

Stages of Social Media Dealing with a Beyoncé Event

Beyoncé is the world’s biggest popstar right now and whether you love her or not, it’s hard to argue this fact. Based purely on her numbers and accomplishments and popularity, she is. Every move of hers is clocked and folks act a fool at the sound of her name. Especially …

Target takes all your money
My LifeTop Posts

There’s Voodoo at Target Stores to Make You Spend All Your Money

Seriously. There has GOT to be some sort of voodoo at Target. That is the only explanation for how that place traps the most innocent people into these marathon shopping excursions that result in overdrawn bank accounts and hurting feet. First of all, going to Target on a Sunday is …

Shirley Brown Woman to Woman
LetterMusicTop Posts

Dear Shirley, Woman to Woman, Don’t Be Calling Barbara’s House Like That!

I was listening to Shirley Brown’s Woman to Woman, and I was just like “You know what? Shirley was TRIPPING.” So I decided to write her a sternly-worded letter. In case you’ont know what song I’m talmbout, see below: “Hey Barbara, this is Shirley. You might not know who I …

CultureMy LifeTop Posts

The Foreign Name Struggle Is Real

Yesterday was my post telling parents to quit naming their kids stupidly. It turned out to be EPIC, with 300 comments on it (now: 600) and counting (record for this blog). And y’all might have made my site crash for a good hour yesterday with foolery. Folks acted UP in …